Scott Kidd
Scott Kidd has performed on Kill Tony 8 times. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.
Appearances
Scott joked about the South not marrying cousins, smoking for 16 years looking like a cigarette, and the difficulty of quitting while people pressure him about it.
- Despite beliefs, not all Southerners marry cousins, some just fuck them.
- Smoking 16 years, could've done push-ups instead, looks like a cigarette.
- People pressure him about quitting smoking; he should be enabled not criticized.
Scott did a premise comparing Helen Keller vs Mother Teresa as lovers, noting Helen Keller's advantages due to being unable to speak back. Heavy on profanity and shock value with minimal setup.
- Helen Keller better lover than Mother Teresa because won't talk back
About getting Candy Crush requests from fat women on Facebook, ranting about ugly women needing insulin shots, uses mic stand slam as signature move.
- Fat women send Candy Crush requests, probably crushing actual candy bags.
Scott Kidd discusses dating difficulties, working well under pressure, fat girls, online dating apps OkCupid and Plenty of Fish, and discovering he has a girlfriend when condoms turned into tampons.
- Fat chicks like to fuck him because he works under pressure
- Discovered girlfriend when condoms turned into tampons
Scott made a brief Thor joke about him playing golf at Pebble Beach using only his hammer as a club.
- Thor returns from Avengers, plays golf at Pebble Beach with hammer
Set about compulsive gamblers at casinos and their inability to do math. References 9/11 multiple times as a punchline device.
- Compulsive gamblers lose money but don't understand why they continue
- Repeatedly saying 9/11 as a punchline device without comedic payoff
Character comedy set using weird voice delivering material about condoms turning into tampons, wet dreams that were actually diarrhea, and various absurdist bits.
- Bought condoms that magically turned into box of tampons overnight
- Had wet dream that turned out to be diarrhea instead
- Grim Reaper fucking you is technically self-love not necrophilia
Mentions Iron Patriot's Nissan Versa; jokes about casino work with Asians; joke about 'hot asian women' as foreign policy; 'dick teasers' punchline.
- Instead of invasion, send hot Asian women, call them dick teasers