Kill Tony #157 — Ralphie May, Ahmed Ahmed
Guests: Ralphie May · Ahmed Ahmed
Lineup
Set: Moses performed jokes about hookups with unflattering women, teaching middle school, and black baby names, ending with a punchline about a student named Air Sean whose father was inspired by Air Jordan.
Interview: Moses revealed he's a musician and middle school English teacher from Pittsburgh. Discussion covered his band The Blind Honey Bees, his musical background, and awkward admissions about underprepared material and lack of comedy experience.
- Hookup so gross immediate cleanup required; feathers in bed from chicken
- Black parents play Boggle to name kids, resulting in made-up names
- Student named Air Sean after Air Jordan; doesn't know his father
- Moses shut down the laugh track himself before final punchline, signaling he was done
- Tony and Ralphie gave Moses direct coaching about performance and preparation
Set: Catherine joked about men with small dogs as chick magnets versus signs of girlfriend control, observing that no self-respecting man buys a small dog. She suggested Jack Daniel's bottles are better chick magnets than small dogs.
Interview: Catherine disclosed she's a recovering alcoholic who drank half to full bottles of whiskey nightly, woke up in a van after sex, watches tentacle porn and animation, and does aerobic pole dancing. She shared explicit sexual experiences and discussed harm reduction in explicit content.
- Men with small dogs viewed as chick magnets; actually signs of girlfriend
- Jack Daniel's bottle better chick magnet than small Shih Tzu mix
- Catherine revealed waking up in a van after sleeping with someone whose name she didn't remember
- Tony advised Catherine to put her bukkake joke about Japanese animation consent into her act
- Ralphie Mae and Ahmed escalated discussion into explicit pornography categories and details
Set: Britt's second-ever set featured an anti-joke about Anna Nicole Smith impression she didn't perform, a story about quitting a breakfast restaurant job over refusing to call a kids' bagel sandwich 'an egg bagel junior,' and observational humor about work.
Interview: Britt revealed she's worked in restaurants for 12 years, plays guitar and piano, has skydived, watches 'nice porn,' and is from Arkansas living in Nashville. Tony praised her as the night's best performer so far.
- Anna Nicole Smith impression teased but never delivered; anti-joke structure
- Quit breakfast restaurant job protesting refusal to call kids' bagel 'egg bagel junior'
- Tony declared Britt the best of the night after strong energy and material
- Britt sang a short line from The Blind Honey Bees despite nervousness
Set: Ben's well-crafted set included jokes about wishing stepfads dead, masturbation warnings from uncles, poverty and basketball, and a closing bit about defending hillside shacks from 'hill people.' The material was tight with genuine punchlines.
Interview: Ben is a history professor at MTSU with a PhD in history, hosts a comedy game show 'Perfect Timing,' has a podcast 'The Road to Now,' built a log cabin in Appalachia during grad school, and owns a cabin in Big Bear Lake. He disclosed racist experiences at Big Bear and discussed civil rights history.
- Wishing stepfather dead; wondering what to do instead of that
- Uncle said shaking it more than twice is 'playing with it'; lost custody joke
- Poor kid wanted basketball for poverty escape; blocked shots and 'shack attack'
- Ben shared William Henry Harrison history: elected oldest president, died 30 days later from pneumonia after long inaugural speech in rain
- Ben disclosed racist comment heard within 24 hours at Big Bear Lake about 'n words'
- Tony praised Ben's tight material and preparation despite earlier seeming unimpressed at barbecue
Set: Josh performed third-ever set as scattered spoken-word premises instead of traditional jokes: fragmented notes about ex-girlfriends, calluses on tonsils, emergency vehicle mood rings, and disconnected observations about fire, cops, and cats. The performance received minimal laughs.
Interview: Josh revealed nervousness, works in CNC machinery maintenance, is married to Jessica (third-grade teacher), practices Brazilian jiu-jitsu, watches Predators hockey. Ahmed and Ralphie coached him on commitment, directness, and the need to perform open mics nightly.
- Ex-girlfriend had calluses on tonsils because she was 'no quitter'
- Mood ring changed colors like emergency vehicle lights for girlfriend moods
- Ralphie gave extensive coaching about not being cute, answering directly, and committing to jokes
- Josh admitted extreme nervousness and fear during performance
- Ahmed advised Josh to do open mics every night and develop his voice
Set: Sarah performed tight material about narcolepsy: people asking if it's 'cool,' asking about sex, discussing the falling-down symptom triggered by shock/emotion, wanting surprise parties but collapsing at start, and a friend questioning her driving ability.
Interview: Sarah disclosed having her first orgy three weeks ago (four people total, two men and two women), revealed she takes Ritalin for narcolepsy, flies to multiple cities for comedy (LA, Houston, Chicago-based), and prefers butt play only in relationships.
- Narcolepsy not cool; people ask to 'do it' like magic trick
- Falling-down symptom triggered by emotion; wanted surprise party but would collapse
- Friend questioned if Sarah could drive with narcolepsy while halfway to destination
- Sarah disclosed first-time orgy experience, received immediate applause and encouragement from panel
- Ralphie praised Sarah's honesty and suggested she expand on personal experiences in material
- Sarah became social media sensation during interview; Tony noted she's gaining followers as she speaks