Pedro Valenzuela
Pedro Valenzuela has performed on Kill Tony 4 times. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.
Appearances
Three years of stand-up, jokes about Kamala Harris looking like mom, Biden/Trump, gender reveal party discovering girlfriend was hermaphrodite with penis.
- Kamala Harris looks like mom, can't trust her like Biden with Barron
- Girlfriend gender reveal party: she was hermaphrodite with tiny penis clit
Pedro delivered edgy jokes about Dominican heritage, colonial history, and impressions of Matthew McConaughey. The set was characterized by dark humor about historical rape and absurdist impressions.
- Dominicans vs Puerto Ricans: Dominicans don't wear flags on shoes, only wear their own flag.
- Dark joke about Dominican island having most 'rapeable' native population due to Spanish colonization.
- Matthew McConaughey impression during oral sex where he continues saying 'alright, alright, alright' after climaxing.
High-energy set about getting turnt up and missing his Narcotics Anonymous meeting; using one nostril for cocaine; missing drug dealer; Ellen Page transition joke.
- Using only one nostril for cocaine creates half brain doing business deals, half killing vibe.
- Drug dealer told him ecstasy would 'put the tits back on Ellen Page'; Pedro took it.
Jokes about COVID rapid tests (thinks he has AIDS), hiding things in afro, not marching for peace, Black Lives Matter but doesn't want baby mama pregnant again.
- Mic condoms on mics - prefer original condom the mouth
- Bought rapid test online, got wrong one, think I have AIDS
- Have afro, people ask if hiding something, yeah an asshole