Taylor Rizzo
Taylor Rizzo has performed on Kill Tony 7 times. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.
Appearances
Set about white guilt regarding slavery, conversation with friend, woman chiming in claiming she wouldn't own slaves, response about legal rights to slap women. Long setup, incomplete delivery.
- If 200 years ago, could legally slap woman for talking out of turn
- Women 200 years ago didn't get to own slaves or opinions
Jokes about ambiguous ethnicity due to beard; story about claiming quarter-Black identity to impress half-Black girl; punchline involves full-Black friend's validation via 'I know a nigga beard when I see one'; callback about not actually being Black.
- Beard helps ambiguous ethnicity; claims quarter-Black to impress half-Black girl; gets validated by full-Black friend
Taylor performs about kissing a girl on top of the head during sex, which she found weird because it was sweet. He riffs on being the type of guy who acts like a boyfriend during hookups and compares himself favorably to no-strings-attached dating.
- Kissed girl on head during sex, she said it's weird because sweet
- Acts like boyfriend during hookups but no strings attached
Smart premise about safe words in bedroom - only needed for rape fantasies. Uses 'rape' as his personal safe word which ends the bit awkwardly.
- Safe words only needed for rape fantasy to say stop without stopping.
- His personal safe word is 'rape' because he'll stop if she says it.
Taylor discusses fear of dating fake women, preferring women with big noses because nobody wants those. Uses beard as metaphor for authenticity versus makeup.
- Attracted to girls with big noses because nobody's taking them
- Beard is natural unlike makeup; on desert island that's what face looks like
Taylor performs a 30-second set about telling people to suck their dick and the politeness differential based on attractiveness.
- Tell people to suck my dick but always nicer to people I actually want
Rizzo performs about TSA profiling due to his beard, proposing ways to waste TSA time by smuggling his own belongings up his butthole. He makes the joke that TSA can't arrest him for being weird.
- Smuggle keys/wallet/passport up butthole so TSA wastes time on weirdness not crime