Kill Tony #286
Lineup
Set: Robbie discusses driving 8 hours, parking concerns, and a relationship starting with a girl saying 'I'm not anti-semitic but.' He jokes about smoking girls and banking material he didn't finish.
Interview: Tony and panel discuss Robbie's recent cannabis edible consumption (Oreo shake with cannabutter), his move to Boone North Carolina, his printing press job at a candy factory, and his recreational drug use.
- Girl opened with 'I'm not anti-semitic but' during pillow talk
- Girls who smoke cigarettes will roll the dice with cancer so she'll roll the dice with me
- Robbie runs out of material mid-set, realizes he could have banked the time
- Admits to consuming 8-10 spliffs and cannabutter before the show
Set: Jimmy tells a rambling, confusing story about his mother driving him as a 2-year-old into a KKK rally in Jackson, Mississippi in 1976 to attend his grandfather's Navy ceremony, interrupted repeatedly by Tony.
Interview: Tony struggles to understand Jimmy's story structure and plot. Discussion covers his lack of stand-up experience, his mother's southern personality, and his appearance as someone who might be Black.
- Mother's response to cop: 'I don't give a [bleep] I need to go, my daddy's about to get his ceremony'
- Multiple interruptions by Tony demanding clarity on story structure; Jimmy appears confused
- Tony stops the set multiple times, frustrated with unclear narrative
Set: Matt discusses being broke, avoiding gas pump shakes, and uses self-deprecating comedy about his appearance and thrift-store fashion.
Interview: Tony teases Matt's fashion sense, his social work job in Murfreesboro, his MTSU education, family background (psychologist mom, engineer dad), Alabama origins, and sexual history including awkward questions about cousins.
- Broke so badly homeless won't make eye contact; doesn't feel need to shake out gas pump drops
- Bought fanny pack because pattern looks like skate center carpet
- Tony makes extensive cousin incest jokes during interview, Matt deflects
- Matt reveals he masturbates with lights on; becomes opening line suggestion
Graham
Set: Graham jokes about girlfriends as slot machines, his narcissism and relapse in a house of mirrors, his thin frame compared to Jack Skellington, and creates a Papa John's bit with Michael Richards references about all-white pizza.
Interview: Tony praises Graham's first-time performance, suggests improving the Papa John's bit by removing Michael Richards reference, discusses his work as fishing rod distributor, keto diet, and his broken leg recovery aided by Kill Tony podcast.
- Girlfriend like slot machine he's never getting money back from
- Michael Richards Papa John's all-white pizza bit with olives criticism
- Tony provides real-time joke writing coaching on Papa John's bit
- Graham reveals Kill Tony podcast helped him through physical recovery
Sam C
Set: Sam discusses his massive 6'9" frame, the inevitability of death from heart attack, not seeing old large people, being dehumanized, and comparing himself to old horses being euthanized. Mentions 'freaky girls' and pierced nipples.
Interview: Tony is impressed by Sam's stage presence and wrestler-like build. Discussion covers his artist management career, rugby background, ability to lift people (lifts Jeremiah easily), family (brothers are taller/successful), and dating life.
- Never seen old person my size so I could die at any moment
- Dehumanizing to be human rhinoceros compared to Great Dane being shot like Seabiscuit
- Sam easily lifts Jeremiah Watkins (400 lbs) on stage, impressing crowd
- Reveals friend stabbed him in his sleep, motivated him to be on podcast
Set: Nick opens with his community college English teaching job, discusses student plagiarism and creative writing, summer break paid suspension similar to racist cops, and suspended with pay as vacation.
Interview: Tony discusses Nick's 18 months of stand-up, 8 years teaching at Motlow State, student behavior, and acts out a classroom confrontation scenario with Tony as a disruptive student.
- Community college means appropriate applause level; teaches reading, writing, plagiarism studies
- Suspended with pay is vacation where you pretend to be sad and can't post pics online
- Tony acts as disruptive student in classroom roleplay, Nick handles with humor
- Sound system issues addressed mid-interview; Tony frustrated with audio quality
Jimmy
Set: Jimmy's very short set: went to a funeral, friend died owing him $45, girl once licked his ass and blew in it unexpectedly.
Interview: Tony discovers Jimmy is 30, first-time comedian who listens to Kill Tony podcast weekly and was inspired to try stand-up. Is a mailman with 5 years experience, has two kids (8 and 4), and recently had a hand-holding accusation from earlier attendee.
- Friend died, owes me $45, not getting that back
- Girl licked ass and blew into it unexpectedly
- Jimmy accuses Tony of hand-holding his girlfriend at previous show; Tony denies
- Tony and Jimmy argue about whether hand-holding incident actually occurred
Matt Cox
Set: Matt jokes about midlife crisis and wanting a Jeep Wrangler, describes Jeeps as hormone replacement therapy on wheels, compares midlife crises to white guy tropes versus other ethnicities, references blog-hopping baseball stadiums.
Interview: Tony learns Matt started comedy 2 weeks ago after seeing Kill Tony listed at Zanies, is 35, married 12 years, has 4 kids (2 boys, 2 girls), works in audio/video production marketing, and discusses relationships and intimacy.
- Jeep Wrangler is hormone replacement therapy on wheels; get bald and fat, get out with ponytail and erection
- Midlife crises are white guy thing; never hear about Asian guy quitting for hot dog blog
- Aggressive female audience member yelled multiple times; Tony shuts her down repeatedly
- Tony creates 'Live PD' game where audience should restrain disruptive female attendee
Set: Clay discusses fleas infesting his house and getting drunk on his and his cat's blood, frequent flea orgasms in the bedroom, joking he'd rather masturbate than hear flea sex sounds, and references flea reproductive cycles.
Interview: Tony reveals Clay drove from Cincinnati and was at the previous Cincinnati show. Clay is an electrical contractor who works for Navy SEALs, was previously on the show, and has fleas from equestrian district.
- Fleas drunk on mine and cat's blood having orgasms in bedroom daily
- Rather masturbate than hear fleas [bleep] all day
- Callback to Cincinnati show where Clay bumped Navy SEALs' wife
- Clay appears with knife during interview; Tony jokingly asks about self-harm
Set: Corey's first stand-up ever discusses nervousness, seeing gay guy in same outfit, Catholic school Catholic school pedophilia (altar boy/boy scout timing), and how transferring to public school changed his trajectory.
Interview: Tony learns Corey actually did open mic at Auburn Starbucks (not a true first), graduated with geology degree, waits tables at Italian restaurant in Birmingham, lives with parents, is 23, and considering kiwi picking in New Zealand.
- Catholic school started altar boy/boy scout same year; multiplied molestation chances by two
- Saw gay guy in same outfit downtown; realized might be stylish
- Corey lies about virginity; actually did Auburn Starbucks open mic
- Extended segment 'Let's Talk [Bleep]' attempts to discuss Corey's penis; doesn't go anywhere
Micah Lea
Set: Micah discusses teachers mispronouncing his name (Le/Lea), dropping out of school because of it, two mental institution stays (first like One Flew Over Cuckoo's Nest, second with 'African-American Medusa' arguing), lifetime depression and regret.
Interview: Tony discovers Micah is 33, Ford dealership technician, Taurus, has been suicidal, was just in mental institution this year, and his angry brother is in the audience and previously did stand-up.
- Teachers mispronouncing 'Lea' as 'Lee'; one teacher said 'Macaé Lea' so decided to drop out
- Second mental institution stay with 'African-American Medusa' who argues instead of turning you to stone
- Tony reveals brother Talon in audience will do closing set; first-ever 'brother off' on Kill Tony
- Uncomfortable interview about suicidal ideation; Tony attempts humor, audience mostly silent
Talon Snyder
Set: Talon discusses stabbing incident at Atlanta music festival Airbnb (avoided paying for oxy by lifting seller's nuts on his door handle after seeing knife), crazy rules at Airbnb like no walking in hallway in underwear.
Interview: Tony learns Talon is Micah's brother (the 'brother off' closing act), was in Air Force doing military intelligence, now project manager at Dell, does kickboxing, can kick very high, and is healthier/more successful than his brother.
- Guy offers oxy at music festival; Talon avoids paying by putting nuts on seller's door handle
- Historic first 'brother off' on Kill Tony; Talon performs closing set
- Talon demonstrates high kickboxing kick at crowd/stage request during interview
- Jeremiah Watkins demonstrates emo character's flexibility, matches Talon's kicking ability