KILL TONY Wiki

Kill Tony #408

📅 October 26, 2019 📍 Melbourne, VIC 🎤 11 comedians

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Lineup

1

Raul

Set: Raul's first stand-up set references divorce, single life, and dating mishaps with crude humor about squirting and bodily functions.

Interview: 47-year-old divorced for 4 years, has two kids (ages 9 and 8), works in steel construction, practices psychedelics and fishing.

Bits:
  • Compares squirting women to hippo tail movements and bodily functions.
  • References accidentally swallowing squid and not being a prude about it.
Moments:
  • Tony jokingly establishes 'Tony is a pedophile' as a running joke after mentioning ages 9 and 8.
2

Kanye East

Set: Kanye East performs an absurdist character obsessed with candy bars and nonsensical rants, breaking character midway through.

Interview: Real name Joe Hate Schumer, been doing stand-up 10 years, developed Kanye character over 2 months, performs characters mostly.

Bits:
  • Character obsesses over not having 30 cents for candy bar at 7-Eleven.
Moments:
  • Kanye East wins drum solo competition against Joel Berg in surprisingly close match.
  • Reveals he moved into deceased woman's house and paid her back council rates.
3

Liam O'Brien

Golden Ticket

Set: Liam delivers clean observational humor about gender assumptions, gym signs, afterlife choices, and absurd scenarios.

Interview: First time doing stand-up, on-and-off for 7 years total, from Melbourne, full-time carer for uncle with prostate cancer (2 months left).

Bits:
  • Girls don't know if they're being talked to because of their boobs.
  • Stairway to heaven vs highway to hell means choosing hell to avoid stairs.
  • Hit cop holding 'stop police' sign with car.
Moments:
  • Awarded golden ticket, only the seventh in show history.
  • Revelation that he has sex with a girl from Plenty of Fish dating app.
4

Bobby Sandhu

Set: 19-year-old tells a story about a Buddhist temple lady asking him to pray for her son, only to encounter him partying and doing coke.

Interview: 19-year-old from Central Coast (north of Sydney), moved to Melbourne at 15 for jujitsu, blue belt, works weekend security, enrolled in police academy.

Bits:
  • Buddhist temple lady asks him to pray for her son; later discovers it's his coke-using friend.
Moments:
  • Reveals his parents are Sikh but he told them he was becoming cop when really doing comedy and drugs.
5

Paul Young

Set: Paul covers singing in street, dead father-in-law buried at Mount Meru with 8-hour drive to cemetery, social media insults from daughters.

Interview: From Adelaide, works in tax office handling deceased estates, married 31 years, 3 daughters, coaches running, won 1985 Stawell Gift twice.

Bits:
  • Father-in-law buried; doesn't remember where, can't find body for wife's graveside visit.
Moments:
  • Nearly unintelligible thick Australian accent makes it hard for Tony and audience to understand.
6

Dan Blair

Set: Dan attacks Catholic Church methodology, jokes about priest screening questions including video game use and cryptic usernames.

Interview: Owns cleaning and gardening company in Queensland, 36 years old, 3 redheaded sons (12 and 9-year-old twins), married 31 years, hobby mountain biker.

Bits:
  • Three screening questions for priests: drink wine from box, play Fortnite, have cryptic username.
Moments:
  • Tony struggles to understand his Australian accent repeatedly during interview.
7

JC

Set: JC jokes about recent breakup, dating challenges, admits to cheating on ex-girlfriend, jokes about dating his sister (claims joking).

Interview: Started comedy this year, works selling swords, raps on weekends, smokes weed, recently broke up with girlfriend who called 14 times.

Bits:
  • Dating is hard; girl cared he cheated but hung up on 3-year age gap.
  • Makes joke about dating sister; insists it's humor while revealing breakup details.
Moments:
  • Reveals he works selling swords and guy he sold to may have stabbed people on Bourke Street.
8

John King

Set: John's first stand-up about living in Collingwood becoming hipster, prostate fluid changes, and reading color charts in 7-Eleven.

Interview: First-ever stand-up, graphic designer from Footscray, in open relationship since start of year, dated 3-4 women concurrently.

Bits:
  • Living in Collingwood makes prostate fluid come out soy or almond instead of normal.
  • Can't remember prostate color until sees 7-Eleven color chart; realizes he's very red.
Moments:
  • Confesses to being in open relationship and dating 3-4 women in first few months of year.
  • Celebrates birthday tomorrow after first stand-up performance.
9

Ellen Mahoney

Set: Ellen jokes about marrying man 12 years older, discovering daddy issues through therapy, dating app mishaps, and Grindr mix-up.

Interview: Started stand-up in May, bartender for 10 years, saw prostitute work at bar, has border collie named Ellie, slept with famous comedian.

Bits:
  • Married 12-year older man thinking it was because she was mature; therapy revealed daddy issues.
  • Date said she looked like Clint Eastwood; she still had sex with him despite poor compliment.
  • Accidentally joined Grindr (gay dating app) and guy was shocked to find she didn't have dick.
Moments:
  • Tony calls her Miss Piggy after Clint Eastwood joke, becomes running gag rest of interview.
  • Reveals she hooked up with famous American comedian (beep appears later) for whole weekend.
  • Woman from audience kisses Ellen at end of episode in crowd work moment.
10

Mark Borg

Set: Mark jokes about not knowing prime minister and proposes politicians lose a finger each time they lie.

Bits:
  • Politicians should lose a finger for each lie to give them seven chances.
Moments:
  • One of the weakest sets of the night; Tony immediately dismisses him without proper interview.
11

Ian Howlett

Set: Ian covers being parent of autistic son, school using his photo for fundraiser without permission, observational parenting humor.

Interview: 5 years experience (~20 open mikes), separated from baby mama but still living together, just started at cheese factory.

Bits:
  • Autistic son goes to LSD school (Latrobe Special Developmental); school used his photo for fundraiser.
Moments:
  • Tony praises set as example of personal observational humor vs political rants.
  • Woman from audience kisses Ian at episode end to give him first kiss in 10 years.