KILL TONY Wiki

Daniel Velasquez

🎤 3 appearancesFirst: May 29, 2023Latest: June 15, 2026

Daniel Velasquez has performed on Kill Tony 3 times. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.

Appearances

Kill Tony #773 Bucket Pull · June 15, 2026

Clean joke about friend setting up massage parlor handjob appointment during breakup, awkwardness of needing to walk home after. Self-deprecating humor about taking friend's gift.

  • Friend books handjob massage, gives sad reasons why he has to go.
  • Walk of shame silently after handjob massage is most embarrassing part.
Kill Tony #712 Bucket Pull · March 10, 2025

Velasquez joked about his mother's death and his father's poor life choices, including buying a pool table with life insurance money and dating app mishaps where he engaged with bots.

  • Dad bought orange pool table with life insurance after mom's death
  • Father got spammed by bots on dating app, wanted to date them
Kill Tony #615 Bucket Pull · May 29, 2023

Daniel, who is disabled, discusses benefits of disability, dating non-disabled women, girlfriend's nicknames for him (Speed Racer, Twin Towers), and an inappropriate sexual comment from girlfriend.

  • Being crippled allows lying; people have to believe because of disability.
  • Girlfriend calls legs 'twin towers'; wants him to fuck her so she walks with him.