Michael Schirtzer
Michael Schirtzer has performed on Kill Tony 4 times. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.
Appearances
Jokes about bombing in Afghanistan, a girl named Isis, and Matthew McConaughey smoking weed in Malibu. Set focused on Middle East politics and celebrity encounters.
- Girl named Isis gave bad oral sex, attacked his penis like terrorist
- Matthew McConaughey showed up at Malibu beach house with bottle of 151
Political one-liners about deportations, ants, and Hillary Clinton's return to the office where her husband had an affair with an intern.
- Mexican restaurant closed, staff deported, inconvenient for him.
- Hillary 2016 awkward to report to desk where husband got oral sex from intern.
Seven-month-old comic performing jokes on dead babies, gun legislation, and paraplegic comedy shows. Material was underdeveloped and rushed, delivered like reading from a script.
- Paraplegic standing comedy show can be watched in one sitting.
- Gun legislation should be written only by those who've touched the subject.
One-liners about the war on drugs, Charlie Sheen, ants, Reagan acting as president. Set bombs heavily with outdated references and weak punchlines.
- Government losing war on drugs means Charlie Sheen is winning.
- Reagan acted like the president for eight years, now people rave about his performance.