KILL TONY Wiki

Kill Tony Anthony Jeselnik, Ari Shaffir

📅 January 12, 2015 📍 Los Angeles, CA Comedy Store Belly Room 🎤 9 comedians ⭐ 2 regulars

Guests: Anthony Jeselnik · Ari Shaffir

Open on YouTube ↗

Lineup

1

Chanler Raper

Set: Critiques feel-good commercials for overweight women, argues tape measures should say degrading things instead. Makes comparison about his own weight and Blake Griffin.

Interview: Discussed his name origin, where he's from (Alabama), and his background. Panel suggested he needs a solid bit about his last name.

Bits:
  • Special K commercials show tape measures saying beautiful/strong instead of degrading things.
  • If Blake Griffin can say n-word about race, he can talk about fat people about weight.
Moments:
  • Ohio State scores during his set, Tony misses the comedy.
  • Panel heavily suggests he must do material about his last name.
2

Jeremiah

Set: Rambling set about losing friends to blown-out assets and broken wallets, babies, and biological pressure to have children. Largely improvised and forgetful.

Interview: Revealed he worked on railroads as a conductor, first time doing comedy. Panel discussed his background and encouraged him to be himself rather than memorize.

Bits:
  • When friends have kids, biological game of dodgeball starts with the fat kid dodging baby questions.
Moments:
  • Revealed as first-time comedian doing stand-up for the first time ever.
  • Panel coaches him to be himself and stop memorizing instead of performing naturally.
3

Michael Schirtzer

Set: One-liners about the war on drugs, Charlie Sheen, ants, Reagan acting as president. Set bombs heavily with outdated references and weak punchlines.

Interview: Revealed he worked in politics managing city council campaigns and claims he could've been in Congress. Panel aggressively mocked his material and attitude.

Bits:
  • Government losing war on drugs means Charlie Sheen is winning.
  • Reagan acted like the president for eight years, now people rave about his performance.
Moments:
  • Jeselnik particularly hostile, focusing on the Reagan joke being old and stale.
  • Mentions working for Jimmy Dore on political satire, audience skeptical.
4

Stretch Shp

Set: Extended riff on Waze navigation app, making jokes about police and traffic warnings. Largely padding with minimal actual jokes.

Interview: Discussed being mugged in West Hollywood in 2011 with tire iron, receiving 40 stitches. Explained his name comes from boxing/basketball reach and friend group SHP.

Bits:
  • Waze says watch out heavy traffic then good looking out ways.
  • Waze warns police ahead, good looking out Waze when smoking weed.
Moments:
  • Panel critiques that Ways joke has been done before by multiple comics.
  • Extended explanation of his multi-part stage name SHP as group/symbol.
5

Johnny Gold

Set: Dark one-liners about his father, Dick Cheney, and sexually abused women. Extremely dark material that doesn't land with the audience.

Interview: Revealed he's been doing comedy since 2002 from Riverside, owns a truck shop. Has performed locally but never made it nationally, frustrated with comedy store access.

Bits:
  • Impersonation of dad at age four: see ya.
  • Dating molested women who learned oral sex early from uncles.
Moments:
  • Jeselnik questions if topics are actually funny or if he's just saying dark things.
  • Johnny defensive about his 13-year career without major success.
  • Johnny mentions driving two hours from Riverside to perform, very dedicated.
6

Malia Sias

Set: Discusses not wanting babies, compares pregnancy to ordering pizza (guy injects, girl has to make/deliver). Lazy about motherhood, likes kids but not raising them.

Interview: From New York, transferred to LA for job, laid off fashion designer. Been doing comedy 3 years, panel suggests she dig deeper into her material.

Bits:
  • Guys inject pepperoni pizza, girls have to make/cook/deliver it and check Yelp reviews.
  • Two people create creature and shoot it out of private parts, that's a miracle.
Moments:
  • Panel notes she has good premise but needs to find what's unique about her perspective.
7

Danny Green

Set: Girlfriend dumped him for another boyfriend as Christmas surprise. Father walked in on him taking a shit, boss walked in while fucking his dad.

Interview: Started in Buffalo, moved to Charleston SC for 3 years, arrived LA in April. Struggling financially, just had funeral for grandfather, job interview upcoming.

Bits:
  • Girlfriend introduced other boyfriend on Christmas as surprise.
  • Dad walked in while taking shit, boss walked in while fucking dad.
Moments:
  • Panel impressed by his stage presence despite weak material.
8

Kim Congdon

Regular

Set: About gender inequality in dating: women called sluts for ignoring guys, men just called fathers. Jokes about equal rights but also wanting free dinner.

Interview: Dropped out of University of Florida to pursue comedy full-time after Kill Tony appearance. Does a new minute every week, writes at the last minute, very confident performer.

Bits:
  • Women ignoring men called sluts, men ignoring women just called fathers.
  • Want equal rights and free dinner from men.
Moments:
  • Panel compliments her relaxed confidence from knowing she performs new material weekly.
9

Sara Weinshenk

Regular

Set: Bought lint roller at IKEA, questions who invented it, riffs on squeak of lint roller while sitting on couch. Discusses peeling off new sheets with hope.

Interview: Panel loves her observational style about lint rollers. Discussion about lint roller quality, using cheap vs expensive ones, evolution of technology.

Bits:
  • Who invented lint roller, someone put painter's tape on a stick.
  • Loneliest part of weekend rolling lint off couch listening to squeaks.
Moments:
  • Panel highly complimentary of her observational style and performance.