Kill Tony Greg Fitzsimmons, Matt Braunger
Guests: Greg Fitzsimmons · Matt Braunger
Lineup
Set: Southern accent comedy about stereotypes, oil rig work in North Dakota, and coworkers with extra chromosomes. Material plays heavily on his accent making mundane statements funny.
Interview: Tony tests if anything sounds funny with his accent, has him recite pledge of allegiance and Godfather lines. Discussion of LA vs Mississippi, truck nuts, hunting, and guns.
- Southerners stereotyped as stupid but maybe they should be stereotyped as smart or well-endowed.
- Coworker on oil rig smoked meth for 6 years, visible extra chromosomes, dad saved him in El Camino.
- Tony has Eric recite Pledge of Allegiance with southern accent, makes it sound like he's confessing to hiding Jewish girls.
- Discussion of truck nuts leads to idea for car vaginas or boobs as promotional product.
Set: Explicit sexual humor about masturbation after 8-day break, zooming in on penis makes him think he's gay, references to his small penis and thick pubic hair.
Interview: Panel roasts his appearance, comparing him to various people and characters. Discussion of his hair, clothes, tattoos, and Twitter handle. Greg suspects he's not being authentic.
- After 8-day break from jerking off, zoom-in on penis makes him think he's gay.
- Greg accuses Michael of being inauthentic, comparing him to Larry the Cable Guy, suggesting his southern persona is an act.
- Panel discusses his physical appearance extensively, mentioning fake teeth, glasses, thick pubic hair, and comparing him to various characters.
Set: Scattered observational humor about bus fare, missing Tupac, girlfriend named Ruth becoming 'ruthless', and request to be booked. Set interrupted multiple times.
Interview: Kenny identifies as Guatemalan. Panel roasts his appearance, nipple placement, and body. Discussion of comedy shows, South Central LA where he lives, and his brothers' past abuse.
- Bought five quarters but bus machine only had four, kept walking.
- Lost girlfriend Ruth, now he's ruthless. Reference to Tupac.
- Two brothers molested him, promised gameboy but never delivered.
- Pat Reagan publicly calls out Kenny for posting hateful Facebook message saying 'Pat Reagan f*** you' and reporting him to authorities.
- Kenny gets his dreadlock hair cut on stage while performing, done by Pete Cornett from PDC.
- Panel extensively discusses Kenny's unusual body proportions, particularly his low nipples relative to his bellybutton.
Set: Self-aware comedy about privilege preventing him from commenting on controversial topics like Ferguson. Material about boat shoes, inability to have opinions on race, and vague platitudes.
Interview: Discussion of shower sharing story, chlorine and olive oil hair care, admission he sucked his own penis at age 15. Panel probes extensively about flexibility and sexual capabilities.
- Too privileged to comment on controversial topics like Ferguson with boat shoes.
- Matthew admits on air he sucked his own penis once at age 15 in guest bathroom of Cape Cod house.
- Panel gets Matthew to demonstrate or discuss his flexibility in detail, asking about positions, duration, and sensations.
- Panel makes callbacks to earlier performers, comparing Matthew's abilities to Byron Bowers' endowment.
Set: Material about performing oral sex with braces, being girls' first Asian guy, references to United Nations and China dick jokes. Heavy sexual content.
Interview: Discussion of getting braces late in life as an actor/for OCD. Mention of racing cars in Texas. Panel suggests focusing on racecar material instead of braces jokes.
- Crushing even with braces, going downtown shaved to avoid pubic hair stuck in braces.
- Been many girls' first Asian guy, feels like ambassador spreading Asian dick to world.
- Greg coaches Alex to focus on racecar material instead of braces jokes that will become dated in two weeks.
Set: Self-deprecating material about trust issues, accusing boyfriends of cheating when she has no boyfriend, observational humor about voodoo and hair playing.
Interview: Panel provides coaching on joke structure, suggesting she avoid resetting with new jokes and instead tag existing material. Discussion of keeping setup/punchlines instead of long stories.
- Thought 'friends with benefits' meant 401k.
- Has trust issues, accuses boyfriend of cheating despite not having one.
- Guy plays with her hair cute, she does it back and it's voodoo.
- Matt Braunger coaches Kim on joke structure, noting she resets every joke instead of tagging and flowing together.
Set: Material about seeing father use shoehorn, wondering why we still use medieval tool, research into shoehorns as first-class levers.
Interview: Panel discusses whether shoehorns make noise, argues about Horn of Africa geography, jokes about bra horns and camel toes.
- If you need shoehorn, just buy bigger shoes instead of using medieval tool.
- Shoehorns are first-class levers and only horn that doesn't make sound.
- Shoehorns from Middle Ages but we stopped churning butter, why keep shoehorns?
- Panel gets into debate about whether Horn of Africa is real geographical feature, Brian Redman fact-checks on Siri.
- Sara and panel discuss using horns for other articles of clothing like bra horns or car vaginas.
Set: Musical performance with emotional song about wanting a girl like his mom named Vicki Regan. Song touches on family members and relationships.
- Pat Reagan confronts Kenny Lion in front of audience about Facebook post calling Pat 'everything I hate', forces Kenny to apologize.
- Pat performs emotional original song dedicated to his mother with full band.
Interview: Greg discusses Jewish deli visit for soup when losing his voice, story about Boston mob-connected comedy club called Nicks with cops and prostitutes in back. Tells joke about two gay guys and a baby at hospital.
- Greg tells joke about two gay guys at hospital finding their baby is the only happy one because nurse removed pacifier from its ass.
Interview: Matt discusses arriving late from Jewish deli near his Venice home. Story about comedy club in Boston called Nicks with mob connections. Discussion of old jokes about fat chicks from college mullet days.
- Matt admits he used to tell fat chick jokes in college with mullet and alcohol, glad there's no video tape of it.
Interview: Willie serves as patriot in special costume with helmet and strobe lights. Panel asks about his athletic background including shotput, discus, soccer and dancing rather than competitive sports.
- Willie appears in full costume as patriot character with helmet featuring strobe lights that flash red, white and blue.