Kill Tony #361 — Jeff Ross
Guests: Jeff Ross
Lineup
Set: Alex discussed getting his booty hole eaten out, waving at Mother Nature at the ocean, and jokes about his appearance and microphone technique.
Interview: Alex is from Wisconsin, has been doing standup for 3.5 years, builds and installs Ikea kitchens, and disclosed a past relationship involving physical abuse.
- Recently had booty hole eaten out, describes it as wonderful
- Waved at Mother Nature at ocean, she didn't wave back
- Tony and panel critique his microphone technique throughout interview
- Uncomfortable moment when asked about physical abuse from ex-girlfriend
Set: Zach did a warm-up about multitasking and his mom, discussed growing up poor in a fraternity for financial aid students (EBT letters), and his appearance.
Interview: From Fayetteville, North Carolina, been doing standup 3 years, bartends at craft beer bar in Burbank, lives with roommates, into skateboarding, dated girl who moved to Santa Monica with him but relationship ended when he started doing comedy.
- Conflicted about roadhead multitasking while giving mom rides to work
- Grew up poor in financial aid fraternity with EBT letters
- Looks like John Benet Ramsey's killer, dad asks about hair
- Comparison to David Lee Roth noted by panel
- Tony praises his joke execution compared to first comic
Set: Lorraine discussed not knowing she was Mexican until older (thought she was good swimmer), being in a failed 3-year relationship where her ex was likely gay and preferred anal sex.
Interview: From Rancho Cucamonga, been doing comedy just over a year after bad breakup, works as a bartender, ex-boyfriend gave lap dances at gay bar and made her wear baseball cap during sex.
- Thought grandparents swimming across border meant she was good swimmer
- Not typical Mexican, no kids, should be great-grandmother by now
- Ex-boyfriend preferred anal sex, always wore baseball cap during intimacy
- Extended discussion about ex-boyfriend's sexuality and sexual preferences
- Panel discovers ex was secretly dating another woman for 5+ years also
- Jeff Ross praises her for personal material rather than generic jokes
Seth
Set: Seth did jokes about being non-threatening despite face tattoos, women locking car doors after dates, and disclosed he's Mormon with three kids, two daughters with bleeding disorder.
Interview: Mormon, married with three kids aged 7, 4, and 9 months, two daughters have bleeding disorder (Von Willebrand), wife teaches at USC, been doing standup 1.5 years, disclosed worst moment: lifted disabled person in wheelchair for spanking at age 17.
- Non-threatening guy but women lock doors when he drops them off
- Claims he's never raped anybody despite his appearance
- Got married as a virgin, perfect way to end
- Disclosed traumatic story about disabled person asking him to assist in spanking
- Panel discusses implications of his daughters having bleeding disorder during menstruation
- Tony praises Seth for improvement across multiple appearances
Set: Jason discussed having narcolepsy with cataplexy, growing up in cult-like upbringing (Mormon light), and being in circus tents for gatherings.
Interview: Third appearance, disabled veteran living in van, served in Coast Guard as mechanic deployed to Guantanamo, boating accident caused back/sciatica issues, been homeless/living in van since October, discusses mental health and suicide ideation.
- Has narcolepsy and cataplexy but never experienced joy to faint
- Mormon light upbringing with number two circus tent for gatherings
- Discloses friend's suicide in high school, had unrequited crush on her
- References three-layer wipe technique for toilet paper
- Tony coaches him to focus on writing and improve
Set: Nico joked about being Jewish and white, having privilege, breakups feeling like leaving prison, friend asking if he was glad weed was legal.
Interview: 23 years old from Claremont, just graduated college, going to law school studying cannabis law, parents are real estate attorneys paying for apartment, hosts Legion of Skanks part-time, lives with parents, has girlfriend who splits comedy show earnings.
- Jewish with white privilege, friends say weed always been legal for us
- Breakups like leaving prison, freedom nice but miss the sex
- Reveals girlfriend makes him split earnings from comedy shows featuring her
- Jeff observes he looks like uncircumcised penis
- Panel discusses his plan to follow girlfriend to law school
Set: William did absurdist material about Tim Tebow doing cocaine off table, owning streaming diamonds website with Ernest movies, plastic containers stolen from mailbox, impression of living in Philippines.
Interview: 43 years old, claims to have worked with Jeff Ross on films in Philippines for 4 years, got malaria, worked at Laser Quest, mentions various fabricated shared experiences with Jeff including 1996 Olympics pipe bombs and plane incident.
- If Tim Tebow still played NFL, found self doing cocaine off table
- Website streaming diamonds like Netflix but only Ernest movies
- Impression of self in Philippines with darkened skin for comedic effect
- Entire interview based on elaborate false stories with Jeff Ross about past experiences
- William directs message to heckler Paul at self-storage unit about his health
- Tony checks that image on screen is not actually his parents' house
Set: Danny joked about old people's reaction to seeing him, roommate thinking Jesus was magician because he prayed for rent money instead of working.
Interview: 25 years old, moved to LA 2 years ago from North Carolina, was homeless for 3 months after arriving with dog Stitch, recently started standup 2 weeks ago, works delivery for Amazon, has been attending open mics 3-4 times weekly.
- Old people give him expression like watching shooting star when seeing him
- Roommate prayed for rent instead of getting job, thought Jesus was magician
- Reveals dog Stitch died while in care of friend who wouldn't return him
- Tony coaches him to write jokes about his dog's death experience
- Fake phone call to dog Stitch at end of interview
Set: Cassandra introduced giant vagina costume, joked about dating comedians, having to pretend they're funnier, picking up checks because they have no money.
Interview: Performs burlesque for 20 years traveling worldwide, dating comedian Cole Alexander, recently filming Netflix show in pre-production, friends with David Arquette for wrestling, responds to Cole's previous episode's comments about their relationship.
- Introduced vagina costume, warns not to get close to two bomber comedians
- Has to pretend comedian boyfriend funnier than her, pick up checks
- Cole Alexander called to stage to publicly apologize for previous episode's characterization
- Cassandra corrects Cole's version of their relationship on air
- Episode ends with Cole and Cassandra kissing on stage