William Montgomery

No set recap for this appearance.

Rapid-fire jokes spanning Yoko Ono, Fred Flintstone, Miss Cleo, and Aphex Twin. Set covers pop culture references and concludes with a Rickroll-style punchline.

• Yoko Ono's songs explained by suggesting John Lennon was gay based on song titles.
• Aphex Twin's real name Richard D. James means he says 'It's Rick James, bitch' on stage.

Stand-up about Redban's mom, Ozempic, two fat people, Aphex Twin, Jesse Jackson, and Chat GPT.

• Redban's mom so fat, now there's an Ozempic shortage.
• Two clinically obese people discussing if town is big enough for both.

Discusses spam emails, Epstein, stolen Razor scooter in Tucson, missing Blippi host, Capitol storming over Blue's Clues. Absurdist observational humor.

• Epstein had zero spam emails while he gets Viagra
• Blippi host replacement unexplained while Blue's Clues hosted Capitol storming

Opening set with absurdist jokes about Epstein list rumors, Redband, vacuum cleaner sex arrest, bong collection appraisal refusal, and Ax Twin Spotify listeners.

• Epstein's assistant asked about inviting Brian Riel to island party; Epstein said Red man might frighten kids.
• Man arrested for sex with vacuum cleaner says 'my balls are gone, got banned from Antiques Road Show for bong collection death threats.'
• Ax Twin has more YouTube listeners than Taylor Swift; which twin is it.

Opens with doxing joke misdirection, catfish joke with waiter, flat-earther depression suicide paradox joke proving earth is round.

• Doxing misdirection: thinking it's two guys punching with dicks
• Catfished by amberjack fish with whiskers at restaurant
• Depressed flat-earther walks around world, shows up in hot air balloon proving earth round

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William opened by saying he looks like the love child of Triple H and Carrot Top after steroids, congratulated Cam Patterson for joining SNL (questioning how SNL didn't see problematic Kill Tony clips), joked about Red Band waiting for Gong Show callback.

• Looks like Triple H and Carrot Top love child after steroid-fueled night
• Questions how SNL didn't see Cam Patterson screaming n-word on Kill Tony before hiring

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William discusses wiping his butt after peeing, jokes about 'my dog saved me' people actually stealing Lassie, Sesame Street puppets celebrating Pride Month and having anuses, ordering coffee variations, and references Aphex Twin.

• Wiping butt after peeing; not the same as other men
• Dog saved me people actually stole Lassie
• Sesame Street puppets celebrating Pride Month; didn't know puppets had anuses

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Montgomery performed rapid-fire topical jokes: Diddy/Afrika comparisons, Daft Punk French robot stereotypes, marijuana ban in Texas, egg prices and girlfriend selling jokes.

• Osama bin Laden's pornos were actually Diddy and Afrika videos
• Daft Punk French robots: smoke cigarettes and cheat on wives
• Egg prices so high he's selling his girlfriend

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Montgomery opened with observations about self-partnered identity, divorced remarriages, and impressions of Danny Glover. He discussed his rowing machine routine and health metrics.

• Self-partnered identity compared to masturbation in high school
• Divorced women repeatedly remarrying and attending rehearsals

No set recap for this appearance.

Opening about fertility clinic lawsuit and reverse situation with his mother; political jokes about Eric Swalwell and Hillary Clinton; jokes about Hooters bankruptcy.

• White woman sues fertility clinic for black baby; his mom had opposite problem
• Hooters bankruptcy filing options: chapter 7, 11, or 36 double D

President's Day joke about kneeling toward Washington Monument, Cliffhanger prequel volcano/mountain joke, Elon Musk/Social Security age joke, Germany hate speech irony.

• Ramp up President's Day; kneel on rugs facing Washington Monument
• Cliffhanger prequel with volcano; mountains created for cliff-hanging
• Elon says millions on Social Security are 150-360 years old; Red Band's mom joke

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Jokes about Pfizer, COVID vaccines, and personal isolation during Me Too movement. Self-deprecating material about not interacting with women.

• Pfizer releases new COVID scene with YouTube album in syringe
• Being locked up at Riker's Island on 9/11 compared to Me Too survival
• Only talked to four girls including mom, didn't survive Me Too

Montgomery opened with observational humor about his Spotify stats, UnitedHealthcare CEO, and a cancelled bar mitzvah. Mix of dark comedy and mundane complaints.

• Spotify rap shows top song was crop dusting funeral home visitations
• UnitedHealthcare CEO shooter caught at McDonald's meeting Hamburglar

No set recap for this appearance.

William did topical material about Whoopi Goldberg, Trump election, and Liam Payne's death. Short punchy one-liners and observational humor with political references.

• Whoopi refusing sex with Trump elected; he also refusing to have sex with her.
• Liam Payne jumped off balcony; One Direction pun about going straight down.
• Oregon official suspended for hiring on qualifications not sexual orientation.

Topical jokes about Jake Paul/Mike Tyson fight and Netflix event, alien impression asking for headache medicine, Boeing building Santa's sleigh joke.

• Jake Paul has Netflix event scheduled; May 1-on-1 basketball with Kobe Bryant.
• Alien impression asking doctor about headache; doesn't know human terminology.
• Heard Santa coming early; bad news Boeing built his sleigh.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Topical material about Tony's Trump rally jokes, assassination attempt on Trump, and random Pope joke about Red Sea. Strong material addressing Tony directly.

• Trump wishing he'd been shot in other ear after Tony's jokes.
• Random Pope joke about parting the Red Sea.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Sat on the panel this episode.

Riffs on Delta Airlines gender-neutral announcements, Kamala Harris's fake laugh, pickup lines, and rigor mortis.

• Delta should worry about flights being late, not his dick
• Kamala Harris is bad at fake laughing

Sat on the panel this episode.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William discusses 2024 presidential debate, Biden's six handicap/stage six dementia claim, 72% poll on cognitive impairment vs 28% thinking he's dead, Kim Foxx Big Gulp incident, golf arguments.

• Biden six handicap golf/stage six dementia; 72% said cognitive impairment, 28% thought he was dead.
• In Kim Foxx poll after Big Gulp thrown on her, one poll choice was 'man, I thought that old ass man was dead'.

William performs about Jesus 2024 candidate, barbecued human flesh, Wales jailing lying politicians, presidential debate loser with Hillary Clinton. Closes with Tennessee baseball vs Texas A&M shout-out.

• Jesus 2024 campaign, liberals want to see birth certificate
• Massachusetts man serving barbecued human flesh, what were wine pairings
• Wales jailing lying politicians means shutting down government

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William opened with slavery joke, Iran's president helicopter crash mechanic joke, Lizzo and anti-Israel activists joke, and Red Band's mom herpes gene therapy joke.

• 12 Years a Slave light sentence compared to slavery
• Iran's president helicopter crashed, mechanic out of gas
• Gene therapy kills herpes, open season on Red Band's mom

No set recap for this appearance.

Sat on the panel this episode.

William discusses Iranian rapper sentenced to death, RedBand manatee joke, Jim Jones using Flavor Aid instead of Kool Aid for deaths.

• Iranian rapper sentenced to death for anti-government lyrics
• Jim Jones used Flavor Aid not Kool Aid for poisoning

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William jokes about eclipse caused by Lizzo blocking the sun, climate change and eclipses, tells story about encountering jihadi in Afghanistan who offered nicotine lozenge instead of executing him, introduces him as Zen Laden.

• Eclipse caused by Lizzo walking in front of the sun
• Jihadi offers nicotine lozenge instead of shooting; introduces self as Zen Laden

No set recap for this appearance.

William Montgomery mentioned briefly in Casey Rocket interview as having done road shows in Tacoma, Washington with Casey.

William opened with jokes about Tucker Carlson, Biden, Hunter Biden, Boeing whistleblower conspiracy theories, and closed with tight dark political material.

• Biden cares more about Ukraine than US, no dog video of Hunter
• Boeing whistleblower death question: Boeing or Hillary Clinton Airlines

William Montgomery, a Kill Tony hall of famer and regular, performs about Alec Baldwin's gun mishaps with nuclear weapons, a mother jailed for child labor in waxing, and includes a dark joke about roofying.

• Alec Baldwin joke about nuclear weapons based on his gun mishap.

Set about homophobic dog, Alexei Navalny death and Hillary Clinton joke, Aaliyah plane crash and Ghost Ride the Whip reference.

• Dog refuses to go to San Francisco, says euthanize me instead of breed.
• Alexi Navalny death from sudden death syndrome, Hillary Clinton reference.
• Aaliyah plane crash caused by Ghost Ride the Whip.

No set recap for this appearance.

Regular closing the show, President's Day set mixing Warren G. Harding, California border wall, Gavin Newsom kicking Tony out, Honda Accord roast, CIA PTO.

• Every day is President's Day at my house, no special sale needed
• California border wall, Gavin Newsom kicked Tony out as revolutionary talent
• Driver of 2003 Honda Accord, car is busted as fuck

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William performs political commentary on Bill Clinton in metaverse, Indian CEO wire death, silence/violence, and desire to fuck homeless.

• British police investigating metaverse rape; Bill Clinton too fat to fit in.
• Indian CEO's turban didn't break fall from snapped wire during ceremony.
• Silence is violence true; wishes dad gave him silent treatment instead.

William opens with dark jokes about an elderly couple dying from a faulty meter reaching 1,000 degrees (good because their utility bill would be expensive). He makes jokes about Stephen Hawking and Jeffrey Epstein, AIDS, and gaydar.

• Elderly couple dead from 1,000-degree meter, good because utility bill would be brutal
• Stephen Hawking on Epstein list, couldn't function sexually but needs touching

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Kill Tony Hall of Fame regular returns with material about Neo-Nazis, shampoo, Shazamed Harry Styles, Red Band appearance, Trump's sister Maryann death, Apex Twin Grammy nomination.

• Difference between Neo-Nazi and Free Palestine activist: shampoo
• Shazamed Harry Styles song at coffee shop, extremely disappointed
• Trump's sister Maryann dead at 86; she helped Donald with college

Alaskan Airlines pilot on mushrooms trying to shut down engines, definition of girl boss, waiting for 36 Mafia FBI indictment.

• Pilot high on mushrooms tried shutting off plane engines mid-flight
• Webster's added girl boss but probably called raging bitch by everyone else

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Started church where gay people allowed but must wear tie, 25% statistic incomplete joke, story about managing hotel after discovering no staff, confession about selling employee Xanax out of hotel room 217, jokes about Hasan Minaj lying about racism experiences and questioning Russell Brand rape allegations.

• Started church, gay people allowed but they have to tie
• Buddies managed hotel for hours after no staff found, sold Xanax
• Hasan Minaj lies about racism, questioning Russell Brand allegations

William delivered topical material about Barack Obama being bisexual, Russian opposition, Captain D's vs Long John Silvers, earthquake in Morocco, Trump, and MJ baseball analogy.

• Barack Obama bisexual; Russian opposition leader may still be alive.
• Captain D's and Long John Silver's still haven't settled fish fry nuggets.
• Earthquake rocks Morocco back to stone age; no damage.

Multiple strong minutes about gender labor, global warming/Mitch McConnell freezing, John Fetterman golf strokes, term/age/stroke limits, Hurricane Mohammed in Mid Atlantic hitting 'tall buildings mostly of twin variety.'

• Republicans favor global warming hoping to keep Mitch McConnell unfrozen.
• Hurricane Mohammed hard to predict path but expect tall twin buildings.

William does topical minute about Jenny Provan plane crash, Steve Harvey affair rumors, Bob Barker's cremation and tanning bed joke.

• Bob Barker cremated, only need to turn tanning bed up 10 degrees
• Steve Harvey's wife affair with chef, he won't fire him

William delivers observational material about Hurricane Hillary and its death toll, anteater jokes, and closes with a children's book concept about David Koechner having a large penis ('The David Kecner Story'). High-energy performance with multiple callbacks.

• Hurricane Hillary killed more people than the actual storm
• Anteater is named after what it eats
• Children's book about David Koechner's large penis in third grade

William did a 60-second set about credit scores and loan applications, Tommy the pinball wizard joke, Super Bowl/Lizzo joke about obesity.

• No credit score, tell them to control-alt-delete for financing
• Tommy was pinball wizard with two arms not blind

Opening jokes about protesting at gay wedding with congregation. Biden and Hunter corruption jokes. Trudeau divorce joke. Post Malone strip club/Hunter Biden comparison. Heavy political and current events material.

• Protested outside gay wedding with members of his congregation.
• Biden knew about Hunter's business, eventually about crack cocaine.
• Trudeau's wife doesn't like black guys after split.

William performs absurdist jokes: homeless woman killed by tractor at winery; warehouse turned out to be illegal Chinese virus lab; Apex Twins EP only has 4 songs.

• Warehouse in California illegal Chinese virus lab; Apex Twins EP only has 4 songs.

William, returning after Hawaii, performs about the Carly Russell kidnapping, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles absurdist logic, and Master Shredder funding conspiracy. High-energy with strong punchlines.

• Carly Russell case: William was balding orange-headed man who kidnapped her (not a joke).
• TMNT weird because turtles are ninjas, protagonist is plumber, sibling also plumber.
• Master Shredder gets funding from George Soros; TMNT in sewers suspicious.

Jokes about White House cocaine, Juneteenth as white invasion day, Pete Davidson rehab, celebrity dating history, doubting moon landing, Knots Landing reference, and father giving him shovel at age 5.

• Pete Davidson rehab for PTSD from dating Ariana Grande and Kardashians
• Father gave him shovel at age 5 after telling him about death
• Questions moon landing credibility, also questions Knots Landing TV show

William Montgomery performed about the Pledge of Allegiance with crude additions, Uber drivers with AC, deceased NFL quarterback Ryan Mallett drowning, and his basketball aspirations.

• Modified Pledge of Allegiance with references to Red Band's mom and Denny's sex.
• Obese Uber drivers have AC cranked because their asses are hot.
• Ryan Mallett drowned in Panama City, thought he told others to go deep.

Meta-jokes about table of contents in books, Schindler's List being too long (dark joke about 7 million people), one-armed rock climber observation. Strong regular performance.

• Authors listing dedications instead of getting to good content
• Schindler's List too long, could have been 7 million people long
• One-armed girl walked out gym, wondered about Red Band's excuse

William performs jokes about meeting haters at age three at Silver Springs, a submarine missing tourists, Titanic trutherism, and an Arizona bear attack with commentary on aggression.

• Worst thing: meeting haters at age three; submarine tourists story references Red Band's mother.
• Considering Titanic truther; iceberg hard to avoid in big ocean, argues unprovoked bear attack was stupidity.

William performed material about his appearance, his parents' traits, anti-immigration Saudi golf rule jokes, and Donald Trump classified documents parody.

• Has mother's chin and father's testicles; Dad always saying 'make Germany great again'.
• Saudi golf rules: miss putt = 10 years jail; migrant worker violations; ball out of bounds = wife stoned.
• Trump parody about being charged while only Aphex Twin should be for performing in Denmark not America.

William performs about PGA/Saudi Arabia merger and building planes, Indian name coincidence, homophobia and toothbrushes, pitching large psychic TV show, comparing himself to Jesus with disciples, reflecting on Kill Tony history.

• Saudi Arabia owns PGA tour; can crash planes anytime
• Pitching large medium TV show about fat psychic
• Looks like Jesus if disciples were the answer

William discusses dogs identifying as cats at vet office, a dog's last meal being Jordan sneakers, horses on board of directors that only neigh (never vote yay), and a steroid-enhanced horse that set home run records.

• Dogs identifying as cats at vet office; outrageous trend.
• Horse board of directors only neigh, never vote yay.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William does absurdist observational comedy about Long John Silver vs Captain D's, girlfriend Ricky Williams armpit reference, and performs an original keyboard song about Mother's Day lasagna he made. Playful and creative.

• Wondering which came first Long John Silver's or Captain D's atomic bomb reference
• When girlfriend calls bedroom Ricky Williams armpit, you know you got problems

William opened with a joke about Princess Diana not aging much since King Charles' coronation. He discussed Robert F. Kennedy Jr. surging in polls and made jokes about a Sleepless in Seattle remake and Ted Lasso as a public service announcement.

• Princess Diana hasn't aged much since King Charles' coronation.
• New Sleepless in Seattle sequel with Tom Hanks transitioned as female, called 'Fucked in Seattle.'

Vermont school using 'person who produces sperm' instead of boy, You've Got Mail sequel with trans man, Epstein calendar with CIA director and Noam Chomsky, Apex Twin reference. Ends with song about new dog Gator.

• Vermont school says person who produces sperm instead of boy
• You've Got Mail sequel with trans man becomes You've Got Male
• Epstein calendar has CIA director, Noam Chomsky, and Apex Twin

William performs extended synthesizer set with political commentary about Biden, SpaceX explosion, his past drinking, Forensic Files Australian confusion, and women in sports. Set showcases musical and comedic range.

• Watched Forensic Files halfway through, realized entire episode was Australian
• Rapid unscheduled disassembly: SpaceX rocket term; also applies to drunk driving crash

William closed with sharp jokes about LGBTQ+ flag letters as WiFi passwords, Steve Irwin's death, Shark Tank with real sharks, and over-the-counter Narcan. Polished, smart comedy delivered with note cards.

• LGBTQ+ new letter/symbol is just a confusing WiFi password.
• Shark Tank but with real sharks and water tank.

Jokes about dog sex as news, Vatican letter joke with Red Band's mom reference, Cleveland Indians name change, weight loss and death risks joke, Red Band life expectancy joke.

• Vatican asks for resume after Dalai Lama tongue incident
• Weight loss increases death risk, Red Band's life expectancy is 70 years

William opens with joke about Bud Light featuring trans person on cans because they're tired of selling beer. Makes joke about feminine hygiene company wanting his image on dental dams. Then discusses Trump's arrest/fingerprinting and Aphex Twin at King Charles coronation.

• Bud Light hiring trans spokesperson because they're tired of selling beer, not to be outdone.
• Tinder's new spokesperson is Ted Bundy.
• Trump got arrested with mug shots and anal cavity search which found Aphex Twin performs at coronation.

William opens complaining about purple-haired freaks and pronouns, mothers wanting him to date Anne of Green Gables, has a girlfriend from 'electric cheetah' strip club, discusses California banning Skittles, finds fortune cookie joke about Red Band joining the Confederates.

• Didn't download Oregon Trail and lose family to dysentery to have pronouns complaints
• California trying to ban Skittles, might as well ban water, loves Skittles
• Fortune cookie has joke about Red Band being so old, told him join Confederates

New minute about gaining weight for The Whale audition, Gotham City villains in costumes, Mr. Penguin questions, Shark Tank pitch for kids needing adoption, Flowbee hair cutting vacuum attachment purchase.

• Shark Tank but for kids trying to get adopted
• Flowbee vacuum attachment for cutting hair while cleaning

No set recap for this appearance.

William performed about trying to kill Tom Arnold, his wrestling finishing move the crop duster, horses and abortion access, wanting action movies with fat black women heroes.

• Tried to kill Tom Arnold, wrestling finishing move called the crop duster
• CDC study says ejaculate 26 times monthly for health, Red Band must be healthiest

No set recap for this appearance.

William covers news topics rapidly: Grover Cleveland golf tournament, Tiger Woods tampon joke about periods, XFL teams with creative names, and Palestine train crash.

• Tiger Woods gave tampon to guy he outdrove, men have periods now in 2023
• XFL teams with Masters of Universe villains names like Sea Dragons and Roughnecks

Rapid-fire topical jokes: three rappers found dead, Biden, gentrification, fortune cookies. Red Band roast jokes on AM radio porn and gluten-free.

• Three rappers found dead in Michigan, won't let son become rapper
• Nothing gets him hard like gentrifying Head Start sinners
• Million year old brain found in England is Biden traveling UK

William read fortune cookie jokes about Biden's administration women, giving himself oral sex, and unattractive people wearing masks. Creative delivery method using cookies.

• Biden said half women in administration are women, have you seen them
• Taught himself to give himself oral sex by giving girlfriend advice
• Bought hippo thinking it stays bathtub size; Petco scammed him

No set recap for this appearance.

Regular/headliner. Memphis native angered by Prince Harry calling Graceland a dump. Jokes comparing Elvis and Harry's trajectories, badger dens, attacking Prince Harry throughout.

• Elvis went from bottom to top; Prince Harry went from top to bottom.
• Badger dens are nice; uses badger-den app weekly and booked some.

William performs topical material about Yeti Airlines crash with dark humor, Biden classified documents, Masters Golf Tournament renaming, and Houston's restaurant.

• Yeti Airlines crash—bad news everyone dead, good news beer still cold
• Biden classified documents found in depends bag
• Masters Golf Tournament renamed to 'the human traffickers'

William joked about pyramid schemes, Whitney Houston movie quality, Southwest Airlines Spirit Airlines name change, catching touchdowns, choking girlfriend, and Chris Beard basketball coach controversy.

• Pyramid scheme joke opening, Southwest Airlines Spirit Airlines rebrand
• Whitney Houston movie awful, body found in Beverly Hilton
• When I catch touchdown, other receiver to get pantomime paddles shock me

Jeremy Renner snowplow accident, not getting Gary Glitter biopic role, executed murderer's last meal (cholesterol jokes), Barbara Walters and Pope Benedict greeting him in hell.

• Jeremy Renner in critical condition from snowplow, thought he was a superhero
• Executed murderer ate fried pork chops, at least he'll be full entering hell with Barbara Walters

William performs a tight set about going as Frosty the Snowman for Christmas, double-teaming someone's wife with Frosty, Billy Crystal's wife getting pneumonia, Frosty's pronouns, and why Frosty melted (Aphex Twin mixtape).

• Going as Frosty the Snowman; double-teaming Frosty with someone's wife creates strong bonds.
• Frosty's pronouns are he/him unless in Dominican Republic, then LL Coool.
• Frosty melted because Santa brought him Aphex Twin mixtape and he finally listened.

William Montgomery opened with topical jokes about World Cup journalism deaths, the Brittany Greiner prisoner swap using crude political humor, and a Price is Right showcase joke about incongruous prize combinations.

• Brittany Greiner prisoner swap checks three political boxes: tall, like cereal, enjoys music
• Price is Right showcase with mismatched prizes: gym, Kate Spade, Aphex Twin album

New minute about Gene Simmons being dead for 10 years but people don't notice because of makeup, Oxford Dictionary's 'Goblin mode' word of the year, and jokes about putting on best clothes to 'gobble up that [ __ ]'. Admits being sick from casino super-spreader event.

• Gene Simmons dead 10 years but makeup hides it; nobody notices with Kiss makeup
• Oxford's Goblin mode means putting on best clothes to 'gobble up that [ ]'

William does rapid-fire topical one-liners about penis pills, monkeypox renaming, Saudi Arabia journalism, climate reparations, released sex offenders, and Cyber Monday ending with a joke about uncle incest.

• Penis pills made his penis shrink by 2 inches from already tiny size
• Monkeypox renaming to '[ __ ] blisters' by WHO; acknowledges it sounds offensive
• Saudi Arabia winning World Cup means beheading journalists like Jamal Khashoggi

William performs topical material on Red Scare podcast, Green Power Ranger death conspiracy, Herschel Walker election, Cormac McCarthy reading, and Chili's bathroom advances on Jay Leno.

• Green Power Ranger detonated bomb vest in Pakistan village
• Herschel Walker should've let illegitimate children be born for election

William performs seasonal material about exit polls asking Black people insensitive questions, then pivots to Jay Leno's car fire accident and Stevo's burned face reaction.

• Exit polls asking Black voters insensitive questions about basketball and hair touching
• Jay Leno burned in car fire while listening to Aphex Twin mixtape

William performs material about Dog the Bounty Hunter recognizing him in Hawaii, Texas losing to Sandy Hook parents in a lawsuit, and Biden telling someone nobody fucks with a Biden unless you're Hunter.

• Good news: recognized in Hawaii. Bad news: by Dog Bounty Hunter
• Texas football so bad Sandy Hook parents suing for 2.5 trillion
• Biden about nobody fucking with Biden unless you're Hunter Biden

William opened with joke about bodies in Lake Mead being shitty comics, Taylor Swift writing breakup songs about him, her blackface bedroom fetish, and Shrek likely rejecting Jesus's teachings.

• Bodies found in Lake Mead are shitty comics; Taylor Swift writes more breakup songs
• Taylor did blackface in bedroom as fetish; made him call her Lawrence Taylor
• Shrek rejects Jesus teachings in DreamWorks universe—proof he's in hell

William performs multiple quick jokes: festival honoring Red Band's mom, incels moving to Castlevania if Trump wins, NASCAR driver Kurt Busch sensitivity training, decorative rapper confusion, unclear character bit, complaint about not being on official lineup.

• Skank Fest festival organized in honor of Red Band's mom
• Incels say they move to Castlevania if Trump wins
• NASCAR driver Kurt Busch sensitivity training for calling guy a dumbass

William discusses starting a bottled water company sourcing from Camp Lejeune, Marjorie Taylor Greene's divorce and children, comments about the movie Bros and comparing it to Westboro Baptist Church.

• Started bottled water company sourcing from Camp Lejeune, referencing contamination scandal.
• Movie Bros so bad it made him join Westboro Baptist Church, reversing support for gay rights.

William performs strong close with multiple minutes about Rosh Hashanah, abortion documentaries, NCIS pronunciation, Roger Waters/Pink Floyd, and cousin incest.

• Rosh Hashanah and Red Band's Jewish identity; wishes him happy new year
• Sundance Film Festival three abortion films; two unborn children harmed in making
• Roger Waters angry Aphex Twin not real musician despite pro-Russia stances

Strong minute of news-based jokes about Beyond Meat CEO eating meat after accident, hurricane Puerto Rico, Red Band's mom on diet pills, Alex Jones, and Ricky Martin. Rapid-fire topical material with strong callbacks.

• Beyond Meat CEO bit off after car accident, proving nose meat beats Beyond Meat
• Red Band's mom discovering vodka and diet pills, devastating blackout reference
• Alex Jones unhinged, questioning frog sexuality is mild compared
• Ricky Martin made 12-year-old nephew strip and dance in rain then assaulted

William delivers hard-hitting dark comedy about 9 migrants dying in Rio Grande (Red Band guard reference), watching The Godfather for the first time, The Little Mermaid remake with OJ Simpson as Prince Eric, Queen Elizabeth's death and Prince Andrew scandals.

• Nine migrants died in Rio Grande; Red Band was a guard whispering 'hurry this shit up.'
• Little Mermaid remake with Black actress, concerning that Prince Eric is OJ Simpson.
• Queen Elizabeth found dead; must have had video of Prince Andrew with 12-year-old.

William performs jokes about Brittany Greiner's Russian prison sentence, Biden's student loan forgiveness, robbing Kmart for medical school, fiber optic internet, and Gustavo Arnold's death.

• Brittany Greiner had to go to Russia for 9-year sentence from man.
• Robbed Kmart parking lot for medical school instead of using loans.
• Hooked dick up to fiber optic internet; came in seconds.

No set recap for this appearance.

William's quick-hit joke style mixes setup with hidden punchlines: Supreme Court reference, Ellen DeGeneres dead girlfriend Anne Heche car crash, ghost voting Biden 4x, Jeffrey Epstein Prince Andrew.

• Supreme court vs Supreme's court (band); baby love callback.
• Ellen DeGeneres girlfriend Anne Hesch died in car crash; Ellen taking it hard.
• Ghost discovers he voted for Biden 4 times; that means assassins coming.
• Epstein calling Prince Andrew from prison about non-existent minors.

William does rapid-fire jokes about Nancy Pelosi, Kim Kardashian, the Yulin dog festival, and Elizabeth Warren, with provocative edgy content.

• Nancy Pelosi's breasts referenced multiple times with pornhub.
• Yulin festival dinner comparison to red band's mom.

Stand-up set featuring jokes about Alex Jones' bankruptcy, Olivia Newton-John's death, Taylor Swift's private jet usage, and Elon Musk sending flowers to his girlfriend. William struggled with opening lines and closing transitions.

• Alex Jones owes 40 million, roughly $5 per fake Holocaust victim
• Taylor Swift's jet loaned out more than Red Band's mom

William jokes about losing Adidas sponsorship, becoming sexual preference developer (WG=wiener grabber), adds LGBTWG to acronym, discusses Shark Week attractions.

• Developed WG sexual preference code: wiener grabber, expanded LGBTWG
• Red Band's mom so fat, instead LGBT she's TCBY
• Shark Week has boats, sunburns, bathing suits, shirtless cameramen, Miami

William delivers a set of observational jokes about women's abortion protest sex strike, Arch Manning/Peyton Manning comparison, Green Day and Billy Joe Armstrong, Gatorade bottle downsizing, and Red Band's elderly mother.

• Women protesting abortion ruling refuse sex with men; he refuses to be in Hootie and the Blowfish.
• Arch Manning committed to Texas; next question is which defensive player will he lose the Heisman to.

William performs material about mermaiding trend, having dated a mermaid who laid eggs in bathtub while he peed on them. Makes jokes comparing Ariel/Prince Eric to Red Band's mom, Hunter Biden's confusion about Russia vs Ukraine, and other absurdist humor.

• Dated mermaid who laid eggs in bathtub, he peed on them for five years.
• Ariel and Red Band's mom both got railed by Prince Eric in 1989.
• Hunter Biden confused about Russia vs Ukraine due to dating prostitutes from both.

Long-standing Kill Tony regular delivers extended political parody about running for county alderman with absurdist policies about Halloween, Frosty, Japanese furniture, and various community issues.

• Mud pit childhood story leads to 'Old Stone Face' nickname and political platform.
• Policy to eliminate Frosty the Snowman and Halloween from American television.

William opened by noting his 'parents' last week were actors, joked about Juneteenth to Hispanic audience, made R. Kelly age jokes about young waitresses at Chuck E. Cheese, confused a rainbow waffle flag as Ukrainian, and did Billy Ocean 'kidnapping' jokes.

• R. Kelly wrote 'Age Ain't Nothing But A Number' about young waitress at Chuck E. Cheese.
• Billy Ocean wrote 'Get Out Of My Dreams' about kidnapping young waitress at Chuck E. Cheese.
• Dad confused rainbow waffle iron pattern with Ukrainian flag due to current events.

Lengthy 2+ minute set with parents on stage. Topics: Capitol riot (storming Capitol on Jan 6 with parents, reaching Nancy Pelosi's office), baby formula shortage and tampon shortage (use extra diapers as tampons), toothpaste claiming to take 10 years off.

• Stormed Capitol with parents, made it to Nancy Pelosi's office, was warm inside.
• Baby formula shortage, tampon shortage; use extra diapers as tampons after starvation.
• Toothpaste claims to take 10 years off life; no way getting that.

William Montgomery performed his weekly set with multiple jokes about Queen Elizabeth's 70-year reign, references to Pauly Shore films, Red Band's mother, Bill Clinton's adviser Mark Middleton's suspicious death, and Jeffrey Epstein.

• Queen's 70-year reign; Red Band's mom's legs numb after 45 minutes
• Brendan Fraser in Encino Man reference to Red Band's mother
• Bill Clinton adviser Mark Middleton hanging death with shotgun and Aphex Twin

William performs material about Red Band's mother, Hurricane Agatha, Nancy Pelosi's husband DUI, and Vladimir Putin's health/cancer, with dark jokes and sarcastic callbacks to Kill Tony running jokes.

• Red Band's mom voted off Naked and Afraid reality show
• Nancy Pelosi's husband and Red Band's mom both got DUIs in Napa
• Vladimir Putin shaking because he listened to Aphex Twin

William opens with girlfriend breakup text, references Dash from Incredibles as description of audience member, jokes about Forensic Files dentist misunderstanding, and monkeypox spread at music festival.

• Girlfriend broke up via text, opening for Dash from Incredibles grown up and joined Aryan Nation
• Forensic Files dental student ate chalk and played in ball pit at 17
• Old woman at Belgium music festival spread monkeypox, Red Band's mom involved

William performs absurdist jokes about abortions, Amber Heard/Johnny Depp, Hunter Biden's laptop, Noah's Ark, and marching bands. Second part mixes random non-sequiturs with dark references to shooting people in Memphis, Phoenix, Dallas, Oklahoma City.

• Abortion joke extended through multiple premises and doctors
• Marching band skipped leg day, used legs on him

Rapid-fire one-liners about Hunter Biden's laptop missing Napster, Joy Behar withholding sex, Red Band's mother getting wool breast implants. Strong joke density with quick punchlines.

• Hunter Biden laptop missing Napster, not Minesweeper
• Joy Behar withholding sex, husband erected sign outlawing abortion
• Red Band's mama so old has wool breast implants causing complications

William does surgical precision jokes about Jordan Peele, Zuckerberg metaverse kissing, NFL draft/Vietnam comparison, religious nuts, hunter Biden laptop/lap dance, metaverse kissing as fleshlight.

• Zuckerberg's metaverse kissing device already exists; it's called a Fleshlight.
• NFL draft reminds of Vietnam; Hunter Biden laptop not lap dance.

Material about finishing grad school thesis on Hunter Biden's fertility, CNN Plus cancellation possibly due to n-word usage, Disney pushing gay/trans laws because Mickey Mouse is goofy.

• Grad thesis on Hunter Biden being so fertile he got Nick Cannon pregnant.
• CNN Plus cancellation possibly due to using n-word too much.
• Disney pushing gay/trans laws because Mickey Mouse has been goofy.

Jokes about filming planes for crash footage, ethnic comedians exaggerating appearance, English as second language, Dennis Rodman in airport bathroom, kidnapping/babysitting wordplay, Muppet movie rating system.

• Just filming planes in case one crashes for later sale footage
• New movie rating: children under 30 can't watch Muppets, they're nightmares

Regular comedian doing tight, written jokes about hosting Will Smith roast (no topics off-limits), privilege spelling, trans Kentucky Derby winner, and Aphex Twin death jokes. Polished set with minimal riffing.

• Will Smith tombstone: 'Rest In Privilege,' mocking his privilege despite spelling trouble.
• Trans people winning Kentucky Derby, winning everything, that's why it's funny.
• 63% of people hear music on deathbed; in 100% it's Aphex Twin.

William closes the show with jokes about hook dick, Ash Wednesday, defunding court system over wife's custody ruling, company brain-combustion weapon, mistaken for Jimmy Carr over his British accent references.

• Hook dick joke opening, also have a hook dick like Sam
• MLK after banging white woman would be Ash Wednesday joke
• Defunding court system where ex-wife got everything

William discusses a Samurai Scooby-Doo character, global warming freeze tag concerns, highway adoption versus child adoption, and betting on a petting zoo at a county fair. Very chaotic, partly attacked Red Band during set.

• Samurai Scooby-Doo character (partially told, attacked Red Band mid-set).
• In 10 years freeze tag will be gone due to global warming.
• People adopt highways when there are plenty of children to adopt.

Dark murder jokes about stabbing 30 homeless people with nightstick ('I am the nightstick'), Pete Davidson/Kanye space joke. Deliberately shocking material.

• South by Southwest tradition: murders drunk homeless people with nightstick—'I am the nightstick'
• Pete Davidson space travel with Kanye paying his bill

William opens with threats if anyone jokes about his bald head, then performs extensive material about Will Smith/Chris Rock Oscars incident via Bagger Vance references.

• If anyone jokes about bald head, Tony will slap them
• Putin won't release G.I. Jane 2 in Russian theaters (Oscars reference)
• Extended Bagger Vance material: Will Smith's movie roles contradict his Oscars violence

William opens with joke about redband buying house, compares Marcy's Playground's one hit song, makes Biden/buffalo nickel joke, mentions recently eating mushrooms.

• Marcy's Playground parents only know Sex and Candy one-hit-wonder
• Joe Biden so old they'll put his face on buffalo nickel

William discusses Aphex Twin prayer jokes, Sonic Hedgehog 2 Russian release impact, Operation Dumbo Drop conspiracy theory, Harvey Weinstein prison break fantasy, and Biden state of union Sky Music joke.

• God prays to Aphex Twin before sleeping
• Russians should have bombed Ukraine before Sonic 2 release
• Would break into prison to service Harvey Weinstein

William performs high-energy set with jokes about Rick Moranis child abuse, Russia/Ukraine beanie babies, maid with pink eye, and game show concept. Fast-paced dark humor.

• Rick Moranis fed cough syrup to child actors
• Maid has pink eye; stops licking toilet clean
• Game show: immediately give minority female prize

Edgy observational comedy about Queen Latifah, weed Viagra causing hard eyes, Biden crack pipe distribution, and Memphis Strangler murder references. Dark absurdist humor.

• Queen Latifah movie casting is sad, bad joke writing outcome.
• Weed Viagra makes eyes hard, physical comedy punchline.
• Biden crack pipe distribution, Hunter Biden bet reference.

William delivered sharp, political comedy about Aphex Twin, Texas banning books on race and sexuality, and metaverse rape warnings. His jokes about not wearing provocative clothing in the metaverse were particularly strong.

• Aphex Twin credited as genius regardless of controversial affiliations
• Texas banning race and sexuality books compared to pornography
• Metaverse rape victim told to avoid provocative clothing

William performs about voting for John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt, Neil Young leaving Spotify, 5G causing seizures, and Justin Trudeau dressing like an Indian person.

• Voted for John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt in election
• Neil Young threatening to leave Spotify, forgetting Sweet Caroline isn't his song
• Haven't seen Aziz Ansari and Justin Trudeau in same place, questioning Trudeau's Indian costume

William jokes about losing Meatloaf and Louie Anderson, watching foreign films including Aladdin, looked up ABC lyrics on Rap Genius realizing he'd been saying wrong letters, New Year's resolution to use internet less.

• Lost Meatloaf and Louie Anderson, Louie tried to eat Meatloaf
• Watched Aladdin as foreign film, looked up ABC lyrics on Genius
• Washington DC lacrosse team will be named Washington White Skins for inclusivity

Longest-standing regular delivers fresh minute on KFC fake chicken, Eminem fake beef, explicit sexual content, Taco Bell rats, rioting and looting.

• KFC fake chicken matched with Eminem fake beef
• Pussy so tight uses airpods for double penetration
• Taco Bell released thousands of captive rats for cooking

Performs grandfather's set about Nintendo switches and hot wives, admits he wrote it for his actual grandfather who couldn't attend.

• Grandpa joke: nowadays find switch by calling Nintendo instead of going to woods
• Wife so hot Viagra takes him instead

William opens with dark joke about being raped at comedy house, discusses New Year's resolutions about selfishness, and makes extensive Elizabeth Holmes securities fraud joke with Steve Jobs costume comparison.

• Got raped at the comedy house in San Antonio; beware the place.
• New Year's resolution is to stop murdering people, unlike people saying 'focus on needs'.
• Elizabeth Holmes securities fraud conviction; imagines her saying 'oh fuck' when verdict read.

William jokes about Maximus staying with him, Home Alone 1 vs 2 debate, sex swing vs sex zipline, University of Pennsylvania swimmer transition and records.

• Home Alone 2 is so bad he voted for Trump to get him out of acting
• University of Pennsylvania swimmer identifies as female, breaking women's records including dick size
• Built sex zipline in backyard, more extreme than sex swing

Observational comedy about Viagra treating Alzheimer's, binge-eating and purging, GTA San Andreas, carpal tunnel from gaming, and shooting guns off porch at 3 AM.

• Viagra doesn't cure Alzheimer's but keeps them busy staring at their dicks

William performs movie comparisons using 'Beasts of No Nation' as baseline joke (comparing to Cool Runnings, Last King of Scotland, Blood Diamond), makes NFT slave joke, parodies Neil Young as 'Neil Old'.

• Beasts of No Nation makes other films look like comedies by comparison.
• 3D NFTs but they're slaves joke about blockchain and slavery.
• Parody of Neil Young called Neil Old based on phrase similarity.

William delivered tight jokes about his son at the gun show, the Godfather horse head reference, chaperoning proms and playing Adam's Song by Blink182, and working at Chuck E. Cheese trying to bond with high school coworkers.

• Son couldn't clinch muscles at gun show; Godfather horse head reference
• Works at Chuck E. Cheese, plays Blink182 to bond with high school coworkers

William performs a new minute about learning masturbation from Miss Amy O, his hemorrhoid, Trump vs Biden policies on police/jail, Lost in Translation, Mormon sidechick named Nerf, and Discover cards.

• Miss Amy O taught him how to masturbate two weeks ago
• Currently has hemorrhoid that Instagram keeps removing picture of

William delivered edgy jokes about Taylor Swift writing songs about him, her doing blackface in bedroom, his lawyer dad suing Doctor Mario, and racial commentary about Kyle Rittenhouse. Dark humor throughout.

• Taylor Swift writing multiple breakup songs about him; she did blackface in bedroom (his fetish).
• His lawyer dad sued Doctor Mario for malpractice.
• If Rittenhouse was Black, he'd have a mural painted in his honor.

Tight minute about Wes Anderson films and deleted scenes; wants to be in one despite being casually racist; discusses Lost airplane never being found.

• Wes Anderson makes films from deleted scenes; wants to be in one by being casually racist.
• Adrian Brody's salary joke miscalculation; nervous recovery about not understanding Wes Anderson references.

William performs jokes about Alec Baldwin, Fight Club, Pixies, running over pedestrians, killing people. Strong closer with rapid-fire callbacks.

• Alec Baldwin killing someone, Dr. Death, Fight Club references.
• Pixies and downloads, running over people, if Baldwin did stand-up he would kill.

Got trapped in a walk-in freezer for 20 minutes while smoking weed; made jokes about kombucha, Jesus Christ being liberal, Butthole Surfers, California gender-neutral toy law, and Caitlyn Jenner's garage sale.

• Trapped in freezer for 20 minutes while smoking weed
• Jesus Christ was a liberal, look where it got him

William performs new minute about grandfather emailing from heaven with good wifi, blaming Facebook for Trump election (agrees with comparison to heavy metal/school shootings), Barbie from Arkansas marrying Ken, Austin police not responding to petty crimes, stealing jokes.

• Grandfather emails from heaven with excellent wifi connection
• Blaming Facebook for Trump is like blaming metal for school shootings
• Barbie from Arkansas married Ken because he's kinfolk

New York Times COVID predictions, Texas Roadhouse/Guy Fieri satire, Fisher-Price vape pen, racial slurs, vape culture, drug dealer with Buick tattoos.

• MTV News confirms New York Times COVID predictions for credibility.
• Guy Fieri executive chef at Texas Roadhead will suck your dick.

New jokes including Home Depot/Aphex Twin reference, Facebook Ray-Bans surveillance joke comparing Mark Zuckerberg to Crash Test Dummy, 9/11 suicide bomber jokes, and terrorist airplane field jokes.

• Home Depot jingle invented by Aphex Twin (electronic musician)
• Facebook Ray-Bans glasses record everything, Zuckerberg looks like mortician crash test dummy
• 99 suicide bomber virgins joke - 99 problems but not a virgin

William performs new material about Kermit Oscar snub, Texas abortion law (6 weeks to murder innocent child), Christopher Reeve and national anthem refusal, abortion/crime rate, Hunter Biden Afghan refugee joke.

• Kermit not winning Oscar for Muppet movie says lot about Hollywood
• Texas abortion law gives women 6 weeks to murder innocent child
• Christopher Reeve refused standing for anthem before death

No set recap for this appearance.

Complained beauty salon workers can't read minds about haircut. Attacked Generation Z for not shooting up schools. Taliban sex slaves and pronouns joke. Montessori school = socialism.

• Beauty salon workers can't read minds about haircut specifications
• Generation Z doesn't shoot up schools, good thing actually
• Montessori school = raising socialists for parents to feel good

Has mono not COVID. Wagon-running joke about Red Band's great grandmother. Taliban vs Democratic Party joke. Hunter Biden widow joke.

• Drinking with twins lets you drink twice as much, same absorption.
• Red Band's great grandmother before trains, wagons ran on her.
• Taliban vs Democratic Party; Hunter Biden should beg dead brother's widow.

William jokes about Hans's makeout girls having COVID, wishes Japan finished Pearl Harbor, cornhole in Olympics for inclusivity, and does impression of little person asking audition questions.

• Alert girls Hans made out with that they have COVID
• Wish Japanese finished the job at Pearl Harbor

William performs his regular minute about inserting Mickey Mouse into famous movies (Mary Poppins divorce storyline) and makes political jokes about forced vaccination and discrimination.

• Mickey Mouse dressed as British nanny (Mary Poppins) to get closer to kids after divorcing Minnie, then Minnie found out.
• Biden forcing vaccination; Asians/whites get vaccinated double the rate of Hispanics/Blacks; proposes putting unvaccinated in jail and on back of buses.

William opens by claiming he tested positive for COVID two days ago, then performs jokes written on LSD about Minnie Mouse gaining weight.

• Minnie Mouse put on weight.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Titanic impression about only black lady, Pepsi flavors, homeless reality show pitch, Sarah Hendrix Buco De Pepo promo. Kill Tony regular with fresh minute weekly.

• Titanic impression: black woman refusing to get on the boat
• Film homeless people in one house, they'd leave for shopping carts

William Montgomery performs dark material using written jokes about Amber alerts with product placement ads, and observational humor about reading from papers. His material is controversial but expertly crafted, showcasing his unique comedic voice.

• Amber alerts should have product placement ads like 'two for one margaritas at Chili's'.

Does rapid-fire movie reviews critiquing plot holes and demanding representation. Reviews Gremlins, Hook, Schindler's List, Honey I Blew Up the Kid, Boss Baby 2, Darkest Hour, Fern Gully.

• Schindler's List needs more action, less anorexic nudity
• Won't watch Boss Baby 2 or Darkest Hour without Black representation

Political and observational humor touching on Hunter Biden, Pearl Harbor comparisons, and Joe Biden's family struggles. Set was disrupted by lighting changes during performance.

• Hunter Biden teaching fake news course at Tulane, would be better as future news with arrest prediction.
• Pearl Harbor movie worse than actual Pearl Harbor event; imagining 9/11 romantic comedy.
• Joe Biden identifies with Black people, mentions his son is a crack addict.

New material featuring jokes about pronouns, the border wall, trans cops, and his nostalgia for Chuck E. Cheese during the pandemic. Known for his notebook-style delivery.

• Barack Obama influence on Biden's border wall with ivy growing on it.
• Solution to police resistance: more trans female cops to confuse suspects.
• Chuck E. Cheese sending payment request emails while still in pandemic.

William performs jokes about his elderly father, Bill Gates/COVID, Dr. Seuss, and creates a setup about "Only Fans" as a home improvement store selling fans.

• My dad's so old he remembers when Dr. Seuss was a sex symbol
• Starting home improvement store selling only fans with 'Only Fans' as punchline
• Bill Gates COVID conspiracy joke about software and viruses

William performs risky jokes about DMX's overdose, C-SPAN 3, Tiger Woods driving off a cliff, and Chris Farley's death. He mentions his father Larry sent him the DMX joke and admits to having an extensive criminal record.

• DMX rapper who ODed and went into coma, now dead
• Tiger Woods played golf with David Spade then drove off cliff

William performs a rapid-fire set of absurdist non-sequiturs and observational humor, including jokes about immigrants, vaccines, and his rock band Rock Band. He's visibly on Adderall and commits hard to the bit about buying Adderall pills for $600.

• He joined a rock band called Rock Band with only one controller
• His buddy is a heroin addict; he sold him COVID vaccine as prank
• He's an anti-Semite but won't gas chamber Doctor Seuss

Absurdist observational humor about a Russian punk band called Pussy Riot, parasites from bad sushi at Shoneys, and references to Tiger Woods and the Black National Anthem.

• Russian punk band Pussy Riot released a song; hopes grandmother doesn't illegally download it.
• Critics call Pussy Riot's song greatest Christian rock ever with Bible verse lyrics.
• Tiger Woods so bad at driving he ended up in hospital.

One-liner specialist performing fresh material about the Miami Marlins and current events including Biden's Syria strikes. Known for his signature winking segment with the crowd.

• Miami Marlins so bad their stadium became a morgue during COVID
• Joe Biden started war within months of presidency

Set about regional sports, opioid crisis, Richard Nixon, and Santa Claus with southern charm and self-deprecating humor about his appearance.

• Vanderbilt had female kicker; Texas A&M's response about cheerleaders.
• G. Gordon Liddy broke into Watergate but not show business.
• Santa Claus is not Muslim (historical reference humor).

William performed a rambling 3-minute character-driven set about touchdown dances with bombs, sniper references, Beastie Boys, Mel Gibson, Dolly Parton COVID vaccines, and his penis looking like a blue Tootsie Roll Pop. High-energy, absurdist comedy with characters and impressions.

• Touchdown dance character - acts like bomb in football, runs to press box yelling
• Penis looks like blue Tootsie Roll Pop from birth defect not spina bifida
• Dolly Parton cured COVID - joke about vaccinating his achy breaky heart

William opened claiming dizziness, made observations about schizophrenic homeless people as ghost whisperers, gentrified Sesame Street, and closed with Hunter Biden crude joke about necrophilia and infidelity.

• Schizophrenic homeless as ghost whisperers using outside voice
• Sesame Street gentrification forces unemployed puppets to move
• Hunter Biden knocked up stripper running out of dead brothers' widows

William delivered rapid-fire dark jokes about Anne Frank, Kamala Harris, "Are You Afraid of the Dark," and ended with a controversial George Floyd callback.

• Anne Frank wrote funny jokes in her diary, mostly racist.
• At this point is there any celebrity that didn't die of COVID except George Floyd.

William opened with observational jokes about Miss Piggy, Harvard-Epstein scandal, Kamala Harris, and slavery, delivered in rapid succession.

• Harvard gave back Epstein money when they heard it was from him
• Kamala Harris legalized prostitution through sleeping with SF mayor
• Slavery comparison to Africa boarding ships

William delivered observational humor about OnlyFans, Anne Frank's diary, cnn coverage, and Kamala Harris, with quick one-liners and topical material.

• I wrote Cliff's Notes to Anne Frank's diary spoiler alert only suspenseful part
• CNN says O.J. Simpson was mostly peaceful except two minor incidents
• Kamala Harris has so much black pride she married a white jew

William performs as an Arab Sheikh with one-liners about being mistaken for a terrorist, wife jokes, and observations about Saudi culture and Islam. He discusses Muhammad's diet and reveals he shit himself in the costume.

• Do I look like a guy who'd kill a journalist or do business with Hunter Biden
• What do you call a woman driver beheaded? A flying carpet.
• Tony spends more time in sand traps than Saudi drug dealers (golf joke).

William jokes about craft beer, his appearance in a minivan, doing drugs in his parents' carport, and references blackish with absurdist variations like "trans-ish" and "racist-ish."

• Craft beer jokes layered with references to drugs and carport use.
• Absurdist variation: blackish becomes trans-ish and racist-ish.

William performed edgy material about MTV being fired for not playing music, BET cancellations, fear of COVID, and drug use at his carport. Set was approximately 50-60 seconds with strong opening misdirects.

• MTV fired for no longer playing music.
• Fear of COVID so bad he called the police.
• Reference to Elias Smith's suicide and Courtney Love connection.

William performed observational jokes about Facebook family photos, interracial porn preferences, phone batteries, and girlfriend ovulation humor with absurdist punchlines.

• Recent Facebook post showed baby cousin with mother's eyes and father's penis.
• Girlfriend ovulating so hard she barking like a dog.
• For ten dollars you can get one gram of weed or forty quarters.

Physical comedy about shake weights, elbow muscles, and Danny DeVito comparisons. Also references Casper the Friendly Ghost dying.

• Shake weight creates asymmetrical muscle development; ripped elbow.
• Dick looks like Danny DeVito auditioning for Taxi.

Extended bit comparing cockroaches to dogs, questioning why people fear roaches but not dogs despite similar hygiene issues. Critiques pharmaceutical marketing and roach vs. dog lobbying efforts.

• Dogs sleep in bed naked with us; roaches in kitchen cause panic despite similar exposure
• Roach commercials feature toxic chemicals vs. dog commercials with Sarah McLachlan

Set about rollerblades, Bill & Ted, homeschooling and school shooters, Dale Earnhardt tribute races, George Floyd, and racist jokes on Kill Tony. Strong joke density with provocative material.

• Tour de France but with rollerblades pitch dismissal
• Dale Earnhardt honored with race, George Floyd response comparison
• Racist joke on Kill Tony means three weeks hiding

William discussed being a poser Lakers fan, atheism, commercials, the fax machine song (Axel F), tough times with a coke dealer going to rehab, and complimenting an actress's voice work.

• Impression of poser Lakers fans who haven't seen Jack Nicholson on the sideline lately.
• References the fax machine song (Axel F) that plays when accidentally calling a fax number.
• Times are tough when your coke dealer goes to rehab.

Absurdist jokes about coffee, Lakers/Clippers fans, an earthquake prediction for August 27, 2020, and a compliment to Jimmy about the Italian Job.

• Women like coffee wrapped in styrofoam comparison
• Earthquake predicted for August 27, 2020 (three weeks prior)
• LaQuinta hotel chain impressions as landlord asking about breakfast

Absurdist one-liners about blimp sales, missing youth pastors, and Biden's running mate, mixing random topics with observational humor.

• Blimp salesman comparison to plumbing difficulty
• Missing youth pastor joke tied to not snitching
• Kamala Harris/Ugandan Giant wordplay

William covers Nike masks and vaccines, sketch about moving to Saudi Arabia and crucifying someone, Australian hipsters missing 'old Zealand,' and asks redman to believe in Jesus as best man.

• If Nike makes masks, people won't get vaccine.
• Saudi Arabia sketch: running for office, crucifying donors at fundraisers.
• Australian hipsters saying 'I miss the old Zealand'.

William performed jokes about international mixtape competitions, social distancing hurting the clown car industry, American Pie 2 credits being mostly Jewish crew, and a comparison between Antifa and the Houston Astros both stealing signs.

• Social distancing has hurt the clown car industry
• American Pie 2 deleted scene where they all get AIDS
• Antifa and Houston Astros both steal signs and come from hellholes

Fast-paced observational jokes about obituaries, eating bats during COVID, elevator signs, and the band 311. All jokes with snappy punchlines.

• Only reads obituaries to see if he killed anyone
• Bat consumption during quarantine predated Masked Singer reference
• Elevator only goes up, lady says press 311 to go down

William performs jokes about attending Showtime at the Apollo, Smashing Pumpkins as a band name recontextualized as school shootings, and criticisms of modern weather programming.

• Smashing Pumpkins is cool band name; if we named ours after high school hijinks: Shooting Schools.
• Old weather channel with lo-fi graphics and elevator jazz beats modern sensationalized programming.
• Red Band joke about receiving testosterone supplement in mail.

William did jokes about Spider-Man 2, Bill Clinton and Epstein on planes, Red Band's bathroom, and Tracy Chapman's car. He also made random references to Rambo and performed improvisational tornado impressions.

• Donnell loved you in Spider-Man 2; scared dust will call cops.
• Never flew with Bill Clinton and Epstein; too much whining kids.
• Tracy Chapman fast car; maybe we can make deal and get somewhere.

William performs about having hepatitis C, Victoria's Secret founder giving billion to Epstein, confusing pizza chains, and repeating jokes from previous night's set that killed.

• Called lights out because I have hepatitis C.
• Papa John's claiming extra-large is actually just large with same toppings—charity scam.

William performed material about Brandon (unclear reference), watching The Sixth Sense repeatedly, police syringes/tip jar jokes, Hootie and the Blowfish singer being single, defunding Ghostbusters, and favorite/least favorite bands.

• Watching The Sixth Sense constantly; suspects it's Brandon
• Darius Rucker from Hootie is single; better than new single
• Traffic is favorite band; child traffic is least favorite

William discusses being Hispanic, making a sequel to Saving Silverman, and observing that Robin Williams wore a tongue to make peace signs vulgar. He riffs on The Butterfly Effect movie and dating.

• Sequel to Saving Silverman where he convinces Jonathan Silverman not to jump
• Butterfly Effect remake where every retelling results in becoming a basketball player

Dark comedy set featuring references to Chris D'Elia, Chris Angel magic tricks, Cracker Barrel, and a tribute to Judith Barcy (voice actress who was murdered by her father). Heavy use of edgy humor and controversial references.

• Whatever happened to the 'stop and move away from vehicle' guy reference
• Chris Angel's greatest trick is making himself disappear
• RIP to Judith Barcy, voice actress murdered by her father

Dark jokes about women in kitchens, pickup lines about school shootings, and addressing people calling him Travis McMichael (Ahmad Arbery's murderer). References friend being shot during gas station window incident.

• Woman's place in kitchen is in oven; extremely dark offensive material
• Pickup line: 'What's your favorite school shooting?' dark topical humor
• Adderall inventor must have been on Adderall; one-liner structure

Dark, absurdist humor covering random topics including Cotton Eyed Joe, VHS bungee jumping games, cheating in marriage and baseball. Quick-hitting one-liners with no clear narrative arc.

• Rick Marinus joins ISIS and tells wife he blew up kids
• New bungee jumping VHS game is super hard to complete
• Marriage more exciting when cheating involved like baseball

William performs in a hazmat suit, joking about being rejected from Honey I Shrunk the Kids on ice, smoking unemployment marijuana, and misremembering My Girl details while wearing the suit.

• Rejected from Honey I Shrunk the Kids on ice, started unemployment marijuana
• Wore hazmat suit after buying it at Pier 1 Imports in Calabasas

Rapid-fire joke setup and punchlines about first words, bank robbery, gun manuals, and Crocs, demonstrating strong professional joke writing and delivery.

• First words 'mom and papa,' last words 'bungee cord feels loose'
• Bank robbery: after threatening teller with gun, don't ask for deposit slip.
• Wearing Crocs means you can assemble an AK-47.

Set about China trip, toxic shock syndrome, jail, bullies, parents surprising him with Betty Ford trip. Parents (Larry and Frances) came on stage mid-set.

• Had toxic shock syndrome and sock in vagina while in jail in China
• Parents giving him all-expenses-paid trip to Betty Ford Clinic Resort and Casino

Long-standing controversial regular. Opens with shock jokes about throwing Reg off a balcony, HIV/germaphobia, Kobe Bryant helicopter prediction. Reveals he has marks/bites from girlfriend and later admits punching her.

• Germaphobe since getting HIV, Kobe helicopter prediction references
• Girlfriend stabbed him with keys, threatened to jump off third story

William performs a new minute about being a Christian who plays Ouija board, hot-boxing his kid, being fired from a security camera factory for stealing candy cigarette machines.

• Christian who plays Ouija board; hot-boxed his kid who slept great—now worried he's dead.
• Fired from security camera factory for stealing candy cigarettes; it was dad's idea at Chuck-e-Cheese.

William does impressions and absurdist jokes about Michael Jackson's moonwalk physics, setting up an escape room apartment for $1000/month, fentanyl delivery, and medical visits for strep throat.

• Setting up escape room apartment charging $1000/month, $500 if sleep in same bed.
• Coronavirus stopping fentanyl shipments is bad because overnight delivery guaranteed.

William did a dark set about selling a screenplay about the apocalypse, joking about getting high in middle school and choking himself, and Dilaudid usage at CVS pharmacy.

• Sold screenplay about apocalypse called The Stained like Stephen King meets Michael Jackson
• Used to get high in middle school and choke himself in desk
• Found correct Dilaudid dosage in water for shooting up

William opens with a dark joke about losing custody, then performs material about Black men on First 48 being rappers, and an extended anecdote about his father's illness and watching Encino Man.

• Lost custody but summer about to be lit.
• Every Black guy who dies on First 48 was an aspiring rapper.
• Joke about Pauly Shore: 'You're not in Hell yet.'

William performed a new minute as kill Tony regular, discussing how no seasons in LA affect aging, looking for his father in gay bars, Power Rangers without costumes, and bubble gum discoveries.

• No seasons in LA prevents aging awareness, cougars stay active until death
• Can't find father in gay bars, researching Power Rangers without costumes

Absurdist jokes about Stargate Atlantis, thanking Fantastic Sams Memphis haircut, moment of silence for Cathy the elephant trainer who died jumping off roof. Deliberately fictional and lying set.

• Thanks Fantastic Sams barbers and Cathy elephant trainer who jumped roof trying to fly

Regular comedian making dark jokes about his brother getting hoof-and-mouth disease, soiling his pants, his daughter's beauty pageants, and referencing JC Penney.

• His brother was diagnosed with hoof-and-mouth disease from kissing horses in Mississippi.
• If he has a little girl, he'd put her in beauty pageants ages 3-5 so he can dress her up and pose her.

William jokes about people mistaking him for a doctor in scrubs, shows a photo of his dad at Disney World 2002, and offers baseball motivational wisdom that there's always a chance.

• People think he's doctor because wears scrubs, has five dollar bills
• Baseball motivational wisdom: there's always a chance

William delivered absurdist jokes claiming he's half-brother to Andrew Santino, second cousin to Dan Soder, both with herpes, trapped in a Sam's Club looking for his dad, and stories about caves.

• Makes $30k/year, wants to work at Comedy Store, but wasn't funny enough.
• Nonsensical claims about being half-brother to guests and herpes.

William performs about being a decent puppeteer but bad funeral director, researching wormholes, discovering astrological birthdays, and his brother Vance heckling him from the audience calling out his personal flaws.

• Not best funeral director but hell of a puppeteer
• Girlfriend needed Plan B three times in as many months

Opens with Shark Week joke success leading to TV appearances. Makes Godfather/trolls joke. Discusses Dial soap hand-modeling work. Material about opening for Katt Williams and Cat Stevens.

• Shark Week joke changed my life—$100K Pyramid, Jeopardy, etc.
• Godfather spoiler: it's about trolls, not the Mafia.

William performs a set mixing dark humor about custody courts, Papa John's, Veterans Day, and Shark Week feeding frenzies (1993-1997), admitting his father didn't actually die and displaying his typical pattern of lying on stage.

• Asks what dick to suck to get kids back in court setting.
• Best Shark Week was 1993-1997 with chum, boats, feeding frenzies.

William does absurdist jokes about doing well in front of Japanese people, joining a one-biscuit cover band, and running game on girls while asleep.

• I tend to do well in front of Japanese people at shows
• Recently joined band called small test doing one biscuit covers

William appears in blackface with red beard, makes joke about his uncle buying him Sammy Sosa cereal and waking up Black. Brief set with minimal jokes, mostly character work.

• Uncle bought Sammy Sosa cereal; woke up Black

William performs a new minute with pandering callbacks to Sacramento and San Francisco locations. He mentions his wedding date coinciding with Full House's premiere and his uncle Ralph on the Challenger shuttle.

• September 22, 1987 I got married; also when Full House aired—give it up for Olsen twins
• Uncle Ralph Martinez blew up on Challenger shuttle—I've never stolen that much food

William opens with joke about daughter born same year Giants won World Series, mentions upcoming film about Muslim man and dogsled racer in Alaska, references homeschooling his handicapped daughter Sarah, threatens to jump off Golden Gate Bridge.

• 2010: daughter born, Giants won World Series - greater achievement was the sports win
• If he jumps off bridge it'll be Golden Gate Bridge because he's in San Francisco

William performs about gravity in space, his recent grocery store trips, and his uncle Richard who allegedly died in a gang-related incident at Alcatraz where he directed movies.

• Uncle Richard was a famous Alcatraz movie director who directed Jaws the Revenge.

Set about Dracula as buddy visiting mom's house asking for blood, brother putting cleaning lady's false teeth in his own mouth, crossword puzzles.

• Dracula visits mom's house repeatedly, asking for blood.
• Brother puts cleaning lady's false teeth in own mouth.

William, a regular with 10 months on show, does tight material about smoking embalming fluid, faking death for dog, various observations.

• Had to stop smoking weed, got addicted to embalming fluid
• Faked death to see how dog would react, dog tried to eat me

William performs brand-new minute about hiring a Jewish clown, his coworker Patrick from Oriental origin, and references to Lyme disease and peeing blood. Self-deprecating and absurdist material.

• Jewish clown hired for kids' birthday party

William jokes about Columbus Day being changed to National Filipino day, mentions his uncle Richard running 'We Descamps' (iTunes for Lou Bega songs). References a guy swallowed by a sinkhole in Florida. Discusses being pulled over by police.

• Columbus Day changed to National Filipino day for uncle Richard's iTunes clone
• Been poisoning roommates with Pepcid AC in their Colgate toothpaste

New minute featuring movie pitch 'High Tides,' impression of uncle working in pharmacy sewer, Aztec heritage references. Character work and impression-based.

• Movie pitch: High Tides about LA police and bomb squad member on exploding bus.
• Uncle impression: works in pharmacy sewer (rambling, unclear punchline).

William performs abstract, largely nonsensical material about Dracula, his eyes in dark rooms, a Dr. Seuss-like doctor named Frank Dracula who lives in a tree, and references to magnolia trees and Zantac 75.

• Dracula character lives in magnolia tree outside parents' house, addicted to Zantac 75.

Set with absurdist storytelling about uncle Richard Dracula, living in sewers, working for TNT Network rescue 9-1-1, and a whistling album with dark family themes.

• Whistling album about dad's drinking and family trauma hiding from father

William performed a rambling set claiming to be from La Jolla, discussing zantac 75 acid reflux, working at a wood fire pizza place, past illnesses (strep throat, Legionnaires disease), and various incoherent stories.

• Claims been on zantac 75 for acid reflux; from La Jolla; worked at wood-fired pizza
• Claims worked for Zorro production for three years as Antonio Banderas's cousin
• Multiple disease claims: strep throat, Legionnaires, hammer toe, whooping cough, Lyme's disease

William delivers absurdist comedy about moving to California for recycling, crashing Jaleel White's car drunk, keeping toothpaste in refrigerator, kissing roommate's cat Aladdin, and living in sewers.

• Moved to California for recycling opportunities, crashed Jaleel White's car
• Keeps toothpaste in refrigerator, uncle had stock in Colgate
• Roommate caught him kissing her cat Aladdin, tabby, two weeks left

William jokes about creating a dating website for white guys with lupus and Black guys with sickle-cell anemia, stealing his grandmother's car at 17 and killing someone, serving 8 of 20 years, getting involved in scared straight, and being arrested for stealing shoes.

• Dating website for white guys with lupus, Black guys with sickle-cell
• Stole grandmother's car, killed someone, spent 8 of 20 years in prison
• Zima and Advil caused stomach bleeding; roommate brought Ziploc bags

William jokes about Milli Vanilli's death, getting fired from QVC for heroin addiction, having cat parties on acid, and a cat named Edward Francis from high school.

• Moment of silence for Milli Vanilli's Roth Anderson on Labor Day
• Takes acid and rounds up neighborhood cats for cat parties

Absurdist material with references to his father's insurance agency dungeon, snorting catnip, becoming a dancer, and working as librarian doing father's impression.

• Snorting catnip recently with doughnut, wrote joke five years ago

William does impressions of taxi driver and Home Alone 2, jokes about pooping pants at work, mentions pressure about being regular on show, discusses dead friend Tony Chin, bathroom touching incident with Tony Chin manager, and uses increasingly absurd stories.

• Pooped pants at work at Chili's unluckily
• Taxi driver Home Alone 2 impression what's the deal

Absurdist material about smoking K2, wanting young daughters in beauty pageants, joke about cousin with whooping cough infecting his daughter.

• Smoked weed, felt like K2 in Philippines with Spanish accents
• 3-5 year olds best age for beauty pageants to dress up

Memphis comedian performs wild improvisational material about stealing from Kmart, threatening coworkers with AK-47s, Alexa impressions, current relationship, acid use, and hammertoe from wearing aqua socks.

• Stole from Kmart; told police officer about it; threatens to shoot coworkers
• Got hammertoe from wearing aqua socks for five weeks straight

William jokes about having strep throat and AIDS, flip cup before immune compromise, watching Asian kids at theme parks, going to psychics, and being in a rap group called Adenoids.

• Used to play flip cup before immune system compromised, now has strep throat and AIDS
• Only goes to psychics who can tell past, watches Asian kids unable to get on roller coasters

William discusses getting a job at Supercuts, has a serious balloon fetish (particularly necks), references a meerkat named Richard Yoplait who rapes things since 2005 and takes victims to motels, and comments on sounds of neighbors having sex while masturbating to porn.

• Serious balloon fetish, especially the neck part of balloons
• References meerkat Richard Yoplait who's been raping things since 2005, takes victims to motels

William performs as a psychic who gives vague readings about body ailments, mentions his lonely past and eccentric history including a dead aunt during Mount St. Helens.

• Psychic readings about audience members' body ailments.
• Half-aunt died during Mount St. Helens eruption in 1980s.

William discussed wearing scrubs that make people think he's a doctor, addiction to nitrous oxide canisters, ESPN work, being told he looks like Bonnie Raitt, and working as a teacher in Memphis for six months.

• People in CVS bathrooms think he's a doctor because of scrubs
• Addiction to whippet canisters and doesn't know what to do with them
• Black Little Mermaid impression about having chlamydia and not being able to feel legs

Set about his father's self-defense class claims, references to Honey I Shrunk the Kids, and a dark story about his aunt being cut in half by a train on July 4th.

• Dad claims to teach self-defense but only wrestles parents
• Confusing black belts with Black people in mugging incident

Montgomery performed about stealing from airport luggage, doing cocaine with Dracula unable to see reflection, putting tarantulas in Halloween bags with Sal in 1996.

• Airport luggage theft joke about bags not following on flights
• Doing cocaine with Dracula can't see reflection in mirror

William does a short set about telling his daughter about boobs, discusses Dracula peeing, has idea for t-shirt about big hands and magic, and mentions Cracker Barrel Kid 55.

• Spells out boobs on calculator whenever daughter around.
• Not all people with big hands are good at magic, but it scares him.

William did absurdist material about Tim Tebow doing cocaine off table, owning streaming diamonds website with Ernest movies, plastic containers stolen from mailbox, impression of living in Philippines.

• If Tim Tebow still played NFL, found self doing cocaine off table
• Website streaming diamonds like Netflix but only Ernest movies
• Impression of self in Philippines with darkened skin for comedic effect

William does a bit as a County Alderman candidate, discussing his grandfather dying at sea, implementing policies to remove sidewalk height differences, and banning elephants by 2022. He ties policies to community safety.

• As Alderman candidate, will ban elephants by 2022: pachyderms more like pack your bags
• Policy: lower all sidewalks to street height to prevent ankle injuries
• Bearded dragon escaped bathtub, now bites him at night while he sleeps

Surreal comedian performs abstract jokes about brother's teacher in homeschool scenario, impressions including Swamp Thing, addiction to magic with rabbits, and references to premature twins and sirens.

• Brother in incestuous relationship with homeschooled teacher, Paper Planes cutscene impression.
• Realized magic addiction when rabbit made kid smile, another Paper Planes cutscene.

William performs new minute about his three-year-old son Jameis, getting high on embalming fluid, McDonald's quarter pounder, and his confusing joke setup.

• Son Jameis gets high with him, steals at McDonald's
• On embalming fluid, having tunnel vision, real bad time

Set about movie 'Crouching Tiger Hidden Pool Cue' with bar fights in Japan, Rosetta Stone for deaf people, spreading chlamydia around, and looking for Tony Chen character from sewer system.

• Movie title 'Crouching Tiger Hidden Pool Cue' with bar fight scenes
• Rosetta Stone for deaf people joke

William does absurdist material about Jaws: The Revenge, being fired from a circus for bad weight guessing, and non-sequiturs about Biloxi Mississippi and his friend Tony Chin.

• Claims he was sailor in Jaws: The Revenge, 'Steven get off the back'
• Worked circus 5 years guessing weights, couldn't do the math right

William performed set about being in Ladybugs movie, addiction to ephedrine, and accidentally calling Texas narcotics officer while high claiming to be stuck in underwater cavern.

• Was only male actor in all-female soccer movie Ladybugs; had to stop cocaine with Ja Rule.
• Called Texas narc on ephedrine thinking it was friend, claimed stuck in underwater cavern.

William's first La Jolla set included jokes about being trapped in porta-potty, having diverticulitis, flight simulator pilot confusion, and Lexus sales work.

• Trapped in porta-potty for 45 minutes while having diverticulitis.
• Don't mistake him for pilot; only operates flight simulator.

William performs in blind jazz musician character, discusses Easter and 'All Dogs Go to Heaven,' does impression of his young self calling with uncle's dementia story.

• All Dogs Go to Heaven is the classic Easter movie, not typical choice
• Stealing watches off escalators by asking time while wearing sunglasses

William claimed he's related to the 27th President Ralph Martinez, made jokes about the president's policies, and discussed playing board games with best friend Cade Wallace and trying salvia at the Masters golf tournament.

• I'm related to 27th President Ralph Martinez who discovered rabies vaccine

William performs new minute about turtle dysmorphia diagnosis seeing turtle in mirror, joke about drinking mushrooms and hitting people with car, and various life anecdotes.

• Turtle dysmorphia - seeing turtle's head in mirror reflection instead of own face
• Got drunk, ate mushrooms, got in car and hit people, injured neck badly

New regular performer. April Fool's themed set with fake stories including Westminster Doorknob Lers and RollerCoaster Tycoon 3 with Helen Mirren.

• Fake silent moment for made-up friend Westminster Doorknob Lers
• Helen Mirren starring in RollerCoaster Tycoon 3 movie

Claims to be Problem Child actor from 90s and serial killer in Mexico. Movie critic who compares everything to Edward Scissorhands, confuses Jaws with it.

• Claims Problem Child actor who's been killing people in Mexico
• Movie critic compares all films to Edward Scissorhands
• His World War 2 screenplay: squirrel family in Berlin during Holocaust

William performs quick observational one-liners about not knowing McDonald's, meeting Dracula and thinking he'd be taller, and his friend not knowing what an intervention is.

• McDonald's waiter joke - family waiting 15 minutes for menus
• Meeting Dracula for first time and thinking he'd be taller
• Friend at intervention doesn't know what intervention actually is

William told jokes about buying cocaine at ATM with friend, addiction to candy cigarettes, and robbing garage sales because it's easy to steal from old ladies.

• Buddy and him at ATM, can't get $30 out, debating amounts
• Addicted to robbing garage sales because it's so easy

William did absurdist bits about Where's Waldo obsession, a condition limiting him to anal sex, a fake movie called 'Where Are My Fucking Keys,' and a fake Craigslist encounter with Tiffany where he met her after responding to a personal ad and they hooked up at Motel 8.

• Spent two days looking for Waldo; people say six hours, I say fuck off.
• Has condition where he only does anal sex; Dracula happy when girlfriend on period.
• Met Tiffany on Craigslist after she posted 'lonely as fuck, looking for fire crotch'; they hooked up at Motel 8 for $42.

Material featuring character impressions (uncle seeing Japanese person at water park, friend with foot fetish) and absurdist observations about uvulas and homelessness.

• Impression of uncle whenever he sees a Japanese person at water park (unintelligible).
• He's a big uvula guy, impression of friend with foot fetish telling him to take off his socks.
• If homeless, you can wear whatever (sombrero, garbage sack) without judgment.

William discussed being an amateur daredevil whose skate got caught in sewer grate, coughing people at movie theaters, and an impressio n of his aunt who got hit with golf ball.

• Skate caught in sewer grate during amateur daredevil phase.
• People coughing in movie theaters ruin the experience.

Regular on the show performing absurdist material about being fired from Home Shopping Network, living in tree, falling and breaking neck, working at antique mall with beanie babies, stealing people's bags and candy bars.

• Recently fired from Home Shopping Network; addicted to drug spice and lived in tree.
• Single, holding out for black or Oriental woman; started working antique mall, guy tried selling beanie babies.
• Stealing bags at Jacksonville Airport, using neck brace injury as cover; slipping on Butterfinger bars at 7-elevens.

William does absurdist humor about a Lyft driver not laughing at his joke, a poltergeist in his home, a cough diagnosis, a drug dealer on Instagram, and runs a fake ecstasy operation out of his basement.

• Lyft driver and only other Black passenger didn't laugh at his opening joke.
• Has a cough diagnosis; it's ruined his life; he coughs a lot.
• Ran fake MDMA operation from basement with rattlesnakes; cousin got sick, aunt showed up, 'rest is history.'

William joked about Monopoly properties, avoiding ecstasy on Boardwalk, a Little Mermaid impression, Christmas travel, and TSA gun comments about his arms.

• Don't buy ecstasy on Boardwalk in Monopoly; it's a cop.
• Little Mermaid impression: 'I got 20 thingamabobs, I've got 20!'
• TSA agent asked if he had bullets; he said thick arms, agent said 'guns.'

Observational comedy about performing exorcisms at Indian reservation, coding movie parodies, being Chris Kringle's brother Matt Kringle, membership in satanic church called Church of Secret Serpents.

• Movie about American code breaker in Jamaica, tap on shoulder from Jamaican: 'the code breaker you crack'.

William performed a detailed screenplay pitch for 'World War 2: A Survivor's Tale' about a squirrel family in Nazi Germany, featuring cast like Jonathan Taylor Thomas.

• Squirrel family in Nazi Berlin; mother supports Hitler's plans despite moral concerns.

William performs in a British accent at a dog restaurant, talks about getting high and thinking blood was coming from his ears, writing a troll movie, finding cocaine in margaritas, and stealing luggage at airports during Thanksgiving.

• Works at dog restaurant where he speaks in British accent all the time
• Steals people's luggage at airports, especially during Thanksgiving

Rambling comedic style mixing dark humor (Viagra vs AIDS), roofied at strip club, various absurdist stories about drugs, family, Ouija board, lightning strike, constantly veering into tangential narratives.

• Both parents Black but got recessive gene, looks completely White
• Viagra doesn't protect from AIDS, what am I gonna do

William performs a comedic whistling bit with his brother about Christmas classics, interspersed with dark family moments involving an alcoholic father. Ends with a non-sequitur about lupus.

• Whistling Christmas songs interrupted by father drinking in cellar
• Sister's friend got lupus from sneezing on Kmart shopping cart

William delivers absurdist jokes about sleeping in his mother's bed, a paralyzed dancer friend, and impressions of his uncle seeing Twister. He mentions being allergic to heroin and loving how acid makes Evanescence sound.

• Friend who's paralyzed from waist up is a dancer - it's a blessing
• He flipped 14 Hyundai Elantras while high on PCP

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William performed jokes about cancer, Jesus/metal detectors, Disney World, pineapples, and a fictional cooking show concept. The set was disjointed with awkward pauses and incomplete premises that didn't land well.

• Comparison between queen cancer and a child; dad has cancer
• Don't need Jesus if you have metal detector
• Movie idea: 'Spiky Pineapple' about holding a spiky fruit

William does observational humor and impressions including Foot Locker impressions, Jamaican accent jokes about eating almond joys and falling from trees, and commentary on nightmares.

• Foot Locker impression about giant collection of feet
• Jamaican accent about eating almond joys and falling from tree

Dark set about police defunding, George Floyd's counterfeit money, and offensive impressions of Oprah and okra.

• Police defunded years ago, George Floyd's money now worth more than ever
• George Floyd's last words were to make change for a twenty

Montgomery started with a joke about Ryan Gosling and Eva Mendes being married while discussing Scientology. He pivoted to a confused bit about starting a GoFundMe for the wrong person related to Minneapolis protests, then offered a controversial joke about asking for a bailout.

• Ryan Gosling married Eva Mendes, surprising as DeVito and Schwarzenegger
• I got GoFundMe names mixed up for Minneapolis criminal defense

William Montgomery delivered dark jokes about Paul Walker's death, Emma Stone, George Floyd, and looting during protests, with controversial social commentary.

• Eleven-year-old Paul Walker death joke presented as current controversy.
• Emma Stone body at bottom of pool joke.
• George Floyd joke leading to admission of looting.

Montgomery performs stream-of-consciousness one-liners including references to Jay-Z, diabetic dogs, Pete's Dragon, meeting girlfriend at X-Games, and Biden jokes. Notable for his characteristic delivery style.

• Jay-Z fan in bathtub 6 hours a day, has diabetic dog
• Met girlfriend at X-Games; turned out he kissed a half-pipe structure
• If he were a food, he'd be a hard-boiled egg

No set recap for this appearance.

William discusses the Trail of Tears, Roderick Howard, and his personal habits including leaving pubic hair in public restrooms.

• Trail of Tears joke about Indian children asking if they're there yet.
• Leaves pubic hair on toilet seats in public restrooms.

William runs for County Alderman with absurd policies banning Tokyo Drifting, protecting subdivisions from Indian burial grounds, making pull toys safer, and removing scary Lion King scenes from schools.

• If elected alderman, will ban Tokyo Drifting on streets after watching Tokyo Drift.
• Will ensure subdivisions not built on Indian burial grounds to stop poltergeist problems.

Absurdist set covering false memories of being in Waco cult, ABC Family editing, Extreme Home Makeover, and COVID lockdown jokes.

• Absurdist claims about being in Waco cult and ABC Family edit of Eyes Wide Shut.
• Claims he's jerked off 7,000 times during week six of quarantine.

William discusses DJing a homeschool prom, downloading a white noise app that was just the Seinfeld theme, learning he's not allergic to cats depending on how they're cooked, and jokes about waiting for Madea movies.

• White noise app downloaded was just Seinfeld theme song
• Not allergic to cats, depends on how you cook them

Discusses decrease in school shootings, Diary of Anne Frank audiobook, confused about Blair Witch appearing, saw Blues Brothers 2000 without seeing 1999, and Minority Report with Kevin Bacon and Ellen.

• Decrease in school shootings recently while listening to Anne Frank audiobook
• Never saw Blues Brothers 1999, only watched 2000 version
• Confused Minority Report with Ice agents searching for Blair Witch in Maryland

William performed while cosplaying as Mrs. Doubtfire. Set included jokes about his book about an eight-legged horse, Power Rangers jokes, and dark humor.

• Wrote book about eight-legged horse took three years

Montgomery performed absurdist material about watching Forrest Gump and 101 Dalmatians for the first time, making jokes about Axl Rose marrying Bella Thorne, and mentioning his runny nose and yellow foot during quarantine.

• Watched Forrest Gump for first time, cried at Bubba's death, wishes Axl Rose would marry Bella Thorne.
• Just watched 101 Dalmatians for first time and thinks he's sick from it.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

William opened praising Michael Bisping and his MMA-loving father, made vague references to t-shirts and aliens. Set was disorganized and unclear, had mentions of his girlfriend and breaking up.

• Doing cocaine with Arnold Schwarzenegger who keeps saying 'I'll be back'
• T-shirt idea with green alien design, unclear premise

No set recap for this appearance.