Kill Tony #516 — Pauly Shore, Josh Martin
Guests: Pauly Shore · Josh Martin
Lineup
Set: Michael performs a new minute covering donating antibodies at clinics, Bill Cosby being released from jail, and observations about the Olympics. He receives extra time from Tony and the panel.
Interview: Michael discusses his visit to a brothel called Pleasures/Dreamers, jokes about prices, and talks about his new hospital bed with sharp edges that he had to wrap with pool noodles.
- Donated antibodies at clinic where machine is actually guy named Machine
- Bill Cosby released from jail, sleep is best medicine joke
- Olympics observation about hurdles and portals sounding racist
- Michael receives extra time, performing 2 minutes 30 seconds instead of 60 seconds
- Discussion about Sharp-edged hospital bed wrapped with pool noodles
Set: Bilaal performs jokes about autoerotic asphyxiation, pears being bad apples, and offensive humor. He has been doing stand-up for about four years and recently moved to Austin.
Interview: Bilaal discusses moving to Austin a week ago, his lack of stable income, his background in Detroit and New York, and his interest in drawing and animation. Pauly Shore gives him $100 and then Josh Martin gives him another $100.
- Autoerotic asphyxiation joke about accidentally orgasming during lynching attempt
- Pears are bad apples, only eat if thrown to kill someone
- Pauly Shore spontaneously gives Bilaal $100, then Josh Martin gives another $100
- Bilaal says he will give the money to a homeless person, Pauly takes it back
Set: Dareon performs jokes about being overweight, never being "it" in tag, obesity being a disease descriptor, and a 911 joke that doesn't land. He moved to Austin a week ago from 140 pounds.
Interview: Dareon discusses his weight gain since moving to Austin, his wife who is in great shape, his job as a professional poker player, and his recent move to Texas.
- Never won at tag because he was always it due to size
- Obesity is disease you have not are, unlike hepatitis C
- Has a 911 joke that never lands well
- Pauly Shore doesn't talk to Dareon without Josh as intermediary
- Discussion about Dareon's marriage and bedroom dynamics
Set: Jimmy performs a song about wanting to have sex with a woman with a big ass named Fanny, using crude wordplay. The set is poorly received and called out as one of the worst performances.
Interview: Jimmy discusses his retirement from federal prison work, his current septic system business, his dog Baxter, his 26-year marriage, and his interests in fat asses and pornography, particularly step-mom porn.
- Song about woman named Fanny with large ass, whale tail joke
- Whale tail joke about Fanny's panties used to sail ship
- Set is widely panned as extremely poor quality
- Tony mocks Jimmy's resemblance to a small prison guard
- Jimmy discusses his father dying in motorcycle/cement truck accident
Set: David performs observational comedy about Spirit Airlines being terrible, judging people at airports, planes with folding chairs, and the pilot using Waze. The set is consistent and funny.
Interview: David discusses his headlining shows, his Instagram live streams, his short arms making video calls difficult, and his real estate commercial with William Montgomery.
- Spirit Airlines so bad pilot asked for gas money from passengers
- Spirit flight had plane full of folding chairs like cookout
- Pilot had Waze app up in cockpit
- Tony mocks David's short arms preventing him from fitting face in Instagram live
- Discussion about David's butt dialing only showing his buttcheek
Set: Jacques Noir performs jokes about being PC, punching crackers, and Martin Luther King Jr. walking and cheating on his wife during the 1960s civil rights era.
Interview: Jacques discusses his background from Baton Rouge Louisiana, his work as a motion graphic designer and documentary filmmaker, his dating preferences for Black and Brown women, and his music production.
- Liberal white kids asking pronouns, responded with punching crackers
- Martin Luther King Jr walked and cheated on wife during 60s
- Jacques performs brief music snippet and dances on stage
Set: Daylen performs jokes about homelessness and prostitution in Austin vs Las Vegas, beer being different in Texas, and Prop B. The set starts weak but gets laughs.
Interview: Daylen discusses moving to Austin from Las Vegas/Reno for comedy, his father being a drug dealer in prison, his close relationship with his mother, his younger sisters, and his romantic history including taking a girl to a festival.
- Las Vegas and Austin both have homeless people on corners
- Paid homeless man five dollars for hand job not knowing status
- Beer opening sound different in Texas, makes Nancy Pelosi joke
- Takes tequila shot during interview and gets drunk
- Extended interview becomes longest in show history about dating mishaps
- Stories about buying festival tickets for near-stranger and Miami trip disaster
Set: Hans performs jokes about mission trips for profile pictures, the difference between writing/performing in plays, genetic breeding of Black people during slavery, and white people giving superpowers to those who hate them.
Interview: Hans discusses hitting 20 open mics, going to pool parties with comics, dating a comedian, taking her to a strip club, and his preference for Asian women. He becomes involved in an extended segment with random women kissing him and Isabella Charlton.
- Mission trips are just Americans getting new profile pictures in third world
- If you write and perform play, that's just crazy person doing whatever
- White friend's slavery breeding theory backfired on white people
- Hans kisses random woman from audience who comes on stage
- Isabella Charlton comes on stage, kisses Hans, then kisses random woman
- Tony awards Isabella a spot on Wednesday show and death squad show
Set: Isabella performs jokes about her Indian father and white appearance being mistaken for nanny or kidnapping scenario, and pretending to like scary movies/roller coasters/blue to impress her dad who then thought she was gay.
Interview: Isabella discusses her comedic writing process while walking, her issues with Hans Kim groping a stripper at the red rose, and her reaction to Hans kissing the random audience member.
- Parents brown/white creates double standard: nanny assumption vs kidnapping
- Pretended to like scary movies to impress dad, he thought she was gay
- Brother hated sports/blue/rollercoasters, father suspected him of being gay
- Isabella unexpectedly brought on stage during Hans interview after kissing random woman
- Isabella and Hans kiss while random audience woman also kisses Hans
- Tony offers Isabella a spot on Wednesday show after the segment