KILL TONY Wiki

Kill Tony #495 — Benji Aflalo

📅 February 26, 2021 📍 Miami, FL Improv 🎤 12 comedians ⭐ 2 regulars

Guests: Benji Aflalo

Open on YouTube ↗

Lineup

1

William Montgomery

RegularPanel

Set: One-liner specialist performing fresh material about the Miami Marlins and current events including Biden's Syria strikes. Known for his signature winking segment with the crowd.

Interview: William discussed his time in Miami, swimming in the ocean, playing laser tag, his orange juice diet, and performed his famous winking bit with the audience.

Bits:
  • Miami Marlins so bad their stadium became a morgue during COVID
  • Joe Biden started war within months of presidency
Moments:
  • William performs his signature double-eye wink to the audience
  • Audience votes on whether William should be the band for the night

Set: Material about difficulty accepting apologies, raising a 14-year-old son, terrible parental advice from his father, therapy benefits, gym atmosphere, and body positivity movement critique.

Interview: Christopher discussed living with his mom in Melbourne, his 14-year-old son, building military backpacks for work, seven years of stand-up attempts, and his band Tank Top with his wife.

Bits:
  • Dad told him if kidnapped to say he has AIDS
  • Staff tells him to stop masturbating with wrist weights at gym
Moments:
  • His wife JC Craft unexpectedly called up to perform duet, performs original songs with oozing harmonies
  • Peruvian sound effect played after revealing ethnicity
3

Carter Phillips

Set: First-time performer discussing dislikes including airports, doctors, gym atmosphere and staff corrections. Criticizes body positivity movement and confesses to masturbating with wrist weights.

Interview: Carter revealed he attended music school in Boston for 10 years, plays video games, invented Rezo Gun game, hasn't been in a relationship in 15 years, and receives a kiss from audience member Zoey.

Bits:
  • Can't use gym equipment correctly, staff corrects masturbation with wrist weights
  • Body positivity movement unfair - when he takes off shirt people react negatively
Moments:
  • Audience member Zoey volunteers to kiss Carter, their first kiss in over a decade
  • Tony notes Carter glows differently after the kiss compared to after his set
4

Cody Sylvia

Set: First-time comedian discussing growing up with single mom, fatherhood challenges, wife testing his manhood, and ordering chicken fingers instead of pasta at restaurants.

Interview: Cody is from New Bedford near Boston, works in landscape architecture, grew up with drug-addicted father who died from heroin, has a 1.5-year-old son named Jason, and speaks quietly.

Bits:
  • Growing up single mom taught manhood measured by grocery trip efficiency
  • Wife tests manhood by ordering pasta while he orders chicken fingers
Moments:
  • William notes he cannot understand Cody's speech pattern clearly
5

David Lucas

RegularPanel

Set: Material about condom and mask conflicts during sex, Netflix and Chill distractions, faithfulness in relationships, and absurdist take on women catching men cheating through Groupon activity.

Interview: David roasted Tony extensively about his fashion and appearance, discussed visiting snappers restaurant in Miami, and made jokes about Tony's grooming habits.

Bits:
  • Girl asks to wear mask and condom - can't be both exhausted and no feeling
  • Groupon offers ride-along to catch boyfriend cheating for $89.99
Moments:
  • David launches into extended roast of Tony's appearance and fashion choices
6

Jacob Fuller

Set: First-time comedian discussing frequent masturbation catches by his wife, awkward religious upbringing with baptist-converted-Mormon father, and faking cancer check story to escape detection.

Interview: Jacob is 34, works as risk manager for bank, married 10 years, ex-Mormon who left religion after research, tried IVF three times, has American and French bulldogs, enjoys Latin dancing and karaoke.

Bits:
  • Caught masturbating, pretended to check for cancer with pamphlet excuse
  • Wife embarrassed after catch, 10 years in with no going back
Moments:
  • Jacob sings John Michael Montgomery karaoke song 'Sold' for audience
7

Freddy Fenerty

Set: 23-year-old cancer survivor (diagnosed at 2, relapsed at 7) with leukemia discussing his journey, Make-a-Wish Foundation wig request, and celebrating 16 years cancer-free with sharp timing and delivery.

Interview: Freddy works as sous chef from Staten Island living in Coral Springs for 15 years, started comedy at 20, dates girlfriend 5 months, smokes weed, wears non-slip kitchen shoes, discussed new kitchen attire.

Bits:
  • Celebrates 16 years cancer-free but tumor could drive at 14
  • Make-a-Wish asked what he wants, requested wig so parents love him
Moments:
  • Tony adopts paternal tone toward Freddy, multiple dad references and mentorship vibes
  • Tony and Freddy discuss kitchen shoes with William as pseudo-father figure present
8

Sterm Worm

Set: Returning performer from quarantine Kill Tony episode discussing quitting Cheesecake Factory job after appearing on the show, obsessive pursuit of Tony, crossing paths with Tony on Comedy Store patio, and delusional belief in Tony's significance.

Interview: Stern Worm confirmed being on quarantine episode, quit Cheesecake Factory job, has been following Tony to multiple cities (LA, Austin, Miami), lives in Fort Myers, believes Tony is God's disciple with key to his universe.

Bits:
  • After quarantine episode quit job before Comedy Store even reopened
Moments:
  • Tony denies remembering Stern Worm from Comedy Store encounter
  • Revealed Stern Worm has followed Kill Tony to three cities including this one
  • Stern Worm performs extended rap over beats discussing obsession with Tony
9

Jesse Jacobson

Set: Material about getting first blowjob in seventh grade science class, Jewish background with Jesus Christ comparison, multiple circumcisions from bad doctor, pedophile acknowledgment segue, and Florida Man versus Jesus comparison.

Interview: Jesse is 24, mix of Ginger/Jewish/Filipino heritage making him Puerto Rican, father died of heart attack at 50s, works part-time security at residential Boca Raton, mother dating Black mover, has Puerto Rican girlfriend 6+ months.

Bits:
  • First blowjob in seventh grade science class was pretty good
  • Doctor circumcised him four times, Jesse got to keep the tips
  • Replace Jesus with Florida Man - hangs with prostitutes, gets stabbed, feeds fish
Moments:
  • Tony notes Jesse looks like boy Palamalu from Head and Shoulders commercial
10

Marcus Johnson

Set: First-time comedian discussing childhood friend using meth for abs, attempting to beat him up from childhood habit, friend working out with unconventional equipment like drive shafts and tires.

Interview: Marcus is 32, signed up by his Indian wife, married for almost 3 years after quick wedding due to pregnancy, wife is reporter, from Minnesota with Russian appearance, works in real estate investing.

Bits:
  • Friend got abs from meth, Marcus became jealous and beat him up again
  • Friend curls drive shafts and goes through tires in junk garden workout
11

JC Craft

Set: Material about buying cheap heels at Target, Jesus Christ name confusion, similarities to Jesus (blonde, blue eyes, ghosted father, death by 33), and Florida Man versus Jesus comparison bit.

Interview: JC works at coffee roastery in Melbourne, sells vintage clothing under brand Lemonhead Vintage, afraid of manatees in kayaks, married to Christopher Neal Walker, live 3 hours north in Melbourne where SpaceX operates.

Bits:
  • Name confusion with Jesus Christ, shares blonde hair, blue eyes, ghosted father
  • Replace Jesus with Florida Man - hangs with prostitutes, stabbed, feeds fish
Moments:
  • JC breaks heel climbing stage, discussed breaking shoe from earlier duet with husband
  • JC sings Beauty and the Beast with Tony incorrectly due to pitch issues
12

Michael Lehrer

Panel

Set: Material about being disabled, Dan Marino and Super Bowl comparison, refusing to go to beach, friend offering beach visit, duct taping self to boogie board, and partial standing ovation in Miami.

Interview: Michael appears in Weekend at Bernie's style outfit, got group text from Tony asking about Walmart, responded directly instead of group chat, regular performer with Lou Gehrig's disease diagnosis but continuing stand-up.

Bits:
  • Me and Dan Marino same Super Bowl loss record from Miami
  • Won't go to beach - duct tape me to boogie board for misery
Moments:
  • Gets partial standing ovation from Miami audience
  • Tony jokes about forgetting Michael's pants at hotel