Kill Tony #496 — Jimmy Shubert
Guests: Jimmy Shubert
Lineup
Set: Absurdist observational humor about a Russian punk band called Pussy Riot, parasites from bad sushi at Shoneys, and references to Tiger Woods and the Black National Anthem.
Interview: William discussed getting a parasitic infection from sushi at Shoneys, his love of Yoo-hoos in Miami, and became the musical director for the episode using a keyboard.
- Russian punk band Pussy Riot released a song; hopes grandmother doesn't illegally download it.
- Critics call Pussy Riot's song greatest Christian rock ever with Bible verse lyrics.
- Tiger Woods so bad at driving he ended up in hospital.
- William mentioned kneeling during black national anthem; Tony questioned what that is.
- William became one-man band for entire episode, playing keyboard during other sets.
Set: Severely disrupted set where performer appeared extremely nervous, wore two masks, mentioned a bomb in his pocket, and was unable to deliver coherent material before being cut off.
Interview: Tony interrogated Jonathan about his bizarre behavior including wearing masks, mentioning a bomb, and his severe stage fright, questioning whether he had performed before.
- Performer put on second mask mid-set, mentioned having a bomb in pocket, created absurdist scenario.
- After set ended, Jonathan removed both masks and took off hat, revealing it was a character bit.
Drago
Set: Set about simulation theory, Dragon Ball Z toys, pretending to play clarinet at a school recital, and a Russian judge's metaphor about a glass of water with sewage in it.
Interview: Tony and the panel questioned Drago about his appearance, Joe Rogan connection, his time in Toronto, economics background, and his political refugee status from Canada.
- Convinced he could communicate telepathically with Dragon Ball Z toys and teddy bear.
- Pretended to play clarinet, actually freestyled instead, caused teacher and audience trauma.
- Russian judge's metaphor: one drop of sewage in clear water ruins entire glass.
- Joe Rogan allegedly called in live during Drago's set to critique it.
Set: Humorous stories about dating, friends with benefits, lack of flirting skills, watching couples in parking garages, and his recent accomplishments in comedy.
Interview: Tony praised Charlie's stage presence and command of English, discussed his Brazilian heritage, property management job, drinking habits, and relationships.
- Benefits include learning to exfoliate and finding out moon sign, not actual sex.
- If dating is a game, he's circling arena trying to find parking.
- Watched couple having sex in parking garage, stared for 30 minutes to confirm she was okay.
- Tony and panel praised Charlie's exceptional set quality for only two years experience.
Set: Stories about being the token white guy in South Florida, immigrant questions, moving from Indiana, and not doing stand-up for two years.
Interview: Jack discussed his property management job in health/beauty/wellness sector, his girlfriend Melissa from Bumble, electric scooters, and his two-year break from comedy.
- Always token white guy getting immigrant questions about family origins.
- Friend's mom commented kids speak really good English, as if they shouldn't.
- Jack's girlfriend Melissa was in the audience; Tony made jokes about his electric scooter obsession.
Set: Observational jokes about dab cartridges depleting like life, suffering from manic depressive disorder, and running out of Adderall.
Interview: Tony discussed Dan's heroin addiction recovery, New Jersey background, retirement home event setup job, his girlfriend Melanie, and his mother's death from MRSA eight years prior.
- Dab cartridges like life: amazing at first, empty by end, still trying to get something.
- Manic depressive means sometimes happy, rest of time out of Adderall.
- Discussed his mother's sudden death from walking bronchitis/MRSA at hospital, occurred eight years ago.
Set: Extended set about credit card chip machines, beautiful women, gay hairdressers, and Publix supermarket comparisons.
Interview: Jimmy revealed he's a 56-year-old shoe cobbler with 33-year marriage, collected baseball cards, owns 1980 Trans Am, and his son is an NFL quarterback in Europe.
- Credit card machine interactions with beautiful woman vs. gay hairdresser with different outcomes.
- Woman commented Publix has bigger card machine equipment than his establishment.
- Revealed son is NFL quarterback in European league; Tony was impressed by his positivity and attitude throughout interview.
Set: Dark observational humor about ugly girls not being scared, women over 40 claiming celibacy, and his lack of bedroom stamina and post-coital fatigue.
Interview: Tony and David traded roasts about his appearance, his body shape, his humble lifestyle, where he gets oxtails, and his neighborhood club Cocos in Miami.
- Ugly girls aren't scared, check outside during noises themselves, take trash out.
- Women over 40 claiming celibacy should be publicly hung; clock is up.
- Has zero bedroom stamina, falls asleep after masturbating, looks at hand afterward.
- Tony and David engaged in sustained roasting exchange about his thin frame, clothes, and appearance.
Wick D
Set: First-time set featuring observational humor about wondering what boogers smell like, Warzone video game story, Little Uzi Vert video game reference.
Interview: Tony discussed Wick D's age (28), appearance, background, father's death in car accident, mother's Native American heritage, and his landscaping job.
- Wondered what boogers smell like; imagined what ghost rasta sounds like.
- Little Uzi Vert video game collects face tats and diamonds for forehead.
- First-time performer, Tony praised his potential despite rough start and nervous delivery.
Set: Set about listening to too much Drake, false confidence from Drake music, girlfriend mocking his delusion, and him pretending to be Drake while doing mundane tasks.
Interview: Blake discussed smoking weed before show, four years comedy experience, coaching adult swim masters, video game addiction (RuneScape), former swim career, and his girlfriend who lifeguards.
- Listens to Drake too much, thinks he's Drake, girlfriend mocks his false confidence.
- Drake makes him feel like legend while sweeping; girlfriend reality-checks him.
- William Montgomery provided lip-sync interpretations of Blake's jokes, creating unexpected comedic bit.
Big Mike
Set: Set about bullying prevention: when he defended a friend with facial issues by putting a bully in headlock, only to later realize the bully was intellectually disabled.
Interview: Tony discussed Big Mike's height (6'6"), age (21), recent ankle injury from basketball, college student at FAU, swim coach job, booty call rotation, and workout routine.
- Defended friend from bullying by putting bully in headlock; later realized bully was disabled.
- Tony made extended jokes about Big Mike's height and awkward body proportions throughout interview.