Kill Tony #530 — Justin Martindale
Guests: Justin Martindale
Lineup
Set: Han Kim jokes about being called autistic, being in a long-distance relationship, and comparing his girlfriend to owning a star. Strong material with rapid-fire tags.
Interview: Discussed completing a comedy tour, sleeping with feature Riley Gilmore, headlining shows in Abilene and Sweetwater, and demonstrated freestyle rap abilities.
- Long-distance relationship compared to owning a star certificate.
- Girlfriend always catches him during sex, anal is smelly.
- Hans performs freestyle rap about being on Kill Tony, made of money, and explicit content.
Set: Ryan discusses insecurity and pedophiles, long-distance relationship struggles, and living with girlfriend's parents. Self-deprecating material with dark humor.
Interview: Works at bird biscuit making sandwiches, high school diploma, drinks heavily, new to stand-up, lives with girlfriend and her brother.
- Hung out with pedophiles to seek reassurance as child.
- Girlfriend catches them during sex, anal is smelly.
- Ryan apologizes at end of set, admitting difficult material.
Set: Nat discusses hating nine-to-five jobs and being beaten by his mother in the 1990s. Material about childhood trauma and parental abuse.
Interview: Confirmed previous heroin addiction discussed on show, now unemployed living off savings from drug dealing, made 60k on GameStop stock, enjoys movies and working out.
- Mother beats him, he references MC Hammer 'stop hammer time'.
- Ran out of time due to audience laughing, Tony adds MC Hammer callback.
Set: Luke discusses being white in East Oakland, parents were original gentrifiers, got mistaken for suburban kid. Stories about childhood and neighborhood dynamics.
Interview: From Oakland, visiting Austin for a week, makes pizza, used to deliver pizzas, considering moving to Austin, has been doing stand-up for 5 years.
- White kid from East Oakland, broke into his house.
- Luke performs freestyle rap on stage, receives coaching from Tony.
Set: Nicole performs extended set (5+ minutes) with jokes about dollar tree, Black comedy clubs, Asperger's burger pun, Halloween mother, Vietnamese pumpkins, paying mother for chores.
Interview: Discussed dating blue-eyed white guys, recognizes as Kill Tony royalty, sang national anthem acapella, from San Jose Little Saigon, lives with Vietnamese mother.
- Asperger's syndrome mistaken for burger at comedy club.
- Mother hides under bed on Halloween, gives sticky rice to trick-or-treaters.
- Nicole sings acapella version of Simon & Garfunkel song, reveals crush on Tony.
- Massive ovation, extended set, performs for 15+ minutes total.
Set: Doug jokes about van life and killing girlfriend, looking like YMCA cop, Charleston background, golf and Asian golfers, holes being blurred.
Interview: From Charleston South Carolina, moved to Austin 2 months ago, was unemployed, sold carriage tour tickets, made $30k in Dogecoin, previously lived in van, backpacked Vietnam.
- Van life for killing girlfriend, not travel.
- Looks like YMCA cop saying 'black man get down on ground'.
- Doug performs handstand on stage.
Set: JT discusses Tinder vaccine questions, diseases from Wuhan, being called cracker, and Black dude calling him n-word. Discusses getting n-word from Black person feeling special.
Interview: One-year anniversary of own business installing mini-split AC units with navy veteran buddy, out of debt, plays basketball, divorced wife joined Army and moved to Hawaii.
- Tinder vaccine question, looking for wrong diseases from Wuhan.
Set: Michael performs improvised material after being surprised by Tony. Uses audience suggestions (Alec Baldwin, Gregory Glenn Ross) to create spontaneous jokes about lawyers, brothers, and relationships.
Interview: Former Kill Tony regular, diagnosed with ALS, attempted to walk on stage for first time, stayed to hang out, discussed relationship and voodoo ranger beer.
- Gregory Glenn Ross 'always be closing' reference in spontaneous set.
- Michael walks on stage for first time since ALS diagnosis, receives standing ovation.
Set: William performs jokes about Alec Baldwin, Fight Club, Pixies, running over pedestrians, killing people. Strong closer with rapid-fire callbacks.
Interview: Just back from Los Angeles, lost phone on X2 roller coaster at Six Flags losing 5000 Chick-fil-A points, discussed addiction recovery and raisin bread habit.
- Alec Baldwin killing someone, Dr. Death, Fight Club references.
- Pixies and downloads, running over people, if Baldwin did stand-up he would kill.
- Crowd boos William's request to hold pickles on Chick-fil-A sandwich.
- Raisin bread thrown on stage by audience, multiple times during interview.