Kill Tony #582 — Big Jay Oakerson, Luis J Gomez, Dave Smith
Guests: Big Jay Oakerson · Luis J Gomez · Dave Smith
Lineup
Set: Hans opened with observational jokes about Boston's pride in the Revolutionary War, dirty talk during sex, and escalator issues at the venue. He discussed sharing a hotel room with William Montgomery and the latter's night terrors.
Interview: Tony and the panel discussed Hans's living situation with William Montgomery, his night terrors, and various pet peeves they've argued about during the week.
- Can defeat Revolutionary Army with Home Depot trip and five dollar Mexicans
- Dirty talking during sex: 'I see a lot of myself in you right now about three inches'
- Tony praised Hans for knowing exactly how long a minute is
Set: Josh, a Canadian, joked about excitement for American fast food like Popeye's chicken sandwich, his premature baldness starting at 16, and a controversial joke about being an eight-year-old boy with body hair attracting pedophiles.
Interview: Discussed his four years of stand-up comedy in Montreal, Quebec's French language laws affecting English speakers and businesses, and his work as a professional gambler.
- Someone got stabbed over Popeye's chicken sandwich meaning it's incredibly good
- Had full beard at 15, went bald at 16, full bush at 8 years old
- Eight-year-old with full pubic hair attracting pedophile attention
- Big Jay praised Josh's joke about the stabbing and Popeye sandwich as very well-written
- Discussion of Quebec's Bill 101 making English illegal in businesses
Set: Frankie discussed smoking weed and edibles that hit unexpectedly like an alcoholic father, growing up in the ghetto and bad at slang, misunderstanding 'cottonmouth,' and fear of birds and clowns.
Interview: Discussed three years of stand-up in San Diego at The Comedy Store, struggling to get stage time, his work as a doorman at American Comedy Company, and offering to perform at Big Jay's New Year's Eve show.
- Edibles like having an alcoholic father—never know when they'll hit you
- Thought cottonmouth meant eating out a black woman for 20 years
- People scared of birds get excluded by friends at end of night
- Big Jay offered Frankie a New Year's Eve headlining spot and Luis offered an hour and a half feature spot
Set: Kim performed about shopping at Forever 21 at 32, blood-covered cheap boots, fast fashion, being scared of birds, and controversial jokes about clowns and rape.
Interview: Tony revealed Kim was on the second episode of Kill Tony nine and a half years ago, discussed her marriage, her voice, and her experiences at various Skank Fest shows.
- Buying clothes at Forever 21 at 32 is sad, blood-covered $3 boots
- If scared of birds, friends leave you without you at end of night
- Controversial: if scared of clowns, you got raped—get to gym and fix it
- Tony revealed Kim was on the very second episode of Kill Tony ever, nearly 10 years ago
- Discussion of Kim beating up Oliver Costello at previous Skank Fest
Set: Alec opened with dark joke about people in wheelchairs, then discussed a Texas man caught with 58 terabytes of child porn and the math comparing it to Moon landing storage.
Interview: Alec revealed he's a correctional officer in Portland, Oregon, discussed prison conditions, transgender inmates, and controversial stories about prisoner violence.
- Wheelchair users at venue—wishes he had a Yelp Kratom theater seat
- Texas man with 58TB child porn equals 14,500 films; Moon landing had 1GB
- Tony made a dark callback about Alec teaching people how to store child porn
- Extended discussion of Oregon prison transgender housing policies and sexual assault potential
Set: Ali joked about having a weird voice from fat parents who always had mouths full, her loser parents, her dad smoking 40 inches of cigar daily, and mashed potato accent.
Interview: Discussed upcoming tour, her boyfriend who does podcast engineering/editing, moving to New York possibly, and her weird snack habit of eating baby food.
- Fat parents with full mouths affected voice—mashed potato accent from formative years
- Dad smokes five cigars daily, 40 inches total—smoking length of modest couch
- Tony noted Ali was youngest regular ever on Kill Tony, made regular before 21
- Ali mentioned new podcast project in development, can't discuss details
Set: Jonah opened about her Navy boyfriend recently returning from deployment and her belief she has chlamydia, liking dirty sex, and her boyfriend wiping fingers in her hair after fingering her ass.
Interview: Second time performing, very nervous throughout. Discussed being from Orange County, working in dietary at a retirement home, playing clarinet, doing yoga, and took a plane to Vegas alone.
- Boyfriend in Navy recently back from deployment; pretty sure she has chlamydia
- Boyfriend wipes fingers in her hair after fingering her ass
- Jonah visibly shaking during set; panel discussed how nervousness/trembling is attractive on stage
- Louis and panel became noticeably attracted to Jonah's nervous energy during interview
Set: John discussed coming from a sheep farming family, his dad seeing aliens that were actually an interracial couple, wanting to join military because wife sleeps with others, and a cute cat paw behavior his girlfriend calls him a bitch for.
Interview: Second time performing, plumber's apprentice from Santa Rosa with 4-year girlfriend who's a banker. Discussed jumping from a 2-story balcony during a hotel encounter in Mexico.
- Dad saw aliens but it was just interracial couple; farm family doesn't fuck sheep
- Wife sleeps with other guys; wants to join military to escape feelings
- Does cute cat paw behavior; girlfriend calls him a bitch
- John's water bottle got progressively more crumpled from panel crushing it during interview
- Story about jumping from balcony became increasingly incoherent; panel suggested it was fabrication
Set: Jill thanked the crowd for making her rich with Gold Bond powder sales, discussed being mistaken for lesbian, matching with Buddhist lesbian on Tinder, and the woman's weird behavior and cryptic emoji messages.
Interview: Discussed being a divorce lawyer, runs Four Corners Comedy Festival, recently lost weight, moving to Phoenix and Las Vegas in November, and previously produced shows including Toxic Femininity.
- Invested in Gold Bond powder before weekend; crowd made her rich off sales
- Matched with Buddhist lesbian on Tinder; long paragraphs, cryptic emojis, silent lunch
- Lesbian said 'my energy doesn't match your energy'; Jill ghosted her—energies match now
- Panel joked Jill looks like Big Jay and has 'Vegas tits' that fade quickly
- Tony revealed Jill is divorce lawyer; panel made various comments about her appearance and personality
Set: William opened with joke about bodies in Lake Mead being shitty comics, Taylor Swift writing breakup songs about him, her blackface bedroom fetish, and Shrek likely rejecting Jesus's teachings.
Interview: William complained about not being listed on the flyer or getting a welcome, apologized by Luis, discussed weight loss, recent bathroom trapping incident, and upcoming fight with Nate Diaz in April in Vegas.
- Bodies found in Lake Mead are shitty comics; Taylor Swift writes more breakup songs
- Taylor did blackface in bedroom as fetish; made him call her Lawrence Taylor
- Shrek rejects Jesus teachings in DreamWorks universe—proof he's in hell
- Louis hugged William instead of beating him up as Tony had considered arranging
- William mentioned being trapped in bathroom for three hours before the show
- William can now almost see his penis after weight loss after 10 years