Kill Tony #618 — Trevor Wallace, Brian Simpson
Guests: Trevor Wallace · Brian Simpson
Lineup
Set: Hans performs a bit about an ad featuring an Asian firefighter and a woman, critiquing diversity in emergency services with edgy commentary about safety and privilege.
Interview: Hans discusses the ad format change and his demographic (drunks and sex perverts). Panel praises his outfit and performance, noting his consistent improvement and experience.
- Diversity in firefighting ad makes him want to die; prefers Nazi generations of food security.
- Safe spaces for white people already exist in Europe; if you want that life, go to England.
- Hans Kim defended his regular spot for the third consecutive time, defeating Uncle Laser in the challenge match.
Set: Kyle opens with family dysfunction including a drug-addicted father, an bald brother with cancer, and jokes about white people's genetics and poor family traits.
Interview: First-timer from San Diego working at research institute. Discussion about his brother's cancer death, his father's substance abuse, and a story about losing a butt plug during sex in Tijuana.
- Father was responsible drug addict, only used drugs on weekends when he had custody of Kyle.
- Brother is 25 and completely bald; the joke being cancer is rough, not genetics.
- Lost butt plug in Tijuana during sex; had to quickly extract it before girl's muscles clamped down.
- Extended interview about butt plug story; Tony expressed skepticism about whether it actually happened based on Kyle's 'liar's face.'
Angel
Set: Angel discusses coming from Boston, making Juneteenth jokes, being part Puerto Rican and Salvadorian, observations about regional differences and weather, and seeing roaches in Boston apartments.
Interview: Angel is a medical organ transport driver from Boston visiting for the show. Drove organs for transplants, previously did landscaping. Cat named Harvey Dent after Two-Face. Arrived Saturday, leaving next day.
- Boston has more deers than Mexicans; Puerto Ricans compare to roaches coming out of kitchen doors.
- Weather up north is bipolar and cold; down south too hot, brain cooked, sees beds everywhere to lay down.
- Angel mentioned saving organ about to thaw in the room, creating awkward tension with the interview.
Set: David performs a joke criticizing the word 'gaslighting,' discussing how people prefer old-fashioned lying and the necessity of lying to partners during sex for their satisfaction.
Interview: David is retired regular cashing in on retirement package benefit. Discusses his sobriety and return to performing. Extended roast battle with panel about his appearance and outfit choices.
- Women use 'gaslighting' to sound fancy; prefer old-school lying. Must tell girlfriend she has best pussy ever.
- Extended roast battle between David and Trevor about appearance, Dennis Rodman shirt, and various insults.
- David announced upcoming tour dates in Poughkeepsie, NYC, and Boston.
Set: Kam discusses a crack-smoking basketball coach who believed in him, and a story about a Target coworker inspired by Kam to chase NBA dreams at age 45.
Interview: Newest regular, just got hired to work at the Mothership. Wearing Mothership gear and new shoes for professionalism. Panel celebrates his rise and consistent, charismatic delivery.
- Basketball coach smoked crack, believed in him; head coach warned him not to listen to crack-smoking coach.
- 45-year-old Target coworker inspired by Kam to chase NBA dreams, a delusional but sincere life goal.
- Kam shook hands with Trevor Wallace after Trevor appeared nervous around him, creating memorable on-stage moment.
- Tony praised Kam's consistent performance and positioning as unstoppable rising star on Kill Tony.
Set: Sai opens by insulting the crowd, discusses plane crashes as opportunity for bucket list items, and jokes about punching kids because his parents beat him.
Interview: First-timer from year-and-a-half of stand-up. Tony criticizes his opening insult of crowd, poor storytelling. Sai admits to cocaine use across countries; Tony deems him unbearable and removes him without a joke book.
- Plane crash is chance to punch a kid from your seat because you always lose fights with adults.
- Tony harshly criticized Sai's set as one of worst performances, noting he called crowd ugly and got sidetracked by a cough.
- Tony removed Sai from stage without awarding a joke book, telling him to prepare better and leave.
Set: Daniel discusses his aunt's murder featured in Netflix's Confession Killer, interrupting sex to watch family tragedy, and jokes about administering Plan B to his girlfriend without his conservative mother knowing.
Interview: Four-year comic from Austin. Tony criticizes him for being self-absorbed and doing his own interview. Daniel appears distracted and defensive, eventually told never to sign up again.
- Aunt murdered in 1979 in Netflix series; interrupted sex to watch family tragedy, couldn't help cumming.
- Mother thinks Plan B is murder; given it thousands of times making him a serial killer.
- Tony removed Daniel from stage, instructing him never to sign up for the show again.
Set: Nico's first-ever stand-up performance discusses his Boston upbringing, progressive father's homophobic attitudes about flip-flops, and observations about regional fashion and sexuality.
Interview: First-time ever on stage. From Revere, Massachusetts where Joe Rogan grew up. Works in real estate development and family auto body shop. Getting married in August, came to Austin for bachelor party, stayed extra night to perform.
- Growing up in Boston, flip-flops were for gay people; sound of them walking was distinctly homosexual.
- Nico revealed he came to Austin for bachelor party, stayed extra night specifically to perform on Kill Tony.
- Tony addressed his fiancée Kelly on camera before commercial break, Nico gave apology for porn comments made during interview.
- Nico awarded big joke book by Bones Eye after strong first performance.
Set: Brett's first-ever stand-up discusses intuition with partners, wife's lack of laughter at his first stage appearance, which occurred at her funeral.
Interview: First-timer who was married 15 years. Wife died from accidental overdose (ketamine and Xanax mix) in March 2021. Single dad to two kids ages 13 and 15. From Dallas, originally Minnesota. Works at TopGolf.
- Wife couldn't laugh at his jokes, not good timing to start performing at her funeral.
- Brett revealed wife died from accidental ketamine/Xanax overdose in March 2021 while he was making pork chops for dinner.
- Tony praised Brett's likability and encouraged him to do more comedy despite heavy personal loss.
- Brett awarded big joke book and congratulated for compelling first performance.
Set: Anastasia discusses hiring sex workers for various services, the absurdity of men asking if women came during sex, and the business of lying to male partners for money.
Interview: Return appearance, first time was about a year ago. Postpartum doula and newborn care specialist, travels the states. Trained in CPR, saved toddler from choking. Does hiking, poetry, and pastel art. Single, previously in 10-year relationship ended by COVID lockdown.
- Sex workers better at faking orgasms and praising men because they get paid for the deception.
- Men don't understand women's silence about orgasms; men announce it loudly while women stay quiet.
- Anastasia mentioned saving baby from pyloric stenosis choking incident during her caregiving work.
- Anastasia already has big joke book from previous appearance, awarded again this performance.
Set: William performs jokes about meeting haters at age three at Silver Springs, a submarine missing tourists, Titanic trutherism, and an Arizona bear attack with commentary on aggression.
Interview: William most-appeared regular, record holder for appearances and new minutes. Discussed early childhood encounter at Silver Springs with questioners, commercial sponsorship by Silver Springs, previous substance abuse, sobriety, and bringing drunk dog on set.
- Worst thing: meeting haters at age three; submarine tourists story references Red Band's mother.
- Considering Titanic truther; iceberg hard to avoid in big ocean, argues unprovoked bear attack was stupidity.
- William announced basal cell carcinoma on neck requiring laser removal Wednesday, callback to Uncle Laser earlier.
- William shared story about getting dog drunk on tequila shots after previous episode about animal cruelty allegations.
- Panel praised William's continued weirdness despite sobriety, compared to other sober comedians like Theo Von and Tim Dillon.