Kam Patterson

Kam does 50+ seconds about a female friend in hospital beaten by boyfriend (black eye, broken ribs, fractured leg). He asks 'What did we learn?' She replies 'Don't date your favorite comedian.' Ends with: 'That's all I got.'

• Friend tells comedians they caused her boyfriend to beat her

Cam does a story about his gay friend Tyrone Jones where they both had sex with the same woman (Eiffel Tower), and Cam's confusion about Tyrone staying hard knowing he's gay.

• If straight man has multiple gay friends, they plotting to get him in dark room.
• High school story doing Eiffel Tower with friend and girl, then friend came out.

Set about having a girlfriend for 8 months without making her orgasm, then finally succeeding after taking mushrooms. Story about hearing a white guy having loud sex with his girlfriend's roommate, feeling ancestral pressure to perform better.

• Eight months dating girlfriend with no orgasm, kept asking and going to sleep
• Ancestors (Rosa Parks, MLK, Thurgood Marshall) grab his back, makes him put shoes on and perform

No set recap for this appearance.

Kam did material about phone sex with girlfriend, specifically her pulling out an 11-inch green dildo. He included prop comedy elements and magic tricks, making things disappear and reappear.

• Phone sex girlfriend revealed 11-inch green dildo, compared to Hulk's penis.
• Never seen the green dildo before, wants to cut it in half to have two his size.

Veteran comedian performing material about his cousin's wedding, conflict with the maid of honor, being told to leave groomsmen table, and his Googleable fame contradicted by search results.

• Maid of honor told him to stop bothering groomsmen table
• Woman asked 'who the fuck even is he' so he said 'Google me'
• Googled himself and found 'worst comedian of all time'

Kam does a St. Patrick's Day special joking that it's the gayest holiday ever and an excuse for drunk white people to touch him. He claims leprechauns are gay and spells 'leprechaun' as 'LGBTQ' before the time runs out.

• St. Patrick's Day is gayest holiday; white people get drunk to touch you.
• Leprechaun spelled is LGBTQ; that's gay as hell.

Patterson performed topical material about Trump hiring a 13-year-old with cancer as Secret Service head, made jokes about his grandmother's reaction, and discussed child soldiers.

• Trump hired 13-year-old with cancer as Secret Service head
• Grandmother's insensitive reaction to disabled Secret Service chief

Theory about cuckolding starting from childhood trauma witnessing mother during thunderstorm; commentary on cuckold culture in white communities.

• Cuckold fetish origin theory: seven-year-old witnessing mother getting dominated during thunderstorm
• His penis is not huge so would feel weird in cuckold scenario if he pulls it out

Kam discusses inspiring young black men through comedy, tells story about drug dealer turned pimp after seeing his set, making joke about transition from drug trafficking to sex trafficking being worse.

• Guy goes from drug dealing to pimping after seeing his comedy, worse upgrade

No set recap for this appearance.

Kam does a new minute about his ex-girlfriend being ugly, expressing that he prefers dating unattractive women because they're loyal. Discusses an ex who wouldn't eat until he got his food, later finding out her ex-boyfriend beat her.

• Prefers dating ugly women because they won't leave him and are easier to control.
• Ex wouldn't eat until he got food; later found out her ex beat her so he's grateful.

Christmas homecoming with money, playing games with homeless people, family charades dysfunction, girlfriend's Rubik's Cube challenge.

• Played Hunger Games with homeless people using chicken wings
• Family can't play charades properly, uncle mimes cocaine
• Girlfriend's 20x20 Rubik's Cube for sexual favors

Opening expresses anger at Jason Vest's graphic content; entire set about crackheads in his family providing phone number and asking for cash app; raw and energetic delivery.

• Has crackheads in family with phone number; they ask for cash app to buy crack
• Crackheads are different from street encounters; personal relationships with addicts

Kam discusses LA fires, brick chimneys surviving while houses burn, and jokes about Black people and Asians being happy during the disaster.

• Only brick chimneys survive fires; should build houses from those
• Asian people happy during fires; no dogs seen evacuating

No set recap for this appearance.

Storytelling about Black History Museum visit in DC, white woman at immigration exhibit, cafeteria serving fried chicken and collard greens. Reflexive observations on race and culture.

• Thick white woman crying at immigration exhibit, whistled at her to cheer up
• Museum cafeteria only sold fried chicken and collard greens stereotypically

Patterson joked about auditioning for drug dealer role, laughing at gay man reading girlfriend lines, and hiding homophobia through acting skill.

• Auditioned for drug dealer, gay guy reading girlfriend lines made me laugh, proved I hid homophobia well

International superstar discusses being childhood bully, school suspension. Father called during principal's meeting, dismisses bullying of 'midgets' and hangs up. Core joke about lack of parental discipline.

• Father asks 'who is he bullying, midgets' then hangs up on principal

Regular performing weekly, material about Colorado Buffalo game mistaken for recruit, Mike Tyson fight aftermath, cameraman's reaction to Tyson's exposed ass.

• White people thought he was recruit at Colorado Buffalo game wearing jacket.
• Mike Tyson showing ass before fight was straightest thing ever; cameraman gay.

Ex calls about new girlfriend, jokes about dick getting hard at wedding bombing scenario. Discusses toxic personality. References Akron, LeBron James, and therapy practice.

• Ex threatens to bomb wedding with bomb strapped to chest, dick gets hard
• LeBron James only fourth greatest player, not second like previously thought

No set recap for this appearance.

Material about recently released cousin sharing embarrassing childhood stories, pillow-humping incident with Usher music, and cousin's inappropriate behavior toward women.

• Cousin reveals humiliating childhood pillow-humping incident to new friends.
• Cousin believed choking women during intimacy was throat massage.

Set about sister coming out as gay to non-progressive father, father's response about hell, and bit about Hitler killing his son, ending abruptly.

• Sister tells dad she's gay; dad says love her but she's going to hell
• Wonders if Hitler went to heaven since he killed his son

No set recap for this appearance.

Kam discusses not understanding art, seeing sculptures of flaccid penises, questioning why anyone would sculpt themselves with a soft penis, and jokes about small dicks being smart.

• Why would anyone sculpture a soft dick with pubes? That's murder-worthy.
• Small dicks back then mean they were smart; he'd have gone to Harvard.

Kam performs a new minute about Reading, Pennsylvania being terrible, wanting to have sex with Amish women, visiting an Amish farm and finding them ugly, and a story about Marshawn Lynch being called OJ Simpson by an Amish tour guide.

• Amish people are ugly as hell, inbred looking, doesn't want to fuck them
• Amish tour guide said a girl got raped when asked about Black Amish people

Kam discusses smoking weed in Oklahoma, friend drinking entire bottle of THC syrup with skull and crossbones warning, friend became nonverbal autistic and shit himself.

• Friend drank entire THC syrup bottle despite skull and crossbones warning, became autistic

Kam performs observational material about being gay to like men since women have assholes too, blindfolding gay men with different assholes, first experience fucking girl in ass at 17, and commentary on lesbians with punchline 'what's better than one pussy, two'.

• Gotta really be gay to like men, women got assholes too
• Could blindfold gay guy, show two assholes, he wouldn't know difference
• What's better than one pussy, two, you know what I'm saying

Attempted acting auditions without success, bought 2003 Acura as 'thug car', contrasts old cars with new beeping 'pussy' cars, car broke down requiring screwdriver to start.

• Old 2003 cars are thugs; new cars are pussy with excessive beeping.
• 2024 Tesla beeps constantly demanding seatbelt; 03 Acura wants to die with you.

Told abortion joke two years ago, now has two-year-old son, claims son is pride and joy, then jokes about killing the baby and dead babies.

• Tried everything to abort son—Plan Bs, Six Flags, papaya daily
• Son is pride and joy, now joking about killing him
• Fuck that baby nigga, dead as fuck, kill dumbass babies

Kam performs minute about Mormon gun collection, silencers on accountant's guns, and concern about casual gun violence.

• Mormon accountant has silencers on multiple guns

First time in New York, calls city melting pot, actually segregated by race, smells like piss, saw rat eating homeless man, rats, subway, rude people, pizza is good, kill yourself.

• New York called melting pot, actually segregated Chinatown Harlem
• Saw rat eating homeless man on subway
• New York people rude, only good thing is pizza

Experimental material read from W9 tax form about Kansas City barbecue, Chicago, Patrick Mahomes, Taylor Swift, and admitting to being broke and going to jail about taxes.

• Kansas City has good barbecue and Patrick Mahomes is very Black
• Paying taxes is unfamiliar scary concept that will result in jail

Topical material about 2024 election, voting like picking women, Kamala Harris and Joe Biden. High-energy performance with strong crowd reactions.

• Votes with dick like picking women - last couple years would be gay
• Wouldn't let 82-year-old grandma run country or drive car
• Kamala Harris only fucks people who help her career

Kam did material about being in Phoenix with hot weather and pretty women, theorizing God turned up the heat to make women take clothes off, and a joke about a long-term relationship with his cellmate.

• Phoenix has prettiest women because God turned heat up to strip
• Fighting in Phoenix: no point, you'll get Indian burn from heat

Stories about guided tours in Green Bay and Louisville Slugger factory, tour guide respect levels, and telling kids they won't make MLB.

• Tour guy in Louisville disrespected tour by acting indifferent
• Told baseball kids they won't make MLB unless Dominican

Cam performs 60-second bit about attending tractor pull in Fort Wayne Indiana, observing Amish people, and interactions with white crowd who warned he wasn't the target of their booing.

• At tractor pull in Fort Wayne, white people welcomed him; one said 'don't worry, we not booing you' sarcastically.
• Saw Amish for first time in Florida; they reacted with 'oh fuck, it's a nigga'; wants to have Amish sex.

Kam performs about Appleton Wisconsin being terrible, contrasts with great Madison, discusses a boot-on-face incident, Kia boys in Milwaukee, and homelessness. Strong misdirection and callbacks throughout.

• Appleton Wisconsin so bad even homeless don't want to be there
• White guy in Appleton called him dirty, Tony notes he's 'becoming somebody'

No set recap for this appearance.

Complex family story involving step-siblings, crack baby cousin kissed in childhood, cousin later transitions to male, explores complicated feelings about the situation.

• Cousin transitions to male after first kiss, now daps up identical twin
• Father says hell has gay side and straight side for family

Kam discusses performing in Spokane, Washington, which is 88% white and known for suicide rates. He jokes about rich friends who own giraffes and jokes about getting his dick sucked after bombing.

• Spokane Washington terrible; when asked what they do there, someone said suicide.
• Rich friend owns two giraffes, they bred, sold baby to zoo.

Kam's set about rocks not being food, visiting Springfield Missouri, and Bass Pro Shop. Discusses archery hall of fame having no black people.

• Rocks are friends not food reference to eating rocks.
• Springfield's main attraction is Bass Pro Shop not anything interesting.

Kam discussed Diddy beating woman in elevator video, his auntie's advice about not beating women on camera, and struggling to tuck a towel while praising Diddy's towel-tucking technique.

• Auntie's advice not to beat women on camera
• Can't tuck a towel but praising Diddy's technique

Jokes about Biden signing random bills including lynching hate crime bill, college scam including special ed students, graduation experience.

• Biden just signs random bills including lynching hate crime bill too late
• College is biggest scam, special ed students paying is biggest finesse

Cam performs 2+ minute set about getting girlfriend pregnant, discussing wanting abortion, joking about murderous intent, condoms, and baby as doctor. Heavy use of n-word throughout.

• Having a kid; gonna kill that nigga, obliterate that nigga
• Baby on stomach asking mom not to kill it; she won't listen cause he's a liar
• Found condoms; won't have this problem again; wished he had a coupon

Kam tells story about uncle's crack relapse, beating from young robbers in Atlanta, claiming crack saved his life when robbers let him smoke before going home.

• Uncle got beaten by Atlanta robbers but crack saved his life

Cam jokes about fucking old women, problems with giving homeless people haircuts ruins their panhandling success, compares removing homeless haircut to messing up their uniform, aggressive humor throughout.

• Barber giving homeless people haircuts messes up their panhandling uniform
• If homeless guy has better haircut than you, punch his ass

Cam discussed Drake following his girlfriend on Instagram and how he's already lost, compared himself to Guardians of the Galaxy versus Avengers (having a raccoon, tree, and regular guy versus real superheroes).

• Drake followed girlfriend; even if she chose him she'd have bad judgment
• Guardians of Galaxy (raccoon, tree, regular guy) versus Avengers (real superheroes)

Kam discusses living around white people in Austin for a year, comparing how they steal (via government write-offs) versus how he used to steal, contrasts breaking into houses with understanding equity, and reflects on his friend with probation restrictions.

• White people steal smart via government write-offs and tax deductions
• Friend can't leave Florida for probation; understanding systemic consequences

Recently in Utah; discusses how Utah sided with union during Civil War but has low Black population. Compares Utah mountains to Mount Everest. Only knows three mountains including Splash Mountain.

• Utah sided with union during Civil War but has low Black population; they don't want us
• Only knows three mountains: Mount Everest, Kilimanjaro, and Splash Mountain

Kam told dark jokes about witnessing someone die on a Bird scooter, wanting to use the scooter himself, comparing ways to die, and his father asking about OnlyFans.

• Saw someone die on Bird scooter, first thought was if broken, they throw it away
• If God told you three ways to die, scooter death would be funniest
• Father at 64 discovering OnlyFans will break the family finances

Kam performs about his new haircut making him look like a young man instead of a cool street man, compares himself to various pop culture references, and discusses his auntie being in and out of the hospital.

• New haircut makes him look like High School Musical basketball player or SpongeBob's friend.

Set about having a threesome where he moved between two rooms, one woman's vagina being better than the other, and wearing socks and slides during sex.

• Had threesome where he ran between rooms naked with 14-inch dick because one woman's vagina better than other.
• Wearing socks and slides during sex is acceptable, going fully naked is gay.

Kam performed a minute about pre-ejaculation at 17, asking his dad for advice who called it gay, fucking the same girl and keep nutting on himself. He included a thought about a woman wearing a scarf when it wasn't cold: 'Bitch, your neck ain't that cold.'

• At 17 kept pre-ejaculating on himself; girlfriend called him whore; girl was too much for his dick.
• Saw lady with scarf on warm day: 'Bitch, your neck ain't that cold.'

No set recap for this appearance.

Kam performed a regular set about dating a white woman raised in the hood who says the N-word more than him, wanting to bring her to meet his parents, and an explanation of how white men can earn the right to say the N-word.

• White girlfriend says N-word more than him, dad would have to sleep with her too
• White men can earn right to say N-word by getting penetrated by big black gay man

Kam performs 59 seconds about making a cop laugh during a show, asking if the cop would let him go if pulled over with prostitutes, weed, and a gun. Dark material with surprising punchline.

• Made cop laugh during set; asked if he'd let me go if pulled over blackout drunk with prostitutes and weed

Story about homeboy not knowing Kam was a weirdo until seeing him on Kill Tony, then criticizing him for repeating a joke. Self-aware and relatable.

• Homeboy watched Kill Tony, learned Kam was a weirdo, then criticized repeated joke.

Kam tells story about cousin Natron taking him to strip club at 15, strippers being excited to see him and sexual contact despite his young age.

• Cousin Natron named by uncle who predicted NFL player or prisoner; became both.
• Strippers blew raspberries on him sexually at age 15; he came twice.

Kam discusses masturbating without his phone by using his imagination, but his imagination isn't as strong as when he was younger. He talks about needing more extreme content and discovers he likes choking himself and playing with his nipples.

• At 10, just nipples got him hard; at 24, needs extreme fetish content
• When phone broken, free hand unsure what to do, tried nipple play

Comedy about dick size and girlfriend responses, opening with white girls and sexual humor. Set included misdirections and crowd energy.

• Girlfriend says his dick is perfect for her, but he wants it dangerous

Kam does 60 seconds about traveling with Tony, Phoenix show (no Black people, welcomed), NBA dreams (too short, beat by 47-year-old uncle who was a crackhead), and dad beating him by crackhead.

• Phoenix show had no Black people; welcomed him like he was missing
• Too short for NBA; beaten by 47-year-old crackhead uncle
• Father clarified uncle wasn't just former crackhead; used crack before game

Set about matching with muscular woman on Tinder at 3am, discovering she looked like The Rock in wig, researching if she was trans, feeling safe in her arms during sex, getting bench pressed out of her.

• Matched muscular woman on Tinder, discovered she was like The Rock in wig.
• Researched if she was trans by feeling for Adam's apple during missionary sex.
• Felt safe in her strong arms, she bench pressed him out of her during sex.

Funny bit about almost fucking porn stars in LA, blames Uncle Laser for cockblocking, porn star's dad texted about suicide, describes it as tragic and darkly comedic.

• Almost got with porn stars in LA but Uncle Laser prevented them from coming inside house

Kam describes his first surfing experience where he couldn't swim well, his gay surfing instructor's advances in the ocean, a beautiful sunset, and atheist fears.

• I can swim very good for a black guy, can do a doggy paddle but y'all got me beat
• Scared with atheist in ocean who didn't believe in miracles during beautiful sunset moment

Kam performed about learning to surf in Malibu with a gay instructor, beautiful sunset moment, and atheist discussion.

• Gay surfing instructor, atheist in ocean, sunset moment

Kam tells an emotional story about his friend who encouraged him to do comedy instead of drug dealing, who was on FaceTime for his big video with Tony and cried when he succeeded.

• Friend encouraged him to do comedy instead of selling drugs

Kam discussed exaggerating hardship when talking to women to seem sympathetic, then meeting a Mexican woman from actual poverty who had no roof on her house growing up, making him realize his struggles were trivial.

• Exaggerates sleeping on couch/floor to impress women until met Mexican woman with no roof

Kam discusses wanting to be an actor and picking roles carefully; references Snowfall character getting raped after robbing main character, noting that guy can't be Batman due to being typecast.

• Snowfall actor got raped so he can't be Batman; first role determines you forever

Kill Tony regular delivering brand-based material about liking rocks, police interaction asking his name, finds big rock, jokes about Tyler's sexual skills.

• Every time does set someone yells rock joke; threatening to stone audience
• Cop kept asking name while jaywalking; ended with rock question

Soulmate with ugly face, dating someone with eyes too far apart, joke about cutting out eyes for love, missionary sex drowning risk.

• Soulmate with great heart but eyes too far apart
• Cutting eyes out for true love reference

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

Regular performs about giving homeless crackhead woman money, subsequent hug with unwanted physical contact, her schizophrenic breakdown, and sexual encounter aftermath.

• Gives crackhead money, she hugs him, rubs pussy hand on back
• Woman has schizophrenic breakdown, forgets him mid-hug, pushes him away
• Ends set claiming sexual encounter aftermath as punchline

No set recap for this appearance.

Kam told a story about a girl from middle school who became a top OnlyFans model, and him being faster than her. Set included hood vernacular and observational humor.

• Girl sucking dick at eleven; now top OnlyFans model living dreams.
• I'm faster than her; girl invited him to baseball field.

Strong set about getting a therapist (thanking white women), lying to pretty therapist about his problem, comparing his penis to a Bugatti, and the difficulty of putting gas in a Bugatti.

• Therapist is pretty so he lies; says his problem is dick too big.
• Hard to put gas in a Bugatti; his penis compares to pressure washer.

Kam jokes about hating his niece bragging about passing third grade when he failed it twice, can't read, makes it hard to learn to read when you can't read.

• Hates niece bragging about third grade when he failed it twice
• Can't read, makes learning to read nearly impossible

Kam opens with his sister being 6'2" and 280 lbs, tells a story about her calling him because her boyfriend hit her, and his response of calling her a slut. Material uses heavy profanity and racial language throughout.

• Sister is 6'2", 280 lbs and gets beaten by boyfriend
• Finding light-skinned women in the crowd and using pickup line

Kam did a 60-second set about Twitter/X, finding news through porn, and watching interracial gangbang videos.

• Found Russian-Ukraine news scrolling Twitter between porn videos

Describes being profiled as a drug dealer on 6th Street by a crackhead who kept accusing him of selling crack. Ends with the punchline that he actually did sell them crack.

• Crackhead on 6th Street accuses him of selling crack; he admits he did.

Kam performs as a 'scientist' studying which race performs oral sex best, claiming a white girl changed his life and now he appreciates The Office.

• White girl's oral sex so good, now appreciates The Office and Michael Scott.

Kam performs about unprotected sex during COVID, getting chlamydia while vaccinated, and mistaking it for vaccine side effects. High-energy delivery with explicit language and personal sexual narrative.

• Had unprotected sex during COVID; got chlamydia; doctor blamed vaccine side effects.

No set recap for this appearance.

Comedy about envying lesbians who can choose partners, his small penis, and comparing adding a friend with a bigger penis to his girlfriend calling tech support.

• Envies lesbians because they get to choose their partner's penis size
• If girlfriend says go deeper, he calls his friend Daquan who has bigger dick

Cam Patterson performed autobiographical material about being the only one crying during a car shooting incident, gang retaliation dynamics, and surrendering to end violence.

• Was only one crying when car got shot up during drive-by.
• Gang members always come back when they shoot at you seeking retaliation.
• Took shirt off and surrendered to stop the shooting.

Energetic set about high school sports and teammate coming out as gay. Questions whether the butt-slapping was a gay thing or basketball thing.

• Teammate slaps ass during games, asks if that was gay or basketball

Kam discusses a crack-smoking basketball coach who believed in him, and a story about a Target coworker inspired by Kam to chase NBA dreams at age 45.

• Basketball coach smoked crack, believed in him; head coach warned him not to listen to crack-smoking coach.
• 45-year-old Target coworker inspired by Kam to chase NBA dreams, a delusional but sincere life goal.

Kam performed a strong set about moving to Austin, finding only six black people there (all crackheads), and making a joke about crack dust creating more crackheads.

• Only seen six black people in Austin and they're all crackheads who want him to join.
• Crackheads make other crackheads by blowing crack dust in your face.

Kam performs about his racist older brother's warnings against dating white women, a high school relationship with a white girl, and her mistaking his hair pick for a knife.

• Brother forbade dating white women; could date but not commit
• Girlfriend mistakes hair pick for knife, he stabs her

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.

No set recap for this appearance.