Kill Tony #679 — Matt Rife
Guests: Matt Rife
Lineup
Set: Political commentary on women's rights and dating preferences, with misogynistic takes on women's intelligence and Asian masculinity versus American masculinity.
Interview: Hans discussed his girlfriend traveling in Europe for three weeks, Japanese massage porn preferences, and the appeal of the deception/seduction aspect of Asian adult content versus American content.
- Women shouldn't run for president after just getting voting rights
- Women want confident American men who attack Iraq, not careful Asian boys
- Rare live apology from Hans Kim mid-interview
Set: Stories about Austin street characters, a broken lighter incident, a man beating a tree, comparisons to Dae Chappelle, and a shocking closing about shooting his own father.
Interview: Tony and Matt complimented Ben's smile and vest; Ben clarified he was looking at Matt during the set; discussion of dentist visits with a 9/11 joke; Ben revealed he's been doing stand-up for one year and three months and works day labor.
- Broke guy couldn't give dollar to someone who called him Great Value Dave Chappelle
- His dad got shot and nobody cared because he was the one who shot him
- Ben performs freestyle rap that gets massive crowd approval and Nick Cannon joke from Tony
Set: Jokes about awkward sexual situations including receiving Viagra pills, awkward prostate exams with an optometrist, and dark humor about his mother being choked by his father.
Interview: Austin discussed moving to Austin two months ago from Peoria Illinois, working as a door guy at Maggie Mae's, living with roommates in Pflugerville, and his frequent sexual encounters with drunk women at work.
- Getting boner pills from friend compared to awkward condom conversation with father
- Mother choked by father framed as blue collar family trait
- Callback to Hans Kim's earlier joke about Green Belt being place to hang himself
Set: Marriage humor including wife wanting to cheat, choking jokes, lack of knowledge about parenting, and commentary on not conforming to group stereotypes regardless of identity.
Interview: Todd discussed his new podcast 'Sweet Potato Pod' about food, his weight loss goals, full-time comedy career, shows in Las Vegas and Boston, and his wife's various activities.
- Wife learning to be on top and wanting to try other things in bed
- People don't have to conform to all rules of their identity group
- Golden ticket winner making return appearance with new material
Set: Comedy about the name Ernest being outdated, comparison to more modern Black names, and naming his son Ernest Junior despite the negative connotations of the name.
Interview: Ernest discussed being in the Army for 20+ years, serving as a Blackhawk crew chief in Afghanistan twice, his marriage and newborn baby, and his job with the state of Texas.
- Ernest is name for divorced men with gray beards who give bad advice
- Modern Black names don't get hired, so naming son Ernest ensures employment
- Army veteran reveals military service and helicopter crew chief background
Set: Set presented as humor about being gay in the Marines under Don't Ask Don't Tell, group shower sexual touching, and sergeant coercion, but Justin clarified afterward that he's not actually gay.
Interview: Justin revealed he was a Marine scout sniper deployed to Iraq twice, got blown up on first patrol, is a black belt in jiu jitsu, appeared on Naked and Afraid, and works in tech.
- Don't Ask Don't Tell made him gay; came out of Marines as confident gay man
- Marines touch penises in shower, tried to report to sergeant, got inappropriate response
- Tony catches Justin in stolen valor lie about being gay
- Justin appears on screen from Naked and Afraid episode showing his physique
Set: Experimental material read from W9 tax form about Kansas City barbecue, Chicago, Patrick Mahomes, Taylor Swift, and admitting to being broke and going to jail about taxes.
Interview: Cam discussed Chicago shows and the famous Bean sculpture (Cloud Gate), his reaction to not knowing about the Bean despite travel experience, Chicago street incidents with aggressive people.
- Kansas City has good barbecue and Patrick Mahomes is very Black
- Paying taxes is unfamiliar scary concept that will result in jail
- Tony and entire panel discover Cam doesn't know about Chicago's famous Cloud Gate Bean sculpture despite frequent travel
Set: Jokes about court-ordered fatherhood, deadnaming confusion where white man called him the n-word and he thought it was his old name, and claiming a Black friend so he can tell the joke.
Interview: Brian is from Atlanta, first time on the show, been doing stand-up for six months, has lived in Virginia, Maryland, and California, and performs in various Chicago venues.
- Court ordered to be a father, treated as a joke at beginning
- White guy called him n-word, he thought it was deadnaming his old name
- Tony and panel react to never hearing of Chicago Bean sculpture despite extensive travel
- First-ever Trivia game on Kill Tony initiated, including black trivia section
Set: Music criticism about every genre being retards making noise, extending critique to hip hop, death metal, and stand-up comedy as one retard trying to be clever, plus random shout-out to stripper named Diversity.
Interview: Brian discussed recently switching from car dealership to alcohol delivery driver, previously worked in journalism and was in a Hate Breed cover band, buys and sells baseball cards on eBay, and has been sober two months after previously struggling with alcohol.
- All hip hop is three retards spouting gibberish over awkward drumbeat
- All genres equally terrible: hip hop retards, metal retards, comedy one retard
- Brian performs heavy metal vocals with band for crowd, heavy emotional display
Set: Jokes about expensive cowboy outfits looking gay, reading food blogs written by porn stars, British ladybird naming etymology versus American practicality, and off-balance comedic presentation.
Interview: Martin discussed touring with Aaron Butler, getting early boarding on flights as a bigger person, not enjoying emergency exit row seats due to anxiety, and a driving incident where he thought someone was playing a Jedi mind trick.
- Cowboy outfit is expensive and makes you look gay despite trying to look tough
- British call ladybugs ladybirds because red symbolizes nobility; Americans know birds
- Martin Phillips golden ticket winner returns with strong material and physical comedy
Set: Self-identified autistic, gay, bisexual comedian discusses being vaccinated, vaccine injury theories, Israel-Gaza conflict, friends aging into barbecuing or grooming, and meat preparation humor.
Interview: Javier recently moved from Puerto Rico to Austin with friends, works in tech, does voiceover work, aspires to be announcer for Kill Tony and meet Bruce Buffer, has deep voice, father is mechanical engineer.
- Autistic and gay which is probably vaccine injury, supports genocide and girl math
- Friends turning 27 either barbecuing or grooming, similar meat preparation process
- Javier reveals story about farting in woman's face during oral sex and she continued
- Entire band and audience want Javier to sing Chocolate Rain, he doesn't know song