Kill Tony #691 — James McCann, Ari Matti
Guests: James McCann · Ari Matti
Lineup
Set: Political commentary on lawn signs, polarization, and Halloween costumes disguised as political messaging. Mixed absurdist humor about voter choice and personal safety.
Interview: Discussed writing process, recent trip to Estonia, and fan interactions at immigration. Joined the panel for the remainder of the episode.
- Lawn signs advertise unarmed victims to robbers regardless of political affiliation.
- Claims house displays Trump signs with swastikas to advertise dangerous residents.
- Ari invited to join panel after strong opening set
- Shared Estonian passport story about Kill Tony fans yelling during immigration
Set: Experimental bit where he spells out words syllable-by-syllable in conversation with girlfriend. Started weak but recovered with musical improv closing.
Interview: Discussed 7 years in comedy, move to Austin, McDonald's shift leader job, and passion for rap music. Performed brief rap about divided communities.
- Girlfriend and he communicate by spelling out words letter-by-letter.
- McDonald's food quality and Quarter Pounder availability during E. coli outbreak.
- Performed improvisational rap after being criticized for unconventional style
- Panel repeatedly noted his extremely autistic presentation style
Set: Dark humor about murdering girlfriend for Netflix special, dating app frustrations, and caveman dating. References Gabby Petito case.
Interview: Third appearance. Discussed being born with one testicle, mother's previous panel appearance, current bartending job, and 4-year relationship with Jennifer.
- Plans to murder girlfriend in woods to secure Netflix special deal.
- Questions about pre-dating app human courtship and fire invention.
- Extended riffing on testicle topic sparked by panel and audience
- Tony noted he looks like someone who would murder girlfriend
- Hitler testicle reference from Ari Matti about Australian education
Set: Material about lazy cheating ex-boyfriend, condom arguments, and convincing him disability was contagious. Disability representation in comedy.
Interview: Discussed wheelchair breakdown in Fort Worth, selling out shows in Nashville, past relationships, medical trial pause, and airplane disability seating dynamics.
- Lied about contagious disability to end condom argument with ex.
- Cheating ex showed minimal effort even in infidelity.
- Stranger recognized her from Kill Tony and helped fix wheelchair
- Story about airplane disability seating conflict with obese passengers
Danny Martinello, Ron White
Set: Material about recently released cousin sharing embarrassing childhood stories, pillow-humping incident with Usher music, and cousin's inappropriate behavior toward women.
Interview: Discussed cousin's prison release for armed robbery, colorism against light-skinned Black men, childhood fight with light-skinned cousin, and family dynamics.
- Cousin reveals humiliating childhood pillow-humping incident to new friends.
- Cousin believed choking women during intimacy was throat massage.
- Panel and Kam joked about going to Estonia together to find women
- Ari Matti and Kam bonded as 'cousins' during interview
Set: Material about anime store with gay porn floors, Tinder profiles with problematic people, goth girls seeking roadkill, and museum requiring advance registration.
Interview: One year in comedy, relocated from Virginia with $20 savings, inherited money from deceased relative. Car enthusiast with Japanese and European expertise. Never had sexual experience.
- Japanese anime store's top floors dedicated to gay pornography.
- Goth girls on Tinder seek men to retrieve roadkill.
- Panel repeatedly bullied Benjamin about extremely thick glasses and thin arms
- Revealed grandfather worked as experimental test pilot at Area 51
- Removed glasses revealing attractiveness to audience surprise
Set: Dark humor about grandfather's dementia enabling denial of molestation, relatable joke that unsettled audience member, and brother sharing embarrassing stories.
Interview: Two and a half years comedy in Seattle and San Diego. Moving to Dublin as Irish citizen. Software engineer at bank. Loves hiking and binge drinking.
- Grandfather's dementia means he forgot the molestation.
- Revealed being placed on Canadian terrorist watch list at age 9
- Vin Diesel reference when discussing name sharing with actor
Set: Roast of Tony Hinchcliffe for Puerto Rico jokes, defended Puerto Rican heritage, claimed Tony's blood is HIV positive, threw paper towels referencing hurricane response.
Interview: One of first Kill Tony regulars. Addressed Tony's controversial Puerto Rico speech at Trump rally. Joined panel for remainder of episode.
- Tony's blood is HIV positive unlike her Puerto Rican heritage.
- Only dirty parts of Puerto Rico taken over by white billionaires.
- Threw paper towels into crowd referencing hurricane Maria response meme
- Kim invited to join panel after strong roast of Tony
Set: Material about mixed race identity, being only Black person at white events, 23andMe results, using n-word in syllables, and military lessons including LSD drug test tip.
Interview: Three years comedy in Illinois and Chicago suburbs. Purple belt jiu-jitsu. YMCA after-school program employee. Recently dating woman from Bumble. Marine Corps veteran.
- Mixed race man was only Black person at cookout, was confused.
- Can use n-word only after doing 23andMe because he is 25% Nigerian.
- Panel debated whether Matthew was 'big' or 'little' physically
Set: Opened with dark joke about deceased girlfriend with fentanyl, praised Tony's Trump rally set, joked about Trump supporters being gay, and rapped 'Ice Cream' song.
Interview: Previous Kill Tony regular, known as Canadian rapper Lil God. Performed ice cream-themed rap. Discussed music career and viral TikTok success.
- Girlfriend died from fentanyl while performing sexual act.
- Performed ice cream-themed rap with audience booing
- Mentioned ice cream rap went viral on TikTok
Set: Topical material about Tony's Trump rally jokes, assassination attempt on Trump, and random Pope joke about Red Sea. Strong material addressing Tony directly.
Interview: All-time record holder for Kill Tony appearances. Discussed recent Tetris and Donkey Kong Country gaming, Portland comedy trip with poor conditions, and upcoming Cincinnati gig.
- Trump wishing he'd been shot in other ear after Tony's jokes.
- Random Pope joke about parting the Red Sea.
- Tony acknowledged William's other ear joke as best version heard
- William mentioned playing Tetris while thinking about Tony