KILL TONY Wiki

Kill Tony #527 — Jamar Neighbors, Brian Moses

📅 October 4, 2021 📍 Austin, TX Vulcan Gas Company 🎤 9 comedians ⭐ 2 regulars

Guests: Jamar Neighbors · Brian Moses

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Lineup

1

Hans Kim

Regular

Set: Han jokes about living in a van to pursue comedy, difficulty dating after Gabby Petito, jerking off in vans with hazard lights flashing, and sexual tension.

Interview: Hans discusses his new girlfriend Paige, a homeless woman who came on stage; they sleep in the van together in a back-to-back spooning position; Hans explains his recent sexual conquests and strippers at the Yellow Rose.

Bits:
  • Living in van makes dating hard after Gabby Petito murder case
  • Jerking off in van causes hazard lights to flash, signaling activity
  • Roof leaking in van similar to phone drying in rice bowl
Moments:
  • Hans's girlfriend Paige comes on stage with broken finger; various riffs about her being homeless and dating Hans
  • Discussion of Hans's recent sexual encounters; panel members riff about his homeless girlfriend
2

Monford Davis

Set: Monford jokes about chasing dreams but potentially ending up with children from big booty Latinas, racial preferences in sexual partners, and seasoning differences between races.

Interview: Monford reveals preference for Black girls and big booty Latinas found at 7-Elevens; Tony and Jamar facetime Jamar's auntie Shannon at an NFL game; Monford makes crude sexual comments; later shows off his dancing skills.

Bits:
  • Moved to Austin to pursue comedy but keeps impregnating big booty Latinas
  • Black girls taste better than white girls due to seasoning
Moments:
  • Jamar facetimes his auntie Shannon at an NFL game; Monford makes crude sexual comments about her
  • Monford reveals he can dance and shows off edm-style dancing on stage
3

Jesse Burr

Set: Jesse jokes about missing Dick Cheney's dangerous approach to politics, comparing modern politicians unfavorably to past ones in a dark hunting metaphor.

Interview: Jesse is a first-time comic from Santa Barbara wearing fake blonde hair and a hat; claims her grandfather was Quick Draw McGraw; worked as stockbroker, caused 2008 financial crisis, drives white van, has white van Prius, sings country.

Bits:
  • Dick Cheney safer than modern politicians, hunted but didn't accidentally shoot
Moments:
  • Jesse performs a country song on stage; Tony and panel are surprised by her vocal ability
  • Jesse makes bizarre claims about being a stockbroker, causing 2008 crisis, suing over California fires; appears mentally unstable or performing elaborate character
  • Jesse discusses being date raped multiple times; Tony questions accuracy of her stories
4

Ben Horn

Set: Ben jokes about beating his roommate while blackout drunk (describing it as CPS taking her), looking like someone who would do bad things to women, and criticizing six-week abortion restrictions.

Interview: Ben is returning regular who works at HEB as personal shopper; has a distinctive pink mustache he's been growing since lockdown; lives downtown in rough area near gas station with constant crime and dice games.

Bits:
  • Blackout drunk, beat roommate; told people CPS took her instead
  • Six weeks not enough time for women to know they had sex
Moments:
  • Ben's distinctive pink mustache becomes focal point of jokes from panel; described as resembling Steve Bannon, Civil War reenactor
  • Ben discusses living downtown in rough area with constant crime, dice games in chip aisles, casual theft at nearby gas station
5

Sam Hunter

Set: Sam jokes about chub rub when running, penis getting stuck between thighs causing accidental masturbation, inability to run due to always coming, and high school football coach.

Interview: Sam recently moved from Connecticut to Austin; unemployed former car dealership assistant manager; Irish drinker interested in live music and getting intoxicated; met drinkers on tour who listen to Kill Tony; demonstrates impressive hip-shaking dance moves.

Bits:
  • Thigh rub during running traps penis, causes bluetooth masturbation walking
  • Running makes him orgasm, ruining fitness; coach thought he was lazy
Moments:
  • Sam demonstrates impressive hip-shaking dance moves on stage while music plays; compared to Hannah Gaspi; panel impressed by rhythm and skill
  • Tony compares Sam's appearance to kid from Up, suggests he was locked in walk-in cooler since fifth grade
  • Tony and panel set up weight loss challenge for Sam and Trey Pack to return next week
7

Jordan Macdonald

Set: Jordan jokes about not dating white women because he talks too much shit, compares Drake to the McRib (periodic release), relates to Drake through absent fathers and present mothers.

Interview: Jordan performs on show second time; last time mentioned living on Black Angus cattle ranch; car broken into and joke book stolen; has white mother, raised in racist town Sherman Texas, called n-word in third grade; identifies as light-skinned Black.

Bits:
  • Doesn't date white women; can't talk about other women in front of them
  • Drake like McRib: periodic releases get hype, then quality questioned
Moments:
  • Tony brings up audience member Jared to dance with Jordan for comparison; both are large men; extended crowd work about their appearance
  • Discussion of Jordan being called n-word in third grade lunch room; panel compares Jordan's appearance to Eric Andre and other celebrities
9

William Montgomery

Regular

Set: William performs new minute about grandfather emailing from heaven with good wifi, blaming Facebook for Trump election (agrees with comparison to heavy metal/school shootings), Barbie from Arkansas marrying Ken, Austin police not responding to petty crimes, stealing jokes.

Interview: William recently got too high before set; discusses raisin bread addiction (3.5 loaves per week) and making personal supreme pizzas; claims to see shadow people/ghosts in apartment and shower; convinced apartment is haunted by shadow entities.

Bits:
  • Grandfather emails from heaven with excellent wifi connection
  • Blaming Facebook for Trump is like blaming metal for school shootings
  • Barbie from Arkansas married Ken because he's kinfolk
Moments:
  • William admits he got too high before performing; self-critiques his set quality and jokes
  • Extensive discussion of William's belief in shadow people ghosts in apartment; panel questions if he's describing people literally or metaphorically; potential racial misunderstanding of 'shadow people' term
  • Panel jokes about William looking like rapist or racist; William uncomfortable with line of questioning