Kill Tony #771 — Brad Williams, Timmy No Brakes
Guests: Brad Williams · Timmy No Brakes
Lineup
Set: Observational jokes about girls named America, homelessness terminology, the Redskins name change, and the NAACP acronym leading to 'nappy.'
Interview: Pat discusses his sobriety, his appearance, and his status as a newly promoted regular on the show.
- Girls named America are always Mexican; trying to fool with a name change
- Homelessness prevention via fentanyl; changing terminology from homeless to toilet protesters
- NAACP should be NAAAP or 'nappy' for easier pronunciation
- First-ever comedian promoted from golden ticket winner to regular status
- Brad and Timmy coaching Pat on joke delivery and structure
Set: Hypothetical about a world where people must take a test to prove they're not gay; set culminates in being sentenced to two years in an all-gay facility.
Interview: Darion is a world champion IBJJF black belt in Brazilian jiu-jitsu, from Kansas, works in corporate insurance, cannot swim despite being a world champion judoka.
- Gay test trial: accused publicly, taken to gay court, sentenced to gay facility
- Timmy immediately calls him gay after the set about gay people
- Reveals he's a multiple-time IBJJF world champion in jiu-jitsu, legitimizing competitive credentials
- Reveals inability to swim despite athletic prowess; performed comedy set as first ever performance
Set: Jokes about being bald and hat fishing women, looking like an ice cream target with hat vs ice employee without it.
Interview: DJ Cayotic is a DJ for 13 years in Austin, started comedy 3 years ago, helped manage The Green Room venue.
- Hat fishing women; bald reveal after clothes come off catches them off guard
- With hat looks like ice cream target; without hat looks like ice employee
- Ran out of material mid-way through set; only had 45 seconds of material prepared
Set: Jokes about looking like Alex Jones as he ages, Clinton's grin during testimony, hypothetical Trump-Clinton affair, and Trump bragging about oral sex.
Interview: Chris sells security systems in Dayton, Ohio (high copper theft area), has 11-year-old son, been doing stand-up 2.5 years, doesn't eat ass.
- Looking like sad divorced dad Alex Jones as he ages
- Clinton's shit-eating grin during Congressional testimony about Epstein photos
- Trump would brag about sucking Clinton's dick better than anyone
- Panel heavily criticizes his lack of enthusiasm for eating pussy
Set: Jokes about moving from Montreal (gay Alaska), jiu-jitsu ears, Dana White privilege, jiu-jitsu being homoerotic, and having been a UFC fighter.
Interview: Eric is a former UFC fighter (2-5 record, 8 fights), now coaches jiu-jitsu, black belt for years, came from NYC, lived in Canada 10 years, tried out for WWE.
- Canada is gay Alaska per president; goofy ears from jiu-jitsu give Dana White privilege
- Jiu-jitsu is homoerotic but pretty gay after doing it half my life as black belt
- Reveals 2-5 UFC record and poor memory of fight count
- Timmy books him for secret show at Sanjak open mic
Set: Jokes about bad flirting (girl compliments shoes, he says he bought them), girlfriend asking hypothetical questions about memory loss, punchline about begging for anal.
Interview: Lewis moved from Bay Area to Austin March last year, works AV at Moody Center arena, has 80% hearing in right ear and 60% in left from skydiving accident.
- Girl asks about shoes, he says 'Mhmm, I bought them' - bad flirting response
- Girlfriend asks hypothetical about memory loss; punchline about begging for anal sex
- Panel praises his strong punchline delivery and structure
- Reveals hearing loss from skydiving while congested from 18,000 feet
Set: Jokes about being a shopaholic, drug use on Silk Road dark net, buying cocaine from Bolivia via Bitcoin, snorting four Lamborghini dealerships worth, Mt. Gox Bitcoin saga.
Interview: Michael worked for Mt. Gox exchange, got subpoenaed by Southern District of New York, has three kids (two with different mothers, third with Japanese partner in Tokyo), produces English comedy shows in Japan.
- Snorted so much cocaine via Bitcoin he snorted four Lamborghini dealerships
- Mt. Gox lost 600,000 Bitcoin (billions); he was press release guy explaining why people couldn't access money
- Got subpoenaed day his first child was born
Daisuke Muramato, Michael Kay
Set: Jokes about cops and rap music, roommate complimenting clean car, sexual acts in family restroom, playing tag with non-binary people, trans lad bedtime confusion, hyper-Israelism art form.
Interview: Remington is former military with service injury (severed tendons collarbone to shoulder blade), on ankle monitor for two DWIs in 14 days, carries brass knuckles for homeless defense.
- Police brutality bad but where would rap be without cops harassing Black people
- Tried polyamory; girlfriend worried about getting caught in bathroom; said don't worry I'll say you're my sister
- To tell time I pull out cock; someone says 'your cock's out' and tells me the time
- Reveals ankle monitor from two DWIs in 14 days; detailed story of both incidents
- Panel notes his joke writing and structure quality
Angel Diaz
Set: Jokes about anime being gay with hard-dicked artists, friend suggesting ketamine and anime, women's anatomy in anime, describes sexual technique with explicit detail.
Interview: Angel from New York, hit by Asian driver (kamikaze reference), stays with OnlyFans girl without sleeping with her, concerns about penis photos circulating, has unprotected sex frequently.
- Anime is gay; people with hard dicks draw big-titted women in school settings
- Golden ticket winner cashing in second time on show; first appearance knowing he'd be on
- Detailed explicit sexual technique description; crowd engaged and encouraging
- Hit by Asian driver (kamikaze reference); didn't pursue because driver was Asian
Ty Funny
Set: Jokes about lesbian baby shower, cousin's stud girlfriend, DUI and getting fired for stealing coworker's hot pocket from microwave, helping search for item he stole.
Interview: Ty trained with Michael Phelps in Baltimore, 10 years stand-up experience, traveled Baltimore/Atlanta/New York, just moved to Austin, drives food delivery trucks.
- Cousin's stud girlfriend got pregnant; Ty said 'got a nigga pregnant' at first sight
- Fired for stealing coworker's hot pocket; came out with just the sleeve, helped them look for it
- To make truck honk, I call out then cover facial hair so I look like kid
- Reveals training with Michael Phelps in Baltimore despite looking unfit
- Dated trans person; exchanged dick pics in group chat
Bobby Ludlum
Set: Jokes about sucking dick for stage time in California, polyamory as lonely on Friday, public restroom sex attempt, trans lad bedtime, hyper-Israelism art form, using cock to tell time.
Interview: Bobby from Pomona, California, adopted accent while working at Costco, been doing stand-up almost 5 years, true fan of Kill Tony show.
- In California you have to suck dick for stage time; thought it was a requirement
- Polyamory is Latin for lonely on Friday night; girlfriend worried about getting caught in restroom
- When I want to know time I pull out cock; someone says hey your cock's out it's 3pm