Kill Tony #759 — Joe List, Steve Rannazzisi
Guests: Joe List · Steve Rannazzisi
Lineup
Set: Rock performs graphic material about his nudist father's large genitalia and explicit childhood memories involving nudity and his mother's breasts. Comedy focuses on family trauma and uncomfortable visual memories.
Interview: Tony discovers Rock is 42, just started comedy 2 years ago, works in wedding photography/video, and has four kids (two step-kids ages 26 and 20, two biological kids ages 12 and 11). Extended discussion about his name similarity to Brock Turner the rapist.
- Father's large penis had Netflix account and was only thing father was proud of.
- Mother's breast grazing forehead waking him up for school.
- Revelation that his name is not his given name—he was named Rock Turner by parents after Rock Hudson, then changed to Brad when Hudson was found to be gay.
- Tony and panel extensively riff on Brock Turner the rapist having same name as Rock Turner.
Set: Mark performs edgy material about Oscar season, GPS avoiding MLK Boulevard, racism improving with age, his grandfather's cat named the N-word, and racial ignorance. Dark observational comedy.
Interview: Mark is 59, doing his sixth open mic, previously did improv at Second City and Improv Olympic in Chicago. Recently married 22 years after divorcing and remarrying same person after 11-year split. Works in consulting giving CEOs smart things to say. Had body/fender painting background. Recently nearly died from bilateral pulmonary embolism on Super Bowl Sunday.
- Programmed GPS to avoid all Martin Luther King Boulevards.
- Grandfather's cat was named the N-word, racism improving as he ages.
- Can identify hotels blindfolded by the lotion scent in bathrooms.
- Tony recognizes Mark's maturity and life experience as promising for interview material, correctly predicting good stories.
- Revelation of marriage strategy: divorcing and remarrying the same person after 11 years apart led to reconciliation.
- Mark casually mentions nearly dying from bilateral pulmonary embolism on Super Bowl Sunday, Steve Rannazzisi claims responsibility for bad halftime show.
Set: Saul performs observational comedy about brownie points, pilot shortages, Twenty One Pilots joke, naming storms after people, and diseases named after people.
Interview: Saul drives for Uber/Uber Eats, has road rage tendencies, cites Norm Macdonald as biggest inspiration. After a poor attempt at a Norm impression where he jokes about being able to drive himself (implying Norm couldn't), Tony ends the interview early.
- Brownie points now mean higher chance of anal sex.
- Twenty One Pilots could help with pilot shortage.
- We name storms and diseases after people like ex-partners.
- Saul attempts Norm Macdonald impression, jokes he's at least able to drive himself, implying Norm couldn't.
- Tony cuts interview short after discovering Saul keeps answering 'not enough' to how long he's been doing stand-up and open mics.
Set: Ty performs about his dating life after a scooter accident, including a girlfriend who wanted him to talk more during sex (he called his dad), another girlfriend at church who he thought was dead based on staring, and racist jokes about pennies for Asian girlfriend's eyes.
Interview: Ty was hit by lime scooter during previous appearance, then two days later hit by street/concrete in worse accident. Recently (6 months post-accident) broke arm in multiple places, tore patellar tendon completely. Spent 24 hours in hospital in hallway with sign saying keep area clear. Describes incompetent EMS, missing IV bags, improper gown, inappropriate nurse named Papi Chulo. Still recovering with 6 more months to go.
- Girlfriend wanted him to talk during sex, he called his dad instead.
- Church hookup where girl stared weirdly, he covered her eyes with pennies (racist joke about being Asian).
- Ty reveals he was hit by scooter AGAIN after previous Kill Tony appearance where he joked about being fine. This time resulted in serious injuries requiring emergency surgery.
- Extended hospital horror story with multiple absurd details: hallway placement, missing IV, Joe's Crab Shack bib as gown, nurse named Papi Chulo offering inappropriate sponge baths, anesthesia safe word joke.
- Ty mentions he's autistic, questions why he's not considered disabled enough for golden ticket.
Angel
Set: Angel performs about being called autistic by strangers, Latino pride, childhood beliefs about dog sizes, stepfather dropping N-word at Walmart, and bad dating experiences.
Interview: Angel is 26, Chicano (half Mexican/half American), doing stand-up for 3.5 years, increased frequency recently to 5-10 mics weekly and 8 in one night. Works assembling emergency lights for police vehicles. Has 8 sisters and one newborn brother (9 siblings total), second oldest. Father continues having children with current partner who has 6 kids. Angel is pansexual, reveals never been with a woman despite being with 40+ men. Describes ideal first date at coffee shop, rock climbing, sunset hammock by lake. Demonstrates virginity with women through graphic simulation of cunnilingus (tongue work, 15 minutes). First kiss given by female audience member.
- 90% of people call him autistic, other 10% don't talk to him.
- Grew up thinking all dogs died of parvo before reaching adulthood.
- Stepfather drops N-word at Walmart casually, jokes about needing wetbacks at Home Depot.
- Angel reveals pansexual identity and 40+ male sexual partners but zero female partners. Wants relationship with woman but has only been with men.
- Tony brings female audience member on stage for Angel's first kiss with a woman. Angel confirms kiss worked and he's not gay despite 40 male partners.
- D. Madness (band member) repeatedly leaves/returns during Angel's explicit discussion of pansexuality and sexual preferences. Eventually needs earphones to avoid content.
- Angel demonstrates cunnilingus technique on stage using hand/mouth motions, accidentally spits on audience member in front row, blows raspberries on hand.
- Angel mentions being tuba player for 10 years, gives strength to tongue work.
Set: Luke performs about Wisconsin cheese factory, jokes about keeping workers hard, adulting stress, checking items before leaving (ending with micro penis joke), and failed movie theater experience watching Anora.
Interview: Luke is 26, doing stand-up 6-7 months, frequents Kick Butt Coffee in Austin. Works at spa in hotel resort serving food by pool and picking up towels (6 months). Previously in South Carolina after college graduation, sold windows and worked in restaurant. Has on-and-off girlfriend he's still with, admits to being controlling, builds resentment rather than communicating. Also brought written poem about losing virginity through increasingly absurd animal encounters at a zoo.
- Worked at cheese factory ensuring Swiss cheese had holes in it.
- Phone, wallet, keys, micro penis check before leaving house.
- Watched Anora in theater, first 20 minutes all sex, zipped up and left.
- Luke brings written poem entitled 'Sleepless Nights' that's double-sided, extends far beyond normal time limits with absurd storyline of zoo animal encounters.
- Poem describes increasingly graphic and absurd animal sexual encounters (penguins, lions, tigers, bears, flamingos, ducks, ostrich, tortoise, monkeys, hippopotamus).
- Poem climaxes with regret about hippo's fart and hints at part two, goes significantly over time.
Set: Casey performs about showering alone with hip-hop, struggle with censoring self during Wu-Tang, Kanye making him uncomfortable, Puff Daddy heavy breathing, irony of becoming racist and gay from listening to hip-hop.
Interview: Casey is army veteran (82nd Airborne paratroooper from Fort Bragg), 25-26 jumps before getting kicked out for cocaine use. From Florida, still uses cocaine couple times a month recreationally. Moved to Austin 3 weeks ago, recently hired as manager at non-alcoholic bar (Tulum Botanicals) serving kava/kratom. Got cocaine bump from guy at 456 bar in East Austin. Parents both deceased: mother from drinking/drug use, father survived Vietnam and cocaine cowboys era before having stroke.
- Showering with hip-hop, can't censor self during Wu-Tang Clan.
- Kanye made him uncomfortable in shower, skipped song, then Puff Daddy heavy breathing.
- Hip-hop makes it easy to become both racist and gay unintentionally.
- Casey admits to active cocaine use multiple times per month, got a bump in Austin after moving 3 weeks ago.
- Reveals both parents deceased: mother from substance abuse, father stroke survivor of Vietnam and drug era.
Set: Symply Courtney performs about Uber driving as Black man named Courtney, passenger disbelief about car ownership, Black History Month greeting, childhood belief about dog sizes, taking tolerance break from weed, forgetting passengers during weed use, potential roommate comment.
Interview: Symply is from Austin, doing comedy 13 years but rarely signs up for Kill Tony (Mondays conflict with teaching daughter to drive). Has 17-year-old daughter and 15-year-old son who's 6'4 and taller than him. Daughter dating someone darker than him, Symply unbothered. Not married to their mother but amicable, stays there to drive kids to school Tuesday/Thursday. Makes money purely from comedy: open mics, running shows, performing. Listens to Stevie Wonder, Michael Jackson's Off the Wall, Prince. Works Wednesdays at radio station 88.7.
- Hard to drive Uber as Black dude named Courtney, passenger questioned car ownership.
- Taking weed tolerance break, forgets he's driving Uber with terrified passenger.
- Gets high at son's basketball games, cheers for wrong team, supports good plays regardless.
- Symply reveals he's been doing comedy 13 years in Austin but just made Kill Tony debut after skipping Mondays to teach daughter to drive.
- Discussion of daughter's birthday (September 19th, year withheld) and current dating situation. Symply unbothered about boyfriend being darker than him.
- Symply gets 'blackest' joke book of night, awarded for impressive set and real-life stories.
Set: Dedrick performs about family size importance, growing up in two-bedroom townhouse with six people on one king mattress (no boogeyman), surviving big booty TV remote wars in '90s, getting punched by siblings over SpongeBob, taking batteries out remote as petty move, metaphor comparing big booty TVs to women.
Interview: Dedrick escaped Boston blizzard to come to Austin. Wears do-rag celebrating Black History Month. Discuss hockey (American team women's/men's won gold), Boston being cold with rednecks, feeling spy versus spy vibe. Recently bought Big Buck Hunter arcade game for $500 from Kohl's. Plays on mushrooms, holds gun sideways like John Wick. Lives his dream traveling, meeting people.
- Grew up six people on one king mattress, wouldn't allow boogeyman entry.
- Big booty TV remote wars, hitting siblings over SpongeBob control.
- Big booty TVs doubled as furniture, doubled as things you could slap.
- Dedrick performs 96 seconds with new minute every week, more prepared than other performers.
- Discussion of auntie vs aunty, regional dialect difference between Boston/Midwest.
- Dedrick reveals he got Big Buck Hunter arcade game and plays on mushrooms, Tony jokes about animal hunting.