Kill Tony #777 — Myles Johnson, Fuzzy Khilji
Guests: Myles Johnson · Fuzzy Khilji
Lineup
Brian Randell
PanelSet: Preacher character about leaving the Mormon church, getting brain damage, finding solar panel saleswoman on Myspace, being baptized for sexual favors, and getting "holy ghosted."
Interview: Discussed being Mormon, Mountain Dew consumption, Taco Bell $7 box habits including bean-only tacos with creamy jalapeno sauce, and recent dating situation with woman who ghosted him for another comedian.
- Left Mormon church because Blade couldn't go to heaven.
- Got baptized after woman offered blow job; later got "holy ghosted" on Myspace.
- Tony roasts Drew's body shape saying he looks like a salmon.
- Fuzzy reveals girl who ghosted him left him for Drew, Tony calls him out for mentioning Drew.
Set: Conservative Oklahoma ex-felon discussing pro-life stance, legal gun purchases, and comparing comedy and narcotics anonymous. Mentions 13-year-old son.
Interview: Discussed multiple assault and battery charges, 14-hour masturbation session in friend's attic on Halloween while on meth/benzos, athlete's penis, and how honesty drives parenting approach.
- Pro-life except if pregnant with his own kid.
- Buying guns like ordering at coffee shop with ex-girlfriend.
- Extended interview about 14-hour masturbation marathon in attic while on meth/benzos; developed athlete's penis symptoms.
- Tony roasts Robert's appearance and body shape after learning about Taco Bell diet.
Set: Three-year sober comedian with drug addiction history (spoon tattoo), discusses recovering from cocaine and alcohol addiction, being sober while bartending.
Interview: Discussed sobriety milestone of three years, bartending while sober, giving up dating, playing online poker poorly, and not kissing anyone in three years. Audience member gives him a kiss.
- Spoon tattoo doesn't mean he loves soup.
- People comfortable asking if addicts did gay things for drugs.
- Audience member (wearing USA jersey) comes on stage to kiss Eddie who hasn't kissed anyone in 3 years.
Set: UTEP digital media student from El Paso discussing why minors mascot doesn't make sense, gold-digging girls, deporting football coaches instead of cousins.
Interview: Discussed using 'way' as filler word, three jobs, getting paid by Javi for comedy, medical tourism to Juarez Mexico, half-Japanese heritage, girlfriend at Las Cruces, bedroom tricks with Love Island playing.
- UTEP minors get molested every weekend like football team.
- Girls at UTEP only want him for FAFSA money.
- Fumio does Mexican whistle; Tony compliments it.
Teresa
Set: Offensive jokes about illegal immigrants, slavery, wet pussy references, period blood, Asian heritage (half Chinese, half white), got fired from education job after previous Kill Tony appearance.
Interview: Discussed being fired from education job after Kill Tony appearance, now landscaping and cleaning houses, boyfriend of 1.5 months who doesn't love her, getting out of psych ward after shroom trip, naked cartwheels, wanted to be a rapper.
- Would deport running back instead of Mexican cousins.
- Teresa uses N-word in set; Tony references her dropping bomb; discusses using it while singing rap.
- Discussed time in psych ward after shroom overdose, ran naked doing cartwheels.
Set: 59-year-old comedian making jokes about getting kicked out of casino, practical joking at gun shops, buying one bullet and charging it.
Interview: Second appearance in row; discussed late friend John Mulrooney who died on ice, 89-year-old mother with younger boyfriend, vasectomy at 32 to avoid pregnancy, dating heavy model, afraid of heights during sex.
- Practical joke at gun shop asking for one bullet.
- Dating heavy model was too big; couldn't have sex, afraid of heights.
- Tony praises Joel for using interview time to be funny and do callbacks; calls it putting on a clinic.
- Second bucket pull in a row, rare occurrence; Tony notes comedy gods looking down on him.
Set: Material about getting arrested in Japan as AI video, returning to US, getting jail time, becoming stronger person, soft country, automatic windshield wipers, driving in rain without AC.
Interview: Discussed jail time in Japan, making friends including sensei, learning samurai blindness, catching flies with chopsticks, watching VHS movies in his head during 23-day jail stay, thought of 500 mental versions of himself.
- Automatic windshield wipers make country too soft and weak.
- Manual windows in rain on interstate while going 75 mph.
- Dedrick catches fly on stage with chopsticks while discussing samurai training from Japan.
Ty Wynn
Set: 11-year comedian discussing drinking PBR, eating booty for insufficient funds, brother is parkour artist, sister is gastroenterologist who can smell farts.
Interview: Discussed working on 90s East Coast rap album about stand-up, performs rap about food/sex trade-offs, mentions wanting headlining spots, hosts Tuesday show at Green Room.
- Drinks PBR same reason don't eat booty for taste: insufficient funds.
- Brother is parkour artist throwing parents' dreams out window.
- Ty performs rap with band backing; mentions food/sex trade-offs.
- Ty busts panels' balls for being quiet; Miles checks in jokingly; mentions wanting Kanye on panel.
Set: 68-year-old starting stand-up at 57, discussing 54 years of sexual experience, 69-year-old girlfriend, three ex-wives, divorce costs, cost per sexual encounter math.
Interview: Discussed motivational speaking on suicide awareness (two brothers committed suicide, third attempted), book 'Ballad of Uncle G', dating schizophrenic woman with two personalities, all three ex-wives' failures, treating waitresses as character indicator.
- 69-year-old girlfriend is saber-tooth tiger not cougar.
- Spent 1 million on three divorces; divorce expensive because worth it.
- Cost exactly $300 per sexual encounter over 40-year marriage; now renting not buying.
- Golden ticket awarded after extended interview; longest interview of episode.
- Uncle G gives relationship advice about treating waitresses; tells story of first wife.
Set: About Airbnb cost-sharing on Cash App with fake joke explanations ($186 for pussy/sex/gay acts), girlfriend interprets coded messages as prostitution.
Interview: Third year of comedy, previous appearance with Tom Segura and Cheryl Underwood, drank with pro wrestlers including Sammy Guevara from AEW, wore luchador mask during sex.
- Airbnb cost-sharing looks like prostitution charges on Cash App.
- Tony gives advice about using fake identity for comedy material to stand out.
Karen Jones
Set: About family peeing in shower, 11-year-old son upset about family bathroom habits, jokes about father masturbating, 74-year-old boyfriend, sickening old people sex, walking in on grandparents.
Interview: January 6 Capitol riot participant who was 'invited' inside by police, owns property in Santa Ines California near Michael Jackson/Reagan ranches, ex-smoker since thirties, previous education career interrupted by Kill Tony appearance, working on comedy club.
- Family all pees in shower; 11-year-old didn't know it was allowed.
- Son is upset about father's shower masturbation; became strip club manager.
- Extended discussion about January 6 participation, insistence on police invitation, upcoming video evidence of being hit by police.
- Tony references looking like Exorcist nun character due to appearance.