Heath Cordes
Heath Cordes has performed on Kill Tony 10 times, winning a golden ticket. Every appearance below, with set summaries and timestamps.
Appearances
Set about moving to Texas and living with his grandmother who baked sweets; he ate them too fast and she got mad. Increasingly incoherent jokes about his grandmother being a homophobe with a penis, ending with him admitting to a threesome at a strip club.
- Grandmother like a pimp feeding crack to her bitch with sweets.
- Grandmother is homophobic but has a penis.
Heath discusses heartbreak, a woman with a mommy kink, his sexual attitudes, and recent trip to Puerto Rico for a private gig where he brought a girlfriend.
- Woman broke his heart; stiff socks and freedom have always been in his corner.
- Met woman with mommy kink; brags about his sexual attitudes and lack of protection.
- References calling 911 when in danger; has become a father.
Heath jokes about his mother accidentally sending him nude photos via cell phone while he was scheduled for surgery in Alabama.
- Mother sends nude photos by mistake via cell phone
Jokes about wet dreams and Ronald McDonald, puberty delays requiring testosterone shots, trying scary things leading to cocaine, masturbation reference.
- Bad dream about Ronald McDonald being chased caused cum in underwear
- Puberty lied about height, voice, muscles but delivered acne and public erections
- Tried something scary at open mic and now has coke habit
Discusses toxic relationship where he threatened to kill girlfriend's family if she left. Now can't see her due to legal restrictions. Ends with joke about fucking Elaine.
- Threatened to kill girlfriend's family and burn house if she left him
Heath (21-year-old who looks 13) does jokes about ID problems getting into bars, looking young, bringing multiple IDs, and threatening violence if ID doesn't work. Golden ticket winner doing arena debut.
- ID problems; bouncer thinks license made with Crayola
- Will bring passport, birth certificate, knife if ID doesn't work
No set recap for this appearance.
Walking down Sixth Street, Instagram live vaping baby incident, tattoo showing, exposing genitals in alley, hitting someone with car.
- Called vaping baby on Instagram live on Sixth Street
- Exposed penis in alley after showing tattoos to stranger
- Broke someone's legs with car after hitting them on 7th Street
No set recap for this appearance.
No set recap for this appearance.