Kill Tony #761 — Adam Ray, Kim Congdon
Guests: Adam Ray · Kim Congdon
Lineup
Set: Enrique opened with observational humor about Houston culture, immigration anxieties under ICE enforcement, and a relationship story involving rescuing cats to impress his girlfriend. He discussed using his blue heeler dog for small talk and navigating different Houston neighborhoods.
Interview: Tony asked about the show size and Enrique discussed his DACA status, his attempts to camouflage himself, and his experiences in different Houston areas. The interview explored his immigration fears and cultural humor.
- ICE killing white people; can't hide in Lululemon
- Rescued 34 cats to impress girlfriend into animal rescue
- Uses blue heeler dog for small talk with older white guys
- Golden ticket winner performing in front of large hometown crowd
- Discussion of DACA status and immigration fears
Set: Max joked about looking like a kid in any store, being unable to keep girlfriends due to being gluten-free, and the depression of his dietary restrictions. He made a dark joke about toasters and baths.
Interview: Tony and panel discussed Max's youthful appearance, his work in supplements, his experiences in Florida, and his German-Mexican heritage. The interview included banter about his ethnicity and jokes about Nazi Germany.
- Looks like kid in candy store in any store due to youth
- Can't keep girlfriend; gluten-free so can't fight Little Debbie
- Only reason to use toaster is bathing; therapist says need outlet
- Adam Ray stares repeatedly at Max during interview
- Max deflects serious relationship/personal questions with bits
Set: Jake opened with jokes about being sober from cocaine, referenced the low Black population in February, and made explicit jokes about eating Black women. He discussed his experiences with different ethnicities and relationships.
Interview: Tony pressed Jake on specifics of his jokes and asked about his background. Jake eventually disclosed a parking lot gun incident at a Houston comedy show, though he was evasive and Tony had to push hard for details.
- 5 years sober from white cocaine; white stuff tastes like nickels
- Eats Black women; woman said 'reparations' while he performed oral sex
- Spectrum of ethnicity preferences; Asian women preference makes boyfriend gay
- Long, convoluted parking lot gun story at Black comedy show
- Jake claims to be Black but appears to be ginger; identity confusion
- Tony expresses frustration with Jake's evasiveness and story length
Set: Collin performed jokes about ears-to-mouth ratio, fingering, girls faking orgasms, UTIs, and eye contact during sex. He mentioned his parents being in the audience and made a joke about pretending to be cucked by his evil twin during sex.
Interview: Tony asked about his parents' reaction, Colin's hometown (Northwest Houston/Heights), and his work history at Express stores. The interview covered his experiences with Epstein-related company history and recent shooting activities.
- God gave ten fingers so we should be fingering constantly
- Pee during sex not after; girlfriend says no eye contact during sex
- Make eye contact during sex with self in mirror; pretend evil twin
- Performing in front of hometown crowd and his parents
- Express connection to Lex Wexner and Epstein controversy
- Willowbrook location violence and stabbing references
Set: Brandon performed about role-playing Kill Tony in the bedroom with his wife, mimicking different comedians and ethnicities from the show. He joked about his wife pretending to be Tony and criticizing his performance during sex.
Interview: Tony asked about Brandon's wife in the front row, his work as insurance broker, his fitness level, and his Afghanistan service. Discussion covered an IED injury affecting sexual function and finding body parts during EOD operations.
- Role-plays Kill Tony in bedroom; mimics different comedians during sex
- Wife pretends to be Tony, criticizes his inability to hit buttons
- Brandon's wife paid big money and is in front row
- Discussed Afghanistan IED injury and permanent sensory loss in genitals
- EOD team member who always found body parts of casualties
- Emotional veteran appreciation from panel and crowd
Set: Mackenzie performed about being a double minority (gay and autistic), bisexuality being gayer than being gay, stimming during sex, and being unable to focus during Netflix and chill because of movie attention.
Interview: Discussed his 3 years of stand-up, living in Westchase but growing up in Acres Homes, his autism, drug use (cocaine and DMT), his year living as a woman, and his bisexual dating experiences.
- Gay and autistic cancel out because white; bisexual is gayer than gay
- Autism makes him stim during sex; asks about cloud storage during act
- Can't Netflix and chill; wants to watch movie instead of get sucked
- Audience member called out for homophobic reaction to boyfriend mention
- Mackenzie lived as a woman for a year with pink hair and Hot Topic clothing
- Showed his chest when asked if he had double scars
- First local to catch joke book; identified as bisexual, 50/50 preference
- Revealed first dick he sucked was Black; called 'Toothy Jenkins'
Set: Uncle Laser performed high-energy, manic material about Houston Rodeo season, large Black women in jeans throwing their bodies to George Strait, and a sexually explicit encounter in a parking lot with a Louisiana woman where she queefed.
Interview: Discussed Houston Rodeo traditions, the Louisiana woman's accent and his sexual encounter with her, and a long rambling story about losing virginity at age 12 with a 14-year-old girl and a 47-year-old Black man in a trailer.
- Big Black women in jeans at Rodeo throwing ass to George Strait
- Hooked up with Louisiana woman in Ford Focus; she queefed/made fart noise
- Lost virginity at 12 with 14-year-old girl and 47-year-old Black man
- Extended queef discussion with band playing different fart noises
- Long rambling story about age-inappropriate sexual encounter in trailer
- Tony acknowledged Uncle Laser's growth and talent in hometown
- Discussed virginity loss 6 minutes from venue with minors and adult
Set: Kyle joked about his brother's vasectomy and whether he'd get one too, about being from Eastern Kentucky and people thinking he banged his cousin, and about being raised Methodist then Crystal Methodist in his 20s.
Interview: Discussed his background in Eastern Kentucky, his move to Houston for work managing shopping centers, his experience as a substitute teacher, and his experience using crystal meth as a substitute for Adderall.
- Brother got vasectomy; I need to get laid first
- From Kentucky; people think I banged cousin; she was homecoming queen
- Raised Methodist; became Crystal Methodist in 20s (crystal meth reference)
- Discussed crystal meth use as Adderall substitute from neighbors
- Described substitute teaching experiences and student bullying
- Student called him 'Mr. Epstein' while substituting; he didn't fire back
- Tony implied Kyle might be school shooter due to suppressed anger
Set: Nunzio talked about coming from Miami for his birthday, his difficult dating experiences there, and that he's half Italian and half Puerto Rican. The set was poorly received and Tony cut him off early.
Interview: Discussed his work as mortgage broker, his love life being difficult in Miami, his mother working at funeral home and strip clubs, and his parents' divorce. Interview was largely unsuccessful.
- Miami strippers are amazing; got a taste of shippers and hoes
- Half Puerto Rican half Italian; called Mexican or colored in Texas
- Entire set was poorly received; Tony cut him off early
- Called 'illiterate Puerto Rican' by Tony
- Revealed mother works at strip clubs and funeral home
- Grew up in funeral home; parents split between households
Yaqiao Yang
Set: Young performed about forms asking for race, comparing race categories, and contrasting Asian approaches to keeping bloodline pure. Jokes about white functional drug addicts, specifically someone who snorted cocaine for 10 years while working in healthcare.
Interview: Discussed her arrival in America in 2012 from China, shock at white functional drug addicts, attempting to buy a Dodge Challenger, and aborting a mixed-race baby. Discussed her mother's three abortions in China due to preference against girls.
- Race categories on forms everywhere; Asian countries just Asian or intruders
- White people good at being functional drug addicts; knew coke user in healthcare
- Trying to save for Dodge Challenger; blackest thing she's done
- Aborted half-Black baby named Laquina; mother had three abortions in China
- Golden ticket winner from New Year's Eve Netflix show performing in Houston
- Discussed functional drug addiction in white Americans
- Revealed abortion of mixed-race baby; mother's reproductive history
- Discussed Chinese gender preference and modern policy changes
Smiffy
Set: Smiffy joked about being friends with gay people who try to trick you into competitions, about old Black people losing their advisory role and asking 'where the hoes at', and changing times.
Interview: Discussed his one year of stand-up in Savannah after military service in Korea. Covered his truck driving job in Houston, his dog, dating challenges due to pigeon-toed walking, and discovering he's a 'dancing ass [friend]' while listening to Neptunes at HB.
- Gay friends trick you into competitive dick sucking contests
- Old Black guys at work ask where hoes at; don't understand modern times
- First appearance on Kill Tony; previously tried LA show
- Army veteran who served in Korea with heartbreak and food issues
- Truck driver with pigeon-toed walk affecting dating life
- Dance-off with Adam Ray to Neptunes' 'Grinding' at end of interview
- First Black person in Kill Tony history to catch a joke book
Chris Martinez
- Introduced as 'first what appears to be Houston true Latino of the night'
Clay McLaren
Jasmine Flowers
- Mentioned in Colin's interview as taking him shooting